another bite? NO

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#1
I've never really considered myself to be someone with a serious eating dissorder but i know it does get overwhelming for me at times. It stems back to my childhood and i always blame my family for it. just the name calling and the rude remarks, chubby bunny...., woddle woddle and just toddle..., Chubs..., look how many rolls she has on her tummy..., Huge thighs.. She looks overweight. My mom always went onto me how i was overweight and should excercise more and eat less. That my sisters are skinny, so whats wrong with me? Well these small comments hurt and now i just hate looking at myself in the mirror. Sorry mum i'm me, and not like the rest of the family. Just accept that! I can't even eat properly anymore and sometimes spend afew days with nothing but tea and coffee until i feel so week i have to force something down. I can't stand seeing all these skinny little women out on the street eating away. It makes me really angry and depressed. The antidepressants i'm on don't help the situation. I get depressed loads because of my weight and then the meds just don't help, cause the side effects are weight gain. There should be some antidepressants that help you loose weight. I just can't deal with eating anymore cause the thought is always in the back of my mind that it will make me fat and ugly.
 
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i_am_not_here

#2
one sometimes wonders said:
I get depressed loads because of my weight and then the meds just don't help, cause the side effects are weight gain.
You should ask your doc whether it was sensible to put you on a course that has this particular side effect. I'm sure not all antidepressants have this effect.
 

immure

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#3
i agree i am very clear with my dr. that he can put me on nothin that has this side affect for it would be counter perductive.
and there are alternatives.
 
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letdown

#5
First of all big :hug:

I felt sad reading what you wrote. It reached me and not many things reach me nowadays..

Family can be very destructive and they don't even know it half the time because sometimes they see it as acceptable to make fun of people's bodies. I don't know. I don't understand how or why it is okay. When you wrote what they said in your post, do you sometimes say those things to yourself too?

Sorry mum i'm me, and not like the rest of the family. Just accept that!
I like that. I think it takes a lot to say that to yourself even if it's not directly to your mum. It shows that you can see outside their little bubble. Do you think you could tell your mum how hurtful her comments are to you? Perhaps she and the rest of your family will start to see you as an equal and not a thing to be belittled.

You have an important voice that needs to be heard.

You don't need to be compared to anyone or be constantly picked on. So what if people are skinnier then you? Does that make them more worthwhile human beings? Eating doesn't make you fat or ugly but nourishes your body and gives you energy to enjoy things. If you didn't, like you say, you feel weak, tired, lethargic and nothing is enjoyable anymore. You don't need to torture yourself for acceptance from people who need to realise how hurtful their comments and perhaps have serious body issues and insecurities themselves and are projecting things on you. People eat, whether they are thin, average or overweight for lots of reasons, one of the reasons may be because they enjoy eating and there is nothing wrong with that. Take care.
 
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