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How Are You Feeling Right Now?
- Thread starter UNREGISTERED0000
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I've come down from crisis mode, I've managed to get rid of the roofers, pay them, now I just have to see what happens when it rains next. I've installed a few more software on the new laptop, including my VPN, and even did a couple of hours' work. I need to settle for the evening and get off screens for a bit. I'm still feeling exhausted but not quite as broken - for now, anyway.
Two stressors.
First like AvidFan am entertaining three quotes to replace a fence which some kids took down part of. It is presently 52 feet long and all three companies are quoting 50 feet. What good is it having a two foot gap if I wanted to keep an animal like a dog in?!?? And average price, again, not as bad as a roof, is $2500 for the inadequate job!
secondly I had to go back to my ex for some machining of some metal parts for some woodworking equipment. This is going to cost me not only money which is minimal at worst but nightmares for a few weeks. But I don't know who else can do the work! So I swallowed my pride and asked. He said no to the money but that was before he realized the enormity of the task. But it will serve me well once it's done.
First like AvidFan am entertaining three quotes to replace a fence which some kids took down part of. It is presently 52 feet long and all three companies are quoting 50 feet. What good is it having a two foot gap if I wanted to keep an animal like a dog in?!?? And average price, again, not as bad as a roof, is $2500 for the inadequate job!
secondly I had to go back to my ex for some machining of some metal parts for some woodworking equipment. This is going to cost me not only money which is minimal at worst but nightmares for a few weeks. But I don't know who else can do the work! So I swallowed my pride and asked. He said no to the money but that was before he realized the enormity of the task. But it will serve me well once it's done.
Reasonable. My toilet went wrong again. Flushed and then water kept coming into the bowl and the tank wasn't filling. Fiddled around and it worked again. It did this the other day in the middle of the roofing chaos, thought it was a one off. It was also potentially continuing to fill the other day presenting a possible flood risk. On this sort of thing I've at least got a contract with a big plumbing corp so I just go online and book a slot and they come out and sort it - no costs, no worry they're incompetent or crooks. My insurance will go up again but that's a fight for another day. I've booked them in and will try to get on with my Sunday.
Sorry you're going through this. My sister cut me off years ago and I sent her letters asking her why she wouldn't speak to me and that I loved her. I found out she threw them out without reading them. Years later I didn't have the heart to forgive, and there's more to the story. But I understand the intense feelings of being cut off by someone. There's shock, then disbelief and grief. Then acceptance. It takes a while. I hope that you will be gentle with yourself Inastorm and even more so that the special person in your life will come around. How are you doing today? 
I found a forum for parents/grandparents of estranged children. I'm just browsing it for now because I'm still hoping for a reconciliation even though it's been 9 months and I haven't met my grandson yet. I'll continue to send cards and gifts through my son until my daughter refuses them, if that happens. I have pictures of her and one of him in my living room. My fiance was saying that she's still stuck (for lack of a better word) at the point of when she was mad at me. I hope she can move past it. I feel like she's getting older (30) and we can be grown when now.
Thanks for your message @Lane. I'm a bit better today - I got a bit of a stock yesterday as emotionally I found myself losing control at one point and I was putting myself at risk. I phoned a crisis phone line and was on the phone to them for 90 mins, which helped a lot.
I had nightmares again last night and found it difficult to get up. But Im going for a walk today and Ill take it easy. I found a good journal website online and wrote 1500 words about yesterdays chaos, which was good.
You yourself sound like your going through a rough time with your daughter, which must be extremely difficult too, especially where you haven't met your grand child. Take care.
I had nightmares again last night and found it difficult to get up. But Im going for a walk today and Ill take it easy. I found a good journal website online and wrote 1500 words about yesterdays chaos, which was good.
You yourself sound like your going through a rough time with your daughter, which must be extremely difficult too, especially where you haven't met your grand child. Take care.
Two forms of paralysis today.
all the quotes for the fence are about the same. Now I have to make a decision which I am not good at. Basically caught between not wanting to pay for it and wanting the most expensive fence if I have to get one. I guess it’s a good decision to have to make.
the other thing that happened today is I was shown a option for a job in the same company and asked if I wanted it. No one else wants the job neither do I but I am low on workload. So I (hopefully) politely declined hoping I don’t get laid off again because I don’t want the job. I tried to explain that I would not be a good fit for the position because of the company’s needs but I really don’t want the job. I hope that I dont get laid off but I am 5 months away from retirement so maybe it doesn’t matter. But I would like to be on good terms.
all the quotes for the fence are about the same. Now I have to make a decision which I am not good at. Basically caught between not wanting to pay for it and wanting the most expensive fence if I have to get one. I guess it’s a good decision to have to make.
the other thing that happened today is I was shown a option for a job in the same company and asked if I wanted it. No one else wants the job neither do I but I am low on workload. So I (hopefully) politely declined hoping I don’t get laid off again because I don’t want the job. I tried to explain that I would not be a good fit for the position because of the company’s needs but I really don’t want the job. I hope that I dont get laid off but I am 5 months away from retirement so maybe it doesn’t matter. But I would like to be on good terms.
All is more or less really running good - but I am ashamed, that I need to see the doctor today to get medication for my 4 weeks in Africa. I really try hard now - during this vacation to get off it (or at least reduce it substantially). I hate this. But if the power stays I have for the moment, it might work. And my wife takes care of me (kicks my ass). Have to walk every day 20 KM in 40 degrees, no food (only juice and tea) - I am sure even if I reduce I will sleep well. Wish me luck. I want all this to end - getting to old for this shit - depression, suicide ideas - what the heck? I have enough income, a small apartment on both sides (EU and AFR) and the nicest woman you can find. So...? I must be stupid.