How Are You Feeling Right Now?

[LumberJack]

like sh$t ! the pain is so bad that tears are rolling down my cheeks. i'm not crying it's a natural body reaction to pain which can't be controllled. i was laying in bed thinking why bother to take my pain meds, why bother doing anything to survive. fear not though because i took pain meds and will eventually start to do better.

of course it doesn't help that i can't bring my 64 dodge home for at least a week maybe more

mike

Sorry Mike. I hope your meds have kicked in by now. I’m no stranger to pain, but it sounds like yours is on another level. I wish I could help.

 

[LumberJack]

I feel like my brain is busy busy busy. Just a lot of words going around, not necessarily making sense. Anybody else have this?

 

[Survivorist]

Hey Mike, I am so sorry for your pain. Take medication - end of story. Worse is that your loved Dodge64 is not ready. Man - you should have some fun, ha? Greetings from Spain.

 

[Survivorist]

Better - but action has to follow. - plans are not enough. But I am quite strong. I hope I will make it - until the next "free fall".
How was that?

 

[1964dodge]

Sorry to hear you are in such pain. I wish I could take some of it for you 😢

me too jk., my pan is finally down some, thank you

mike...

 

[1964dodge]

Not been a great day. Felt pretty lousy. A lot of stress and things happening around me. My kids struggling and I feel as if I am being pulled between everyone. As someone once said, everyone takes a slice of me. Managed to avoid self harm, even though earlier I was convinced I would. I ask myself, what difference would it make? How would tomorrow be different if I self harmed today? The answer is, it wouldn’t be any different, so why do it? And yet the urge to do it is still strong. I am trying to learn to live with this daily, and not act upon it. Maybe one day the urge will lesson.

i'm sorry that you still have the urge to sh but i'm ptoud that you could overcome it. i hope tomorrow is a better day for you

mike.....

 

[1964dodge]

Sorry it's such a "tough-night," Mike... & that they can't do more for you! Hope the edge dies off the worst of it, soon~*.

thank you @MisterBGone it has come down to a reasonable level

mike....

 

[1964dodge]

Hey Mike, I am so sorry for your pain. Take medication - end of story. Worse is that your loved Dodge64 is not ready. Man - you should have some fun, ha? Greetings from Spain.

i wonder how much it would cost to ship my 64 dodge to spain, no winter storage lol. i think not being able to get her home is starting to get to me. it always reduces stress and this maybe saturday for 4 weeks is really pissing me off lol

mike.....

 

[1964dodge]

Better - but action has to follow. - plans are not enough. But I am quite strong. I hope I will make it - until the next "free fall".
How was that?

you are strong to make it this far. if you are pretty certain there will be another freefall, try now, while you are doing better is the time to plan ahead. have a plan to help keep you safe and mentally prepared. now would be a good idea to start a journal showing your progress, this way when things get bad you can see your true strength

mike....

 

[1964dodge]

Sorry Mike. I hope your meds have kicked in by now. I’m no stranger to pain, but it sounds like yours is on another level. I wish I could help.

my pain is so much worse than what most people could handle, but on the other side of the coin there are people that have worse pain than i have. my wife asked me more than once, how do i survive this pain. i told her the truth, i survive it because i have no choice. does that make me a hero or something special ? no i just survive because i have no choice. and the 10 scale moves as your pain increases because we measure our own pain by our own lowest and highest. i am lucky i have pain meds and other ways to eventually knock down my pain

mike....

 

[1964dodge]

I feel like my brain is busy busy busy. Just a lot of words going around, not necessarily making sense. Anybody else have this?

sometimes, i think most of us wish we had an off switch for our brain sometimes

mike....

 

[1964dodge]

i am feeling much better now. pain is down to a reasonable level. sometimes though when i'm laying down and in pain i wish i never got better if that makes sense. like before i could just wallow in self pity and wish i could end it. but since i got better i know that eventually i'll be feeling better and pain will get better. me getting better of course it's good but well you know lol

mike

 

[JMG]

have a plan to help keep you safe and mentally prepared. now would be a good idea to start a journal showing your progress, this way when things get bad you can see your true strength

Yup, truly excellent advice here about the journal helping remind you of your true strength, I have literally done just that with “reading old journals” when I have felt especially helpless/hopeless and low. It helped a lot

i think most of us wish we had an off switch for our brain sometimes

Yup, I definitely wish for that too!

i am feeling much better now. pain is down to a reasonable level. sometimes though when i'm laying down and in pain i wish i never got better if that makes sense. like before i could just wallow in self pity and wish i could end it. but since i got better i know that eventually i'll be feeling better and pain will get better. me getting better of course it's good but well you know lol

Hey Mike, just wanted to say I’m delighted that you are feeling much better now! Sorry I wasn’t in here earlier when you said it was bad, I guess if I had been then I most likely woulda said very similar things to what others already said anyway lol. Anyway I understand what you said about pain, I mean from what you’ve described it sounds like yours is far more than I could maybe truly imagine, but I have definitely experienced it a bit and I know when I thought it was gonna be “over” and then there was more that it was so disappointing and felt like it was some cruel joke from the universe or something. Just did my best to be strong through it, and to always be prepared for it to “happen again” which makes my enjoyment of “non-pain” a bit less, but also when I do have it then also makes that “less” too, so that part makes it worth it to me anyway. I wish you the best of luck that there won’t ever be pain again though, of course

Wishing the best for everyone else here too, always

For those who are currently feeling good - awesome, I’m very happy for you and am always wishing the best that you will feel that way as much as you possibly can

For those not feeling good - My deepest sympathy and compassion is with you, and I wish that you’ll be feeling better/happier/calmer/peaceful/more balanced and everything else good/positive as soon as possible

Lots of hugs for all those who are wanting/needing them too of course, for today and for always

 

[Witty_Sarcasm]

But what did the Rolling Stones, have?

Aren't you like 110 years old now? Surely you know this.

 

[MisterBGone]

Aren't you like 110 years old now? Surely you know this.

Why yes, you should be bowing to me when ever you see me on here!

 

[AmberMarie]

Exhausted, rundown, worn-out, and defeated.

 

[MisterBGone]

Exhausted, rundown, worn-out, and defeated.

s!!

 

[Pebble mouse]

I don't want to be here.

 

[MisterBGone]

I don't want to be here.

Wish it wasn't so, @Pebble mouse ~

 

[JMG]

Forgot to say anything about how I was feeling when I posted in here yesterday, well I am still pretty amazed that I am not an emo mess from the big change that will most likely be happening in a few months from now, but trying to just stay as positively focused about that and everything else as I possibly can.

Other things I’m feeling are worried, afraid, apprehensive, uncertain, confused, guilty and envious about something which is also making me feel uncomfortable cos I rarely feel envy of anyone I’m related to.