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How Are You Feeling Right Now?
- Thread starter UNREGISTERED0000
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Stuck. Stuck in my despair, my bitterness, my sorrow. Stuck in a body that has failed me at every turn. Stuck in a never-ending cycle of doing the same thing at the same time and place. Stuck in idle suicidal ideation. Imprisoned in a mind that neither improves nor deteriorates but merely suffers for the sake of suffering. That’s enough, I suppose.
Do you believe you should or need to suffer? That’s one of the most common symptoms of clinical depression, aka MDD.
Like you, I felt imprisoned by my pain. Somehow I stumbled bass-ackwards into a way to get out. At least for now. I think there’s always a chance if we never give up, meaning, take the option fully off the table. This is a song title, but it helped me through some dark places - “I believe in your victory.”
Like you, I felt imprisoned by my pain. Somehow I stumbled bass-ackwards into a way to get out. At least for now. I think there’s always a chance if we never give up, meaning, take the option fully off the table. This is a song title, but it helped me through some dark places - “I believe in your victory.”
I’m not familiar enough with your history, so I’m just speaking from my own perspective, which may or may not resonate with you.
By the time I am truly in need of calling a crisis line, it is too late; I would no longer have the presence of mind. Why would I call someone to talk me down from the only possible exit from unbearable suffering? This means I have to call someone, doesn’t need to be a crisis line, but a friend or relative who understands. This might not be an option.
If you do call the crisis line, it is ideal to find out if they can have you “sectioned,” meaning they send the cops out to get you to a psych hospital involuntarily. Some will call the cops if you say the wrong thing, but others will tell you up front that they only make suggestions, and you choose to use them or not. Hoping for the best for you.
By the time I am truly in need of calling a crisis line, it is too late; I would no longer have the presence of mind. Why would I call someone to talk me down from the only possible exit from unbearable suffering? This means I have to call someone, doesn’t need to be a crisis line, but a friend or relative who understands. This might not be an option.
If you do call the crisis line, it is ideal to find out if they can have you “sectioned,” meaning they send the cops out to get you to a psych hospital involuntarily. Some will call the cops if you say the wrong thing, but others will tell you up front that they only make suggestions, and you choose to use them or not. Hoping for the best for you.
I’m feeling upset, and I think I’m upset over something that I should be upset about. I care about human rights and the rule of law. The rule of law means laws apply to everyone, not just people below a certain level of socioeconomic status.
In other words, I care about people I’ve never met, because I’m human and that’s how we fucking survived in the savanna before farming was invented.
I saw something in the news that violates this sense of freedom; i.e., living in a country where due process and rights of citizens are respected just as much as those who control large bodies of men with guns and black vans. I am not going into the story because it might be too much for some readers, but if you have checked the news today, it should be pretty clear which story I am referring to.
In other words, I care about people I’ve never met, because I’m human and that’s how we fucking survived in the savanna before farming was invented.
I saw something in the news that violates this sense of freedom; i.e., living in a country where due process and rights of citizens are respected just as much as those who control large bodies of men with guns and black vans. I am not going into the story because it might be too much for some readers, but if you have checked the news today, it should be pretty clear which story I am referring to.
In the beginning, I thought I should suffer, but now it almost seems like a necessity, or rather a coping mechanism. It somewhat makes the way that I am more bearable, as if punishing myself is somehow taking responsibility, although in reality I’m doing the opposite.
I’m glad to hear that you’ve stumbled out of the dark. I never mentioned how helpful it was counting backwards from 500 by 7 during those dreaded sleepless nights last Summer, which you suggested that I do. Also, reading before bed (another of your suggestions) gave me something to look forward to every night and added some structure to my nightly routine. Regrettably, I fell out of the habit, but not for long.
I’ll check out that song. Thanks for sharing.
I’m glad to hear that you’ve stumbled out of the dark. I never mentioned how helpful it was counting backwards from 500 by 7 during those dreaded sleepless nights last Summer, which you suggested that I do. Also, reading before bed (another of your suggestions) gave me something to look forward to every night and added some structure to my nightly routine. Regrettably, I fell out of the habit, but not for long.
I’ll check out that song. Thanks for sharing.
confused, overwhelmed, on the verge of a really really mega embarrassing Moaning Myrtle esque very loud very visceral crying spell in public if i am in public for more than 10 minutes or so, the police vehicles are SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO embarrassing
thinking to myself the reason I find therapy in general cringe is because it never actually works, I get the vaguest advice ever, sometimes it triggers me even more,
at some point i really need to somehow look for pills to lobotomise me and turn me into my ideal self. i dont care if i risk dying prematurely because of addiction. life is too painful.
gender reassignment services are a joke
I DONT EVEN TYPE/WRITE/SPEAK LIKE A MALE ENOUGH I ALWAYS SOUND LIKE A FUCKING WOMAN
thinking to myself the reason I find therapy in general cringe is because it never actually works, I get the vaguest advice ever, sometimes it triggers me even more,
at some point i really need to somehow look for pills to lobotomise me and turn me into my ideal self. i dont care if i risk dying prematurely because of addiction. life is too painful.
gender reassignment services are a joke
I DONT EVEN TYPE/WRITE/SPEAK LIKE A MALE ENOUGH I ALWAYS SOUND LIKE A FUCKING WOMAN
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Thanks for your message. I call the crisis line precisely for them to talk me down from the only choice Im feeling is an option at that point.
I call the Samaritans in the UK, they do not break confidently or call anyone to come get you unless you pass out/ unconscious. Apart from knowing your telephone number, they wont know where you are anyway. They are pro life but also pro choice. It was good to talk to them about it without fear that you might get locked up. But in the UK its difficult to get sectioned anyway, even if you wanted too.
I call the Samaritans in the UK, they do not break confidently or call anyone to come get you unless you pass out/ unconscious. Apart from knowing your telephone number, they wont know where you are anyway. They are pro life but also pro choice. It was good to talk to them about it without fear that you might get locked up. But in the UK its difficult to get sectioned anyway, even if you wanted too.