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How Are You Feeling Right Now?
- Thread starter UNREGISTERED0000
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Oh man, last day of the work training, and today we practiced on how to take calls from the customer. I messed it all up because 1) I was nervous af, everyone was looking at me, everyone was judging me of course 2) I'm losing my English, and we have to take calls from international customers 3) I just hate calls in general. Seriously I fucked it up, if I was the manager, I would have fired myself on the spot, cuz that's how bad it was. Anyways, I'm very surprised that the managers were very chill about it. They didn't scold me or anything, just giving advices on how I could do better. I mean, yes, that's how it's supposed to be, but I was so bad that I was half-expecting them to yell at me or something, or at least express some disappointment, but they didn't. Maybe cuz it's only the first week, but I don't know.
On the other hand, the woman I had practice with (one of the staff) noticed that I sounded nervous and I was a bit embarrassed of course, but I think she'll forget about it and she's not my manager anyway so. I practiced the 2nd call with my friend and she pretended to be an angry customer but since she's my friend, I know her, and we are pretty close already, I was able to joke a bit but still I messed it up even worse and I'm lucky that it was only a practice call with my friend! Again, I was expected to get scolded, but they didn't do it, just giving advices and being chill about it. My friend even said sorry that she pretended to be mad.
I feel very lucky to be in that kind of environment. What I will do next (this weekend), I will try to imagine every possible scenarios in customer calls and make notes of them, so I'll be able to pull the notes up and read from there when I take the calls. I'm so bad at calls. I'm still surprised they didn't fire me on the spot. Damn.
On the other hand, the woman I had practice with (one of the staff) noticed that I sounded nervous and I was a bit embarrassed of course, but I think she'll forget about it and she's not my manager anyway so. I practiced the 2nd call with my friend and she pretended to be an angry customer but since she's my friend, I know her, and we are pretty close already, I was able to joke a bit but still I messed it up even worse and I'm lucky that it was only a practice call with my friend! Again, I was expected to get scolded, but they didn't do it, just giving advices and being chill about it. My friend even said sorry that she pretended to be mad.
I feel very lucky to be in that kind of environment. What I will do next (this weekend), I will try to imagine every possible scenarios in customer calls and make notes of them, so I'll be able to pull the notes up and read from there when I take the calls. I'm so bad at calls. I'm still surprised they didn't fire me on the spot. Damn.
Even that little treat turned into a palaver.
A) It started to rain heavily and I didn't bring a coat, fortunately had an umbrella. Wasn't too bad because the Greggs is only a very short walk away....
B) The Greggs that has been there for about 50 years is no longer there, some unrecognisable something has opened in its stead. But not to worry, there's the Greggs in the Arndale, at least that will be inside out of the rain
C) The Greggs in the Arndale has its shutters down for no clear reason, there were people and lights on inside but no idea what was going on, still, there's the other Greggs round the corner, if it hasn't moved or closed....
D). It's open, but full of people. I asked for a cheese and onion bake, to be told it was 8 minutes they were still in the oven. Knowing that freshly baked Greggs is like eating hot coals, I got a vegan sausage roll to tide me over, but was still hungry. But there is another one the other side of the office that is always open, so I went the long way round.
E) Finally - they have the holy grail of a cheese and onion bake. She puts it in the bag and says it's not very hot. That's an understatement. It's luke warm at best. I take my cold pastie and it gets wet as I fumble with my umbrella trying to work the door fob.
F) The satisfaction level after all that effort is distinctly underwhelming.
And that's my meal break moan over with!
A) It started to rain heavily and I didn't bring a coat, fortunately had an umbrella. Wasn't too bad because the Greggs is only a very short walk away....
B) The Greggs that has been there for about 50 years is no longer there, some unrecognisable something has opened in its stead. But not to worry, there's the Greggs in the Arndale, at least that will be inside out of the rain
C) The Greggs in the Arndale has its shutters down for no clear reason, there were people and lights on inside but no idea what was going on, still, there's the other Greggs round the corner, if it hasn't moved or closed....
D). It's open, but full of people. I asked for a cheese and onion bake, to be told it was 8 minutes they were still in the oven. Knowing that freshly baked Greggs is like eating hot coals, I got a vegan sausage roll to tide me over, but was still hungry. But there is another one the other side of the office that is always open, so I went the long way round.
E) Finally - they have the holy grail of a cheese and onion bake. She puts it in the bag and says it's not very hot. That's an understatement. It's luke warm at best. I take my cold pastie and it gets wet as I fumble with my umbrella trying to work the door fob.
F) The satisfaction level after all that effort is distinctly underwhelming.
And that's my meal break moan over with!
Strangely philosophical and calm. This is definitely my more natural state after years of meditation, practice and "doing the work". I have more on my plate than any person could reasonably be expected to deal with alone and remain sane, but I am currently thinking/feeling "Feeling shit about it won't change it, I will work at the issues but it's not worth losing my sanity over, I might as well be happy in this moment". This makes a change from bugshit anxious and feeling like the only escape from the unbearable anxious feeling of dread is CTB, which is why feeling so anxious has been worrying me as well. The tightness in my stomach has relented a bit. Maybe it's megadosing l-theanine, but after getting about 2 hours of sleep I've been feeling functional, despite setbacks. Hope that it lasts! 🙏 Hopefully I can actually solve some of the problems if people ever start getting back to me and actually being able to come and look.
Kind of tired. Had a few flashes of anxiety but probably adrenaline spike from having little sleep. I hope my brain has got the insomnia out of its system the last few nights as I could do with an actual sleep tonight then try to enjoy the weekend. One thing is for sure, it's hard enough to get builders and roofers to do anything at the best of times, on a weekend and with England playing there isn't a cat in hell's chance of even seeing one so I think it's fair to say I might as well forget my home fixing quest until Monday. When there's nothing to be done in a situation, it can be the sane option to do nothing instead of fretting. I trust my house won't fall down in the next 2 days.
Exhausted and sad. I am moving from a downstairs room up to a second floor room. So all of my worldly belongings have to go up 2 flights of stairs. Every muscle in my legs is screaming at me, but I have to get all my stuff out before tomorrow. There’s always something else coming up that I didn’t think of ahead of time, which is stressing me out. I’m sad probably because of fatigue. It’s 100f out and almost 80 indoors. I can handle it if I’m not moving around, but I have been carrying crap all day and never stop sweating.
The exercise does seem to be helping my mood, though. It’s too hard to think about my self hatred because I am trying to stay hydrated and keep my back from straining.
The exercise does seem to be helping my mood, though. It’s too hard to think about my self hatred because I am trying to stay hydrated and keep my back from straining.
Awake. It was 4.30am when I woke up, used the loo then went back to bed, got another chapter of sleep but at 6.30am that was it, no chance of getting sleepy again. Got this horrible weird sensation again, it's like being permanently hungry but not hungry, it's not pain it's not discomfort, it's just weird - I couldn't even see a doctor about it because I can't describe it well enough for them to even make sense of it. Very likely it's a combination of stress and benzo belly. I wasn't feeling too stressed but anxiety is coming and going. I can't afford to be ill or exhausted, it's simply not an option if I want to survive. The only thing keeping me going is my line in the sand next March that I have to get over before considering getting out of this nonsense altogether. I can do that with credit, with sticky tape, with strategising so I know I've got that long, doubt the house will fall down before then if I can sort the windows and roof before winter. After that I don't know but I'll cross that bridge when I get to it. If I have to go, I want to at least leave the smoothest path for those I leave behind with my affairs in as much order as possible, and at least a bit of a financial return for dealing with the shit I leave behind, rather then a pile of debts and other liabilities.
So it's Saturday, I'll drink coffee and potter about. I did start writing an essay here but doubt the wisdom of going on about things and have already gone on quite a bit!
So it's Saturday, I'll drink coffee and potter about. I did start writing an essay here but doubt the wisdom of going on about things and have already gone on quite a bit!
I couldn't imagine moving all my worldly belongings. I tried to get rid of much of them when my house was for sale, taking bags daily to the charity shop on my daily commute to the office (big Oxfam round the corner, just dump books etc in a big collection box). I still have too much shit.
I hope the exercise helped a bit.
I hope the exercise helped a bit.
Curious. There is a dollop of ant bait and in the centre of it one dead ant. It was either a very hungry ant thinking it had hit the jackpot, proceeding to dive into this lake of food and drowning itself, or it has deliberately killed itself to mark the bait as unsafe to the rest of the colony. At least they have stopped using the floor as a dumping ground the last couple of days, but the anticipated mass of ants swarming to self destruct has not happened.