well. im a diagnosed ednos. ive also done time in an ED unit for anorexia / ednos - restrictive.....
at the moment. im at my hw.
well. i WAS at my hw.
i dont know what i am now.
but im on a rollercoaster with food.
one minute im eating everything in sight (and i mean EVERYTHING).
the next. im starving myself and refusing meals.
i mean, to give a perfect example, today i decided that i was happier when i was starving (ie - fasting).
so the nurse said to me "are you going to eat something" . and my response was "i didnt eat this morning, im not going to eat this afternoon and im definantly not going to eat tonight."
lets just say my smarta**ed comments dont go far here.
i just keep having nurses come up to me with food. which im disposing of.
im execptionally suicidal at the moment.
im in here for major depression / anxiety / panic disorders. mostly the depression though. my ed isnt supposed to be a factor.
they shouldnt be trying to feed me.
but im so confused about how one day i can eat like a normal person.
and the next, im starving myself and wishing i could keep it up for days.....
i have a feeling my ed is out of control again. but i dont want to end up in the ED unit again..... which will happen if i admit to food problems....
i guess im just looking for people who understand. and some advice on how to keep my intake at a reasonable level. for me and for the "professionals".
xx.
at the moment. im at my hw.
well. i WAS at my hw.
i dont know what i am now.
but im on a rollercoaster with food.
one minute im eating everything in sight (and i mean EVERYTHING).
the next. im starving myself and refusing meals.
i mean, to give a perfect example, today i decided that i was happier when i was starving (ie - fasting).
so the nurse said to me "are you going to eat something" . and my response was "i didnt eat this morning, im not going to eat this afternoon and im definantly not going to eat tonight."
lets just say my smarta**ed comments dont go far here.
i just keep having nurses come up to me with food. which im disposing of.
im execptionally suicidal at the moment.
im in here for major depression / anxiety / panic disorders. mostly the depression though. my ed isnt supposed to be a factor.
they shouldnt be trying to feed me.
but im so confused about how one day i can eat like a normal person.
and the next, im starving myself and wishing i could keep it up for days.....
i have a feeling my ed is out of control again. but i dont want to end up in the ED unit again..... which will happen if i admit to food problems....
i guess im just looking for people who understand. and some advice on how to keep my intake at a reasonable level. for me and for the "professionals".
xx.