Not great - had an emotional meltdown today
Discussed my mental health with my doctor (GP) - advising that I mask or minimize depression symptoms. She said I always sound "perky" on the phone. I said I have worked for 25 years in call centres and I probably sounded perky when I was suicidal. She did understand in the end and said maybe I need to let how I feel show through. Well, duh. Anyway she has referred me for urgent psychiatric care in my new city. I need a med review and probably need to back on Abilify because my sleep is so off.
Went for a haircut/dye and they dyed my roots too dark. I am very pale and I don't like it. I know it will fade but not sure it will fade enough
Tried to make a double recipe of blueberry scones, and I screwed up while trying to focus on the double ingredients. I ruined the dough. This is when I had my meltdown. I said I am useless and can't do anything and I'm so ugly (the fluorescent light at the salon didn't do my pale face any favours). My husband tried to talk me down but i was really upset. I have a friend coming over tomorrow with her boyfriend, and yes, I want to socialize but I am not feeling social right now, and now we don't have any food to offer them and I'm on a special diet so can't go to a restaurant. I'm sure it will work out, but... Damn. I just want a different life. One where I have good skin and can socialize without having an anxious breakdown.