disgruntled . Don’t know if I am tired or just the job search is not progressing and I’m already discouraged and disappointed. I was hoping to avoid feeling this way. I’m okay but I already feel like I’m a loser. Tough times ahead. Two colleagues of my old company have given notice leaving two left to do the work of 5 workers.
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How Are You Feeling Right Now?
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Sorry @cymbele - that you're feeling this way, and it is understandable... (for you to feel a litte, "defeated.")
I know I always here when I am looking for work, that that in & of itself, is a job, or work.
Never really helps~!* / It sounds like, you got out, while the "gettin' was good!" or something like that - however that phrase goes
at your old co., there^ // Would be quite miserable to still be there now, maybe not in terms of security (financially) but w/respect to
your own sanity - from having to do so much extra work.
I know I always here when I am looking for work, that that in & of itself, is a job, or work.
Never really helps~!* / It sounds like, you got out, while the "gettin' was good!" or something like that - however that phrase goes
at your old co., there^ // Would be quite miserable to still be there now, maybe not in terms of security (financially) but w/respect to
your own sanity - from having to do so much extra work.
Been sitting in the hospital since 3am this morning 
Not psych, but the regular hospital. Every time I eat or drink, my stomach hurts, so I finally decided to go. I have Crohn's Disease so I'm used to this sort of thing, but it's been worse than usual lately. Catscan showed some inflammation, but nothing serious thankfully. I don't like hospitals much. Never did. But I suppose I can try to make it as comfortable as possible. Get some wi-fi going, read a book, watch a show...etc.
Not psych, but the regular hospital. Every time I eat or drink, my stomach hurts, so I finally decided to go. I have Crohn's Disease so I'm used to this sort of thing, but it's been worse than usual lately. Catscan showed some inflammation, but nothing serious thankfully. I don't like hospitals much. Never did. But I suppose I can try to make it as comfortable as possible. Get some wi-fi going, read a book, watch a show...etc.
Been sitting in the hospital since 3am this morning Not psych, but the regular hospital. Every time I eat or drink, my stomach hurts, so I finally decided to go. I have Crohn's Disease so I'm used to this sort of thing, but it's been worse than usual lately. Catscan showed some inflammation, but nothing serious thankfully. I don't like hospitals much. Never did. But I suppose I can try to make it as comfortable as possible. Get some wi-fi going, read a book, watch a show...etc.
Not psych, but the regular hospital. Every time I eat or drink, my stomach hurts, so I finally decided to go. I have Crohn's Disease so I'm used to this sort of thing, but it's been worse than usual lately. Catscan showed some inflammation, but nothing serious thankfully. I don't like hospitals much. Never did. But I suppose I can try to make it as comfortable as possible. Get some wi-fi going, read a book, watch a show...etc.
💕
Tbh I have enjoyed the occasional glass of wine every once in a while like every month or so, but my mother sent me a post on social media yesterday that had me thinking. It said no amount of alcohol is harmless.
Realistically, if it is harmful to you when you arent 18 yet, it wont magically un-harmful after that yea?! It shouldnt have been legal to anyone regardless of age to begin with.
Realistically, if it is harmful to you when you arent 18 yet, it wont magically un-harmful after that yea?! It shouldnt have been legal to anyone regardless of age to begin with.
Hugs to you Lane
I feel tired and vulnerable. Not in a good way. More like I feel like my defenses are down and my self destructive thoughts are having a field day.
I don’t feel suicidal because of my meds. I am sure I would without them. I have experienced this when I randomly decided to unilaterally stop one of them; it took about 3 days for me to get so bad that I was in the planning stage of a suicide attempt. Going back on the med resolved it. So, it’s kind of weird to be such a different person on medication vs off.
But whatever, I still have thoughts that I would rather be dead, and I am not looking forward to getting older. I am already past 45 and age discrimination is a thing. Plus the accumulation of medical issues.
I’m not so out of it, though, that I want to destroy myself. I’m trying to worry less, and think more about how I can be there for others in a positive way. I’m just lost.
I don’t feel suicidal because of my meds. I am sure I would without them. I have experienced this when I randomly decided to unilaterally stop one of them; it took about 3 days for me to get so bad that I was in the planning stage of a suicide attempt. Going back on the med resolved it. So, it’s kind of weird to be such a different person on medication vs off.
But whatever, I still have thoughts that I would rather be dead, and I am not looking forward to getting older. I am already past 45 and age discrimination is a thing. Plus the accumulation of medical issues.
I’m not so out of it, though, that I want to destroy myself. I’m trying to worry less, and think more about how I can be there for others in a positive way. I’m just lost.
Go figure, I slept the whole night through in the hospital, but I haven't been able to sleep more than 2-3 hours at a time at home. Now I wonder if it's just the environment that frightens me, maybe, since I don't feel that same fear elsewhere.
My mother is worried because I can't eat solid food yet. She's acting like I'm going to die, which no doubt has destroyed my mood also. "How long can you survive without food?" she asks me. Long enough that not eating for a few days won't hurt me. They're keeping me on liquids for now so that eating doesn't cause me more pain. It's not about dying. I'm going to be fine and eat again eventually. This is just the standard treatment for a Crohn's flare up. My grandmother couldn't eat when she died so now my mom is using that situation to worry about mine. But it's not the same. Whatever I say doesn't matter though. She still goes on worrying and doesn't listen. I wish I could just be calm enough about it for the both of us, but it's hard.
My mother is worried because I can't eat solid food yet. She's acting like I'm going to die, which no doubt has destroyed my mood also. "How long can you survive without food?" she asks me. Long enough that not eating for a few days won't hurt me. They're keeping me on liquids for now so that eating doesn't cause me more pain. It's not about dying. I'm going to be fine and eat again eventually. This is just the standard treatment for a Crohn's flare up. My grandmother couldn't eat when she died so now my mom is using that situation to worry about mine. But it's not the same. Whatever I say doesn't matter though. She still goes on worrying and doesn't listen. I wish I could just be calm enough about it for the both of us, but it's hard.
I know. I can't really be mad at her about it, but it's also destroying my mood at the same time. This is like the 10th time this has happened to me and I know by now that nothing horrible is going to happen. I just wish she would listen to me. I feel bad that she's worrying so much also. My doctors are still looking for a good treatment for me to prevent this from happening every time. That's why I'm getting all these tests done. But bottom line is Crohn's can't be cured. I've learned to live with my symptoms, and yes, once in while I end up in the ER, but that's no reason to worry or be in a sour mood. It just is. I guess maybe I've had more of a chance to accept my illness than she's had
