• IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT: Please read THIS THREAD about a rebrand for SF.

How Are You Feeling Right Now?

AvidFan

Retired Cat Staff
SF Supporter
Confused and anxious. Due to the seller mess up with my running shoes, I got a replacement but the seller sent a return bag asking me to post the wrong ones back. But I haven't been in a post office for years, last time I went I queued for 40 minutes. Couldn't bear to go in ever again and didn't need to, Until now. You'd think it would be simple, the label on the bag says Click and Drop. The royal mail site makes it sound so easy - just go in the post office, drop it off and go.... no scanning, no queuing, no anything. So I checked if my local post office has one of these drop and go things and it does - and it says all I need to to do is bring my items and my click and go account number. If all I'm doing is dropping it off and it's already paid, why do I need that? It has a pre-paid label on it. Apparently they now have self serve kiosks, these drop and go things, probably one person on one counter and a massive line up, I can see me ending up lining up for half an hour just to be told to put the parcel in the box at the end. I really hate this kind of thing - and it's not my fault. Think a decent seller would have said forget it instead of telling me to take an hour out of my day to return their rubbish 4.5 size trainers. Should have stuck to Amazon Prime or sellers who send the correct item 😒 Not a big deal, I just don't feel too good with my sleep lately and had hoped for a quiet day off today. I'll try to get it done now.
 
I feel like my life was a waste. I held on to this fantasy that if I devoted myself to my kids, they would appreciate it. But my God I was wrong. I feel abandoned by them, except for my youngest...who depends on me for so much.
I finally told my oldest daughter last weekend that I was feeling incredibly lonely and her response was...me too, I'm going to play a game on my phone and go to sleep. I just told her I loved her and left it at that.
I don't know what to do with these incredibly difficult feelings. I feel like I'm not even good enough for my kids. I try and msg and set up video chats with my granddaughters but nobody ever responds until days later and then I get told they're really busy. I feel like I don't matter. I feel like I did something wrong and none of my kids want anything to do with me.
This is the worst I've felt in a very long time. I'm crying in the dark as I watch a movie with my son. I just don't understand my life at this point.
I'm afraid this will push me over the edge and impulsiveness will overcome me. *blue
 

1964dodge

Has a monkey as a friend
Safety & Support
SF Supporter
I feel like my life was a waste. I held on to this fantasy that if I devoted myself to my kids, they would appreciate it. But my God I was wrong. I feel abandoned by them, except for my youngest...who depends on me for so much.
I finally told my oldest daughter last weekend that I was feeling incredibly lonely and her response was...me too, I'm going to play a game on my phone and go to sleep. I just told her I loved her and left it at that.
I don't know what to do with these incredibly difficult feelings. I feel like I'm not even good enough for my kids. I try and msg and set up video chats with my granddaughters but nobody ever responds until days later and then I get told they're really busy. I feel like I don't matter. I feel like I did something wrong and none of my kids want anything to do with me.
This is the worst I've felt in a very long time. I'm crying in the dark as I watch a movie with my son. I just don't understand my life at this point.
I'm afraid this will push me over the edge and impulsiveness will overcome me. *blue
try to be patient, some kids leave in the late teens and don't reconnect in a meaningful way until late 20s and early 30s. mine kind of ignored us a bit in that age range. they will fly home again

mike....*hug*shake
 

TragicReality

I wish I could turn back time
SF Supporter
met my brother today for the first time in 21 years. i thought it was 32 but made a mistake. it went ok we talked for close to half an hour, anxiety started rising so we left early. i think it will take time to mend a 21 year old rift. there is bad blood on both sides. so we agreed the past is the past and we rebuild our relationship from now. i was shocked to look at his picture and in person. before we grew old we looked completely different, now we could almost pass for twins, he even has a long white beard like me lol

after seeing other members strugglng with siblings here and some of them reconsiled i figure i need to do it before it's too late. i'm 66 in poor health and he's 70 with two heart attacks. the window was closing. so i reached out with the olive branch and he acted very gracious.

mike
a
I'm glad you met him even though it could have been nerve wracking. I have 2 siblings, brother hasn't talked since my dad died, going on to 3 yrs soon. My sister is controlling, she doesn't care to hear when I'm happy only pricks up her ears if it's my mental health deteriorating. I should just stop any communication with her. She's assaulted me twice, I've never laid a hand on her. sorry went on about me, yes time makes a difference but the quality of a relationship is more meaningful, to me at least. hugs mike. I hope you feel better and hugs for your wife too.
 

TragicReality

I wish I could turn back time
SF Supporter
They are in their 20s and 30s. They only talk to me when they need something.
It's hard when our kids grow up and not want to talk or do much. I'm there myself except my younger still needs support, but the money can't keep happening. He needs to work to help his depression. I'm sorry for what you're feeling. hugs
 

TragicReality

I wish I could turn back time
SF Supporter
I'm not feeling really great... I'm on a vacation but the most important thing got left in my car, my phone with all my ticket bar codes. going thru the airport was a major hassle and I lost something expensive that would have gone with my phone that isn't with me. THis is all I can do while I have slow internet wifi access here. The breeze is warm. I'm staying in a shabby looking place but they had a pool, so I did that. Been up since 4 am and it's close to after 11 pm here. I enjoyed the feeling of the smaller plane and turbulence.

I feel like I wont sleep. My phone was my alarm too, not just tickets. Nothing to complain about, it's warm, I'm sweating with the ac on but I want the humidity too so i opened a window.

My younger son is a gem. He was the first to answer an email and worry that I don't have my phone. I know he cares even if he says some really crappy things to me. He needs help with depression and having a fiancee that broke up with him while she was pregnant. Sorry, I have nothing else to occupy myself, I have my laptop but that's it. I didn't think I'd come on here but I love feeling like I belong somewhere. I dont' know why I'm sweating so much lately not just here.
Hugs to all suffering, I mean that. You are all great people
 

Please Donate to Help Keep SF Running

Total amount
$45.00
Goal
$255.00
Top