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greiving someone you didnt really know

#1
earlier this year i got a phone call to say my dad had passed away suddenly in a freak accident (he lived in poland and was hit by a bus that skipped a red light when he was on his moped)
our relationship was almost none existent. my mum left him when i was tiny. no contact until my teenage years. where it was just emails and a few letters. thats about it. but when i got that phone call i physically crumbled to the floor. ive spent the past few months grieving, being bitter, angry, upset even happy he had passed.
i don't understand how i can be so devastated over loosing a man i barley knew. please can anyone spread some insight on this as im struggling with it
 
#2
I'm so sorry for your loss, Izzie.
It's not unusual at all that you would feel that way. For one thing, he is your dad. And even if you've not had much contact with him, that wouldn't necessarily mean you wouldn't have a emotional connection to him.
It could also be that, from the sounds of it, he was a good man. He never would've hurt you, so there was no emotional or safety reason not to see him more, talk more, etc. And when he died, that chance was lost. Possibly causing regret.
Whatever the reason, you may be struggling, but you are very strong to go through something so painful, especially when it's confusing to you. 💖
 

Walker

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#3
I feel like maybe you grieve the person you didn't get to know. I'm sorry for your loss. *console
 

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