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How Are You Feeling Right Now?

I'm really wanting to go for a run but my knees haven't recovered yet from my last run, so was wanting to do some weights, but my shoulder hasn't recovered from my last session a few months ago and I trapped a bloody nerve in my arm the other day just by pushing down on my elbows when typing on my computer!

Going to a kind to myself and get some chocolate I think and do some drawing.
 
@Inastorm Today was a 6 mile run. I'm feeling a wee bit tired now but having breakfast and coffee will help. I am glad you are being kind to yourself. What kind of chocolate?
6 mile run, that's good. I got myself a smallish Easter egg, which contains these small caramel chocolate bits. It's the kind of milk chocolate I don't eat very often. I prefer dark chocolate 70 to 85%, where I have a small bit most days.

Will you have a chocolate Easter egg?
 

LumberJack

Huggy Bear 🐻 u r warned!
SF Supporter
I'm reading about the reward and punish culture at the moment...
Interesting, I’m curious to know what you are reading, if you’re willing to share. I have done a lot of thinking about criminal justice reform, and so I like to look at how different cultures address what I would call wrongdoing. I remember hearing in my high school history class that when the Puritans arrived to make a settlement in America, the very first thing they did was to build a prison. I thought that was pretty pessimistic to predict that they would be slapping their own people in jail right away.

I’m also opposed to the so-called war on drugs because I don’t think that society should use the criminal justice system to address addiction, which is the main driver of demand for street drugs. No demand, no drug dealers, hence no supply would be imported.

Punishment makes utterly no sense. It’s a public health issue in aggregate, and a literal medical issue for the individual. This all assumes that the war on drugs is actually about addiction. In reality it was launched by conservatives to give the Nixon administration a basis for directing the FBI to investigate and infiltrate civil rights groups and hippies. In other words, it is really meant as a tool of oppression, but pretending that it is about stopping illegal drugs is politically expedient. 😕
 

Lane

SF Pro
SF Supporter
I'm really wanting to go for a run but my knees haven't recovered yet from my last run, so was wanting to do some weights, but my shoulder hasn't recovered from my last session a few months ago and I trapped a bloody nerve in my arm the other day just by pushing down on my elbows when typing on my computer!

Going to a kind to myself and get some chocolate I think and do some drawing.
Enjoy inastorm. Hope you feel 100% soon.
 
Interesting, I’m curious to know what you are reading, if you’re willing to share. I have done a lot of thinking about criminal justice reform, and so I like to look at how different cultures address what I would call wrongdoing. I remember hearing in my high school history class that when the Puritans arrived to make a settlement in America, the very first thing they did was to build a prison. I thought that was pretty pessimistic to predict that they would be slapping their own people in jail right away.

I’m also opposed to the so-called war on drugs because I don’t think that society should use the criminal justice system to address addiction, which is the main driver of demand for street drugs. No demand, no drug dealers, hence no supply would be imported.

Punishment makes utterly no sense. It’s a public health issue in aggregate, and a literal medical issue for the individual. This all assumes that the war on drugs is actually about addiction. In reality it was launched by conservatives to give the Nixon administration a basis for directing the FBI to investigate and infiltrate civil rights groups and hippies. In other words, it is really meant as a tool of oppression, but pretending that it is about stopping illegal drugs is politically expedient. 😕
Totally agree that the courts get choked up with unnecessary cases where people are given punishments that just doesn't work, you just get fuller prisons.

The book I'm listening to, is the courage to be disliked. It's a psychology book using the work of Alfred Alder. It tells the story of a youth and a philosopher having a discussion about life. Alder never agreed with punishment and reward, it's interesting as the reward element is complex too when you start thinking about it.

I did a drawing earlier and I wanted to send a picture of it to my sister, not to share the moment. I think I was looking for her you say, 'thats good, some kind of acknowledgement that the picture wasn't rubbish. And then I thought, why do I need someone to say that, I like it, that should be enough.
 

KM76710

Kangaroo Manager
SF Pro
SF Supporter
I'm really wanting to go for a run but my knees haven't recovered yet from my last run, so was wanting to do some weights, but my shoulder hasn't recovered from my last session a few months ago and I trapped a bloody nerve in my arm the other day just by pushing down on my elbows when typing on my computer!

Going to a kind to myself and get some chocolate I think and do some drawing.
Chocolate is one of those things I can always go for. :)
 
In short ( aka TL;DR version) - please be gentle with yourself.

Why:
My prior therapist did a ton of work with me over shame, because I had internalized the blame that my caretakers would put on me for all the problems in the house. Per her, there is toxic shame and healthy shame. Healthy shame inhibits anti-social behaviors, for example theft, taking credit for someone else's work, or calling someone a poopy-head in public. I think healthy shame is sorely, sorely lacking in both the political and business arenas, but that's just me.

Toxic shame, by contrast, causes us to doubt and punish ourselves. It is more a tendency to identify with regrettable behavior and to internalize negative messages we received during times when we were vulnerable. This differs from the traditional distinction of shame vs guilt. IMHO guilt is a matter of fact. Either I did something or I didn't. Shame is the value judgment around whether what we did is morally wrong, which can either lead to us taking a different approach next time, or in the toxic case, lead us to hate and punish ourselves.

I am arguing that the most appropriate way to cope with shame is to make what reparations you can without causing further harm to yourself or others. This may or may not be possible, but either way we can acknowledge that we made a mistake ("I f*cked up") without deciding that we are a mistake ("I am a f*ckup"). With this awareness we can resolve to handle similar situations better going forward. I know society uses an enormous amount of toxic shame to push unhealthy behaviors into the shadows, but I think that this punishment mentality is toxic in more ways than one.
Thank you for your well thought out reply, and you’re right. I’ve taken some action in helping to improve the final appearance of the stretch marks, i.e., retinol/hyaluronic acid moisturizer, as staring at them helplessly wasn’t doing me favors. I suppose we’re most vulnerable to (toxic) shame when we want to feel differently. My mind plays out all the times I’ve been humiliated and turns to all my insecurities as a means to keep me in my place.
 

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