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alone

seabird

meandering home
SF Supporter
Yesterday, I listened to another lecture about recovery after getting away from a covert narcissist. I can see I've made some progress. I'm not frozen anymore. When I was frozen with shock I wasn't healing, more like staring in horror at the bloody shredded mess of my psyche. I'd flown many tens of thousands of miles over the last few years trying too hard to keep the relationship alive. Sold my own house, left my family and country behind and dropped my artwork contacts: it all seemed like the least I could do to make "" a new home. Instead: there's: mental health issues which damaged my work, no closure, I have no house, he kept all my stuff, and my legal right to even be over there is most likely screwed. Now I guess I start to search among the shreds for pieces to stitch together like a science-fiction alien reassembling itself.
 

AvidFan

Retired Cat Staff
SF Supporter
Yesterday, I listened to another lecture about recovery after getting away from a covert narcissist. I can see I've made some progress. I'm not frozen anymore. When I was frozen with shock I wasn't healing, more like staring in horror at the bloody shredded mess of my psyche. I'd flown many tens of thousands of miles over the last few years trying too hard to keep the relationship alive. Sold my own house, left my family and country behind and dropped my artwork contacts: it all seemed like the least I could do to make "" a new home. Instead: there's: mental health issues which damaged my work, no closure, I have no house, he kept all my stuff, and my legal right to even be over there is most likely screwed. Now I guess I start to search among the shreds for pieces to stitch together like a science-fiction alien reassembling itself.
A poignant image. I hope you can put yourself back together ❤️
 

seabird

meandering home
SF Supporter
@AvidFan Thank you. A less strange, perhaps better image is, I buy canvases, clean my palette, squeeze out all new pigments, and paint myself back into existence.

Also, I read that Australia now has a law against manipulative abuse in relationships. Too bad it wasn't in existence when I was there. This made begin thinking about writing my experience into a short book, or a long article. Then again, people get trapped by narcissists all the time so it's not exactly unique. I do think I'm neurodiverse in a couple of ways and as such I was particularly vulnerable to this covert narcissist.
 

KM76710

Kangaroo Manager
SF Pro
SF Supporter
If I don't respond to you in good time or in my usual manner, I am sorry. Please keep me in your thoughts and prayers if you are a praying person. I am facing another very difficult challenge.
You are in thoughts and prayers here. Take all the time you need or want. We will be here and doing for yourself and best for yourself is the important thing.
 

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