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Do I need to cheer up, or is there actually something wrong?

Dante

Learned how to make a custom title in only 5 years
SF Supporter
#1
I've been asking myself this question a lot lately since I had a weird kinda micro-breakdown a month or two ago, and at the same time I have been trying to sum up exactly how I DO feel so that I can ask this question properly.

I feel fine normally, maybe a little overly anxious about the littlest things, but otherwise OK, but I can also feel how thin that veneer of "fine" really is, like skating on a frozen over pond and hearing the ice cracking behind me and if I stop too long it breaks and I fall into the bottomless icy depths and realise it was there all the time, constant misery, a screaming yawning abyss of isolation and emptiness pervaded by a constant countdown timer to my own death ticking away always way too fast and I just cant see the point of anything if its all just going to end anyway, like life itself is just a way too prolonged death sentence.

It is also worth mentioning that I was nearly in a very serious car crash on Friday, I came within a hair's breadth of being rear-ended on the motorway by some jack-ass driving around 100mph (an honest estimation based on my speed plus speed difference) if I hadn't looked in the mirror at just the right time by sheer dumb luck and swerved then who knows, but even though I experience anxiety over every tiny part of my life, I have not felt any serious feelings about that near-collision, in fact, I have noticed a wholly pathetic showing from my survival instinct this last week, its actually been quite useful at work, though drilling into walls I suspect have electrical wires running through them or climbing to the edge of a roof because I'm running a cable and not worrying about how loose the tiles are (they were moving under my feet) are probably bad signs its not like I'm trying to take risks, I just don't seem to care as much as I should.

So, here comes the question, do I just need to cheer up and also realise I'm just a little braver than I thought, or is there something wrong with me?
 

sinking_ship

woman overboard
Forum Pro
SF Supporter
#2
Seems like you think there is some way you *should* be feeling, but feelings just happen, they're not right or wrong.
 

BarryW

SF Supporter
#3
Maybe you have less fear/anxiety about traffic-related issues than other types of issues?

I wouldn't tell anyone to cheer up, because I don't even know what that means anymore. Or maybe I believe that cheering up is an action done by person A onto person B (with low success rates), and not something a person can do to themself.
 

Human Ex Machinae

Void Where Prohibited
#4
I just cant see the point of anything if its all just going to end anyway, like life itself is just a way too prolonged death sentence.
It kind of is. After all, the leading cause of death is being alive. But that doesn't mean it isn't worthwhile. It's a big, grand experience that can be compared to the micro experiences within it. Like a roller-coaster ride: It's no less thrilling and exciting because we know it's going to end in a few minutes. Or sex. Think of life as the most gorgeous, attractive person you'll ever meet, who wants to have sex with you. I'm sure you wouldn't say, "Nah, thanks, but there's no point to it. I mean, eventually, we're going to have to stop having sex, right? We can't keep having sex forever, so, forget it."
It is also worth mentioning that I was nearly in a very serious car crash on Friday, I came within a hair's breadth of being rear-ended on the motorway by some jack-ass driving around 100mph (an honest estimation based on my speed plus speed difference) if I hadn't looked in the mirror at just the right time by sheer dumb luck and swerved then who knows, but even though I experience anxiety over every tiny part of my life, I have not felt any serious feelings about that near-collision, in fact, I have noticed a wholly pathetic showing from my survival instinct this last week, its actually been quite useful at work, though drilling into walls I suspect have electrical wires running through them or climbing to the edge of a roof because I'm running a cable and not worrying about how loose the tiles are (they were moving under my feet) are probably bad signs its not like I'm trying to take risks, I just don't seem to care as much as I should.
Survival instincts don't just protect us, they also protect the people around us, as the near collision illustrates. You should definitely be careful on the edge of a roof with loose tiles for your own sake, but also, for the poor schmuck who's walking below and wouldn't be delighted to have someone land on his head when he's just out to go buy some oat milk.
So, here comes the question, do I just need to cheer up and also realise I'm just a little braver than I thought, or is there something wrong with me?
'Cheering up' is a worthwhile goal, but it's momentary and hard to sustain. Contentment though is easier to achieve and sustain for longer periods of time.
 

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