Hanging on by a thread

[LoveBeing]

…”no one alive is enlightened”…very interesting…

…”almost given up on life”? Is enlightenment not about life??

“The mind is a trickster” - right on, Johnnie. It’s great that you are aware of this. Maybe you can see that you are not the mind or what the mind thinks you are…?

Please hang in there - you can give yourself as much time as you so choose to see through the mind...

 

[foolnomore]

Had a bad night so not thinking to clearly today. The good news is I have an appointment with a psychiatrist in the morning to review my meds so hopefully they can give me something to help me sleep and get me stable again. I don't ask that I feel on top of the world all the time ,that is just not me,but I don;t want to feel like this anymore.

 

[WildCherry]

Yeah, I don't blame you. Why the bad night, just couldn't sleep, or too much stuff running through your head?

 

[foolnomore]

The visit from the Home treatment team yesterday evening unsettled me and they didn't leave a sleeping pill. They sent two men which took me by surprise ,and they were scared shitless by our dog who is the softest mutt ever and he was on the lead so couldn't go and lick them.My daughter had to take him out for a walk which left me alone with two men I have never seen before. I had wanted my daughter there so she knows what is going on and knows I am not hiding anything ,so it all left me in a bit of a state and now I am worried about what to do with the dog as he has seperation anxiety and cries and yelps if locked in another room which will frighten the nurses even more than him sitting on the end of a lead!

 

[WildCherry]

Is there someone you can contact at a main office, maybe ask them to note on your account that you have a dog but the dog will be kept on lead at all times and won't hurt anyone? If it's going to be the same people stopping by each time, eventually you might be able to familiarize the dog with them enough so that you won't need the lead each time.

I can totally understand how the visit would have been unnerving though. :hug:

 

[foolnomore]

I have an appointment with the psychiatrist in the morning so while I am there I will try to see if I can sort something out, also if they are sending two men they could warn me even five minutes before they arrive would be ok , it was just a shock because I didn't realise that they would send two men to visit a woman i thought it would be a man and a woman. When I am ok I am fine with men but when I am like this I find it hard to talk ,don't know why because I am not anti man or normally tongue tied around them

 

[WildCherry]

When you expect one thing, and something different happens, it's a shock. Especially if you're feeling low and having trouble to begin with. It'd probably be helpful if they could call you a few minutes beforehand, give you an idea of who to expect and when they'll be there.

 

[foolnomore]

I am not the best at waiting for visitors when I am at my best ,this is a nightmare. In the past when I have had cpn and support workers they always called to say they were on their way or they were delayed,this lot havent done that. I have turned off the door buzzer because it makes the dog bark and I don't want the team get anxious but it means I have to sit and look out of the window for them . No buzzer,no barking so less to frighten them.

 

[WildCherry]

I don't know if this would help any, or even be possible. But if you'd rather them not ring the buzzer, can you put a note on the door asking them to call you when they've arrived? That way, they'd see the note and call, and you don't have to sit there and watch for them. Because just all the waiting has got to be stressful.

 

[foolnomore]

Thank you for that idea I hadn't thought of that ,my brain is just not running on full power at the moment. It's a good idea so will give it a try/I don't want them kicking the door down because they get no reply

 

[WildCherry]

Have they arrived yet, or are you still waiting?

 

[LoveBeing]

It’s understandable, Johnnie...

Also, it may take a while to sort things out or set up a kind of new routine before things can go more smoothly…

With loving wishes and hugs :hug:

 

[foolnomore]

They did arrive but got lost getting here and had to phone me for directions. Again it was two that were scared of dogs! My daughter had to take him out. At least it was a man and a woman and she was lovely . Have an appointment with the psychiatrist at the hospital this morning so will see if I can talk to someone there about the dog problem. Another sleepless night as she couldn't give me a sleeping pill but I will ask today if he can prescribe some.
Thank you all for youe support

 

[WildCherry]

Hope today's appoint goes OK! :hug:

 

[foolnomore]

Seen the shrink -he was really nice. See him again next week,he is arranging for me to see the psychologist probably next week too. Have a form to fill in for long term therapy of some sort with a psychologist. Gave me all the gumf from MIND and suggested when I am up to it joining some of their activities or going to the day centre at the hospital and joining some of theirs (they have a gym so fuck that) He has upped my meds and prescribed sleeping tablets ,so it is all good so far. They are still going to visit every evening to dole out the meds . Honestly I am overwhelmed by the care and treatment I have recieved /am recieving , You all have such horror stories but honestly apart from them being scared of dogs I have no complaints at all.

 

[WildCherry]

That's awesome!!! Especially that they're giving you something to help you sleep. It's torture when you want to sleep, but you can't.

Did they give you any ideas about how to handle the situation with the dog? Lol I've just had a UPS delivery guy, like 5 minutes ago, go running down my sidewalk at the sound of my barking dog. The door was closed, and he couldn't even see her. I guess he wanted to keep it that way.

 

[foolnomore]

The sleep thing would be a nightmare if I could sleep long enough to have one
Apparently all the male nurses on the team are terrified of dogs and there are only a couple of female nurses one dog friendly one nervous but not terrified. I have told them he is not at all viscious and I will keep him on a lead and well away from them but that is the best I can do.
Sorry men but why are so many of you scared of dogs? I have had experiences like yours with the UPS guy but have to say the postmen love him and give him fuss if they see him. they don't seem to be afraid.

 

[WildCherry]

Hopefully when you do get some sleep, there won't be any nightmares involved!

You're right, that's the best you can do. As long as he's on a lead, there shouldn't be any problems. You make a good point, it does seem like it's mostly guys that are afraid of dogs. Or at least that's how it seems with mine anyway. With her, she's LOUD, and I guess that scares people. She's a small Shepherd with a HUGE bark, Lol!

 

[foolnomore]

Ours is a neutered staffordshire/boxer cross. He barks if someone buzzes at the door but the minute the door opens his tail is wagging and he will sit and whimper if a visitor doesn't pet him-not exactly a sign of ferocity He has seperation anxiety and will cry and whimper if put in another room. He would make a terrible guard dog ! The most dangerious thing about him are his farts -they are lethal!

 

[foolnomore]

1 hours sleep last night,I am shattered but sleep wont come. Have housework to do but no motivation and feel too tired to do it. Everything takes so much effort it is exhausting