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How Are You Feeling Right Now?

LumberJack

Huggy Bear 🐻 u r warned!
SF Supporter
Short version is I am in my new little house after a day of issues accompanying certain people coming to loggerheads and a not nice drama scene. But prior to that I did get lots of help from others. Not sure how I am feeling as moving is overwhelming even without the inter-personal distreas.
On the positive side the place is so nice, and by this time tomorrow I'll be done unpacking.
Wow! Sorry about the drama, and I know how moving is stressful in the best of circumstances. To be fair I've never experienced ideal residence-changing processes and I suspect no one else has, either, except those who are so wealthy that they can just pay other people to do it for them.

The important part is that you are moved and unpacking! Also the place is nice and will probably be better than the painful situation you're leaving. IDK about you but that point where I've got enough unpacked to manage the next 24 hours, namely enough kitchen stuff to cook and eat one time, a day of clothing, and enough of the bathroom to cover personal daily use products such as toilet paper, some lotion, and toothpaste, is when I collapse. I hope you're able to rest a bit soon! :) *hug
 

LumberJack

Huggy Bear 🐻 u r warned!
SF Supporter
Today has been full of panic. The lesion my my tongue is much worse now. It is painful to eat.

I have an appointment on Friday to see an oral surgeon. I don't even know if that is the right kind of doctor for this. I also don't know if my ride will be well enough to take me.
Ahhhh! I am very worried about this. It's only Monday and you have to limp along until Friday? Did they say anything to use for the pain like local anesthetic, or what to eat (I'm guessing spicy is entirely off the table right now) that wouldn't make the pain even worse? And then your ride is iffy. Do you have Lyft as a backup option just in case, or is this another office that is too far away to make that practical?

Also if you'd rather not go through my little questionnaire, I totally understand. This is just how I react to scary things like this; I want to understand as much info as I can. Pls disregard if I'm being a PITA :D
At the same time, I am sending my wishes for the pain to be eased and for your ride to come thru for you. *brohug
 
Funny but I am a just a little bit lonely even though I am distancing myself from two individuals. The needy one I lied to -yes I admit I feel guilty about it -and told the person I wanted to be a hermit for now. He's the depressing one. The other that is very critical of me has reached out through texts but probably hasn't noticed that I haven't responded in kind. They are the two major people that I used to consider friends but it's time for a break. I came dangerously close to telling my sister who is the closest of all the siblings - that she was very close to being distanced by me but I think she felt the change as I haven't been calling to chat as much as I have before..

I've kept myself busy and engaged but at night is when I feel the pressure of the loneliness creeping in. Of course it is night time when I write this. lol
 

LumberJack

Huggy Bear 🐻 u r warned!
SF Supporter
I'm feeling concernedly numb. This is the phase where that song lyric "I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all," feels more true than anything. Of course, when I'm in pain I'd rather be numb, go figure. But I have no clue what to do because I'm flat out of motivation. I've got breathing handled because that's involuntary and trying to eat and stay hydrated despite losing touch with thirst and hunger sensations. More so with thirst but I also feel like eating is too much effort atm.

I know that the term "ambivalent" means pulled in both directions if you pull apart the root components. When I use that I mean that I'm unable to decide something because both options are too important for me to give one up in favor of the other. This, however, is impossible and I know this. The thing is whether I go right or left, I'm not going left or right, respectively, and that is agonizing.

At the moment, it's instead more like I could not care less about going left, right, up, down, inward, or outward. Whichever takes the least effort i guess. So this is apathy with a connotation of nihilism, but I don't have a word for that off the top of my head. Nap time, I guess, lol.
 

Windhover

meandering home
SF Supporter
Thank you @SillyOldBear . I hope so too.

IDK about you but that point where I've got enough unpacked to manage the next 24 hours, namely enough kitchen stuff to cook and eat one time, a day of clothing, and enough of the bathroom to cover personal daily use products such as toilet paper, some lotion, and toothpaste, is when I collapse. I hope you're able to rest a bit soon! :)*hug
@LumberJack you described the point and my body's current state 'to a T.' I was busy until about 3 pm and then full stop.

Thank you!
I like it very much @may71
 

Angie

Admin
SF Author
SF Supporter
Ahhhh! I am very worried about this. It's only Monday and you have to limp along until Friday? Did they say anything to use for the pain like local anesthetic, or what to eat (I'm guessing spicy is entirely off the table right now) that wouldn't make the pain even worse? And then your ride is iffy. Do you have Lyft as a backup option just in case, or is this another office that is too far away to make that practical?

Also if you'd rather not go through my little questionnaire, I totally understand. This is just how I react to scary things like this; I want to understand as much info as I can. Pls disregard if I'm being a PITA :D
At the same time, I am sending my wishes for the pain to be eased and for your ride to come thru for you. *brohug
I think sticking to soft foods is the answer. Uber is an option although an expensive one. Another option is a taxi through my insurance, although taxis scare me silly (I know that makes little sense). I am thinking of going to my dentist today (Tuesday) and see what he says. The dentist office is just a block away and I can walk. I'll also have to decide today or tomorrow morning about the taxi, as they require 72 hours notice.

It isn't helping that I have such brain fog, probably from the Latuda and buspar I am taking.

Actually, thanks for prodding me to think this through. It is helpful :)
 

Lane

SF Pro
SF Supporter
Short version is I am in my new little house after a day of issues accompanying certain people coming to loggerheads and a not nice drama scene. But prior to that I did get lots of help from others. Not sure how I am feeling as moving is overwhelming even without the inter-personal distreas.
On the positive side the place is so nice, and by this time tomorrow I'll be done unpacking.
So glad you're in your new place @Windhover. A fresh start. Wishing you much joy and peace
 

Windhover

meandering home
SF Supporter
@Lane I empathize with you in the feeling sad about it when your youngster is working but up against hard times. My son is under a lot of stress right now too.

Thank you and everyone for the well wishes on the new place. It is still messy and unorganized, and some things seem to have gone missing.
However, with the way Sunday went, I am grateful for things not ending up much worse. My daughter's partner is an aggressive, arrogant bigot. Very hard - no - impossible for me to be around someone like that.
 
I'm feeling good. I've visited my mom for a week (which made her very happy) and I got back home last Sunday. I still have one week of holidays, which means I am truly alone and unbothered. I'm not very interested in social stuff and people in general, but these days it's especially true. I have many things to do, mind you, but none of them involve people, which makes me feel free, motivated and quiet. Quiet, in a world that can't stop talking.
 

AvidFan

Retired Cat Staff
SF Supporter
I am a bit better today. Inspired by @Windhover and the move, I imagined some joy that could be had by letting go of difficult situations and moving. There are no easy options right now but I've had the option of something different from self destruction finally present itself to my consciousness. It might have been incubating all this time, but since the idea popped into my skull, I've felt lighter and more optimistic. Getting rid of a house at my age is a precarious move. But trying to hold on to a crumbling pile of crap feels just as precarious. I've not made any decisions, but I have food for thought. Thank you @Windhover and I wish for you much happiness and contentment in your new place. I knew you could do it! ❤️
 

AvidFan

Retired Cat Staff
SF Supporter
Feeling a bit deflated. I mentioned my idea to a colleague and they proceeded to give me a run down of why it couldn't possibly work. My mind is enough of a negative Nancy, thanks, it shoots down most ideas I have and says "there's no point," "It won't work", "you'll fail". For once I could see a chink of light in my future, I could even see myself still existing, and someone proceeded to shoot it down. ☹️ It was the idea, it was the fact I could have a positive idea again FFS. What is wrong with people?
 

LumberJack

Huggy Bear 🐻 u r warned!
SF Supporter
Feeling a bit deflated. I mentioned my idea to a colleague and they proceeded to give me a run down of why it couldn't possibly work. My mind is enough of a negative Nancy, thanks, it shoots down most ideas I have and says "there's no point," "It won't work", "you'll fail". For once I could see a chink of light in my future, I could even see myself still existing, and someone proceeded to shoot it down. ☹️ It was the idea, it was the fact I could have a positive idea again FFS. What is wrong with people?
Some people will be negative about anyone else's idea. Does this person have any particular knowledge and expertise that you lack which is relevant? If not - it's probably not wise to let them discourage you. I'm not saying plow full speed ahead regardless of it being foolhardy or not; there are enough people out there who do this and I find that destructive. What I am saying is to consider the source... if this person is not qualified to advise it's better to get another opinion. Even if they are, it's still better to get another opinion. Just my 0.02
 

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