bad news

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#1
Im 23 and im a former Marine and im also into bodybuilding. I work out consistently because it levels me out without having to take medicine. The other day I had to go to the emergency room and they said I have a hernia. Doc said I can't lift anything for a long time and its going to be even longer until my next appt. My life is already extremely difficult because I have huge self esteem issues and im very sensitive. Now I just want to kill myself. I've been strong for so long but now I don't know what to do. All my hard work is going to diminish cuz I can't work out. I feel fucking worthless.
 

Shock

Well-Known Member
#3
Hi there, I am sorry to hear about your injury!

Youve probably thought of this already but could you possibly replace the body building with something new like a hobby? I know it won't give you the same physical benefits but as far as distractions go it could be good. To give you a personal example, when I was feeling down I started making myself learn about motorcycle maintenance. At first it was a bit of a chore but the more I did it the more I started actually enjoying it. Also, I did not tell anyone I was tinkering - I did not want the added pressure of people standing over my shoulder 'correcting' or criticizing me.

Hope that helps in some way!
 

spooky

Active Member
#4
Hi 2nd,

First, let me say THANK YOU for serving our country. Second, OOH RAH! My husband was a sailor :)

A hernia is not an incurable condition. Depending on what kind you have it may require surgery but the recovery is relatively quick and there's only a small chance of a recurrence.

I'm sorry you're having a difficult time right now. I hope you know there are many supportive people on this web site who are more than willing to listen.

Be safe,

Spooky :ghost:
 

Sadeyes

Staff Alumni
#5
I do understand what you have said...recently, due to a debilitating disease I have had to redefine who I am and what counts as my self-worth...I struggle with this so often now, and know how very difficult it is...please try to find other things that you can consider your attributes...big hugs, J
 
#6
I just wanted to say thank you to everyone for being very supportive. Especially now when I feel completely useless and alone. I will try to keep my head up and stay positive. This truly is a difficult time for me. The only thing keeping me from ending it all is my daughter. And Ifeel worse when I think about hurting myself cuz my daughter didn't do anything wrong so why should she go without having a father
 

flowers

Senior Member
#7
The only thing keeping me from ending it all is my daughter. And Ifeel worse when I think about hurting myself cuz my daughter didn't do anything wrong so why should she go without having a father
Well said. Yes, your daughter is a very important reason to stay around. I am sorry you have to deal with that. I have had hernia surgery. Sorry you have a hernia. No fun. But the situaltion will be temporary. Not that this is much consolation in the moment.

I also understand about loosing the things that made everthing feel balanced enough to continue on. I have lost two of the things that were the most important to me. Cooking and baking amazing creations for people and planting in my garden. I live alone. And it was the times I got to see people).

When I lost what little money I had everything came crashing in. I was keeping the house of cards going by things that cost a bit of money. Not much. But still I had to stop it all when the money went away 3 years ago. At that very same time, my health crashed. Causing my "house of cards" to crash in on me. And yes, I did actually have to start taking meds. Although I am not saying that will be your situation.

Sometimes, when we keep that house of cards up, we never get to face whats underneeth it. And therefore we do not get to heal some of that stuff. Hernias are temporary. Just please be careful to not overdo it pre-op. And through the post op time. You have come to a very good place, (SF). Lots of understanding supportive people here.
 

spooky

Active Member
#8
2ndCity, please tell us about your daughter. How old is she? Is she in school? What about her makes you happy? I don't have children but I have heard it's amazing.

:ghost:
 
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