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How Are You Feeling Right Now?
- Thread starter UNREGISTERED0000
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I’m feeling okay. I can tell that my meds are the primary factor, because I can sense my depression is still there, but I’m buffered from it and I’m able to function and think about plans more than 30 minutes in advance.
However, I’m clearly a bit wonky still, as evidenced by my elaborate run-on sentences. 😆
However, I’m clearly a bit wonky still, as evidenced by my elaborate run-on sentences. 😆
Tired. It's 11.48pm and I've been working since 9am, on and off. Got a lot done. I got my application in the other day but not heard anything yet. Not sure I expect to. I've still got enough work to keep me going until Doomsday anyway, clearly. The emails and reschedules are just one part of it. I managed to do some more predictable stuff until more unpredictable stuff came up.... I've carved out an extra day off over Easter so at least that's 5 days off to look forward to/survive until 🤯
Sad. On many levels. Seems like me, my neighbors, my friends, relatives, complete strangers, city, state, country, are all in decline right now and I don’t see things getting better before they get worse. It’s an okay type of sadness, because who wouldn’t be sad about all that, I mean, what kind of amoral, self absorbed, and utterly detached moron would look at this dumpster fire of a fucking timeline, and think, “wow, this is really good!”
The problem with compassion is that it hurts. A lot, and it’s almost constant. It’s kind of a side effect of caring about others: you see them hurt themselves, and you get angry because, after all, this person is hurting someone you care about!
Combine that with empathy, and you have a recipe for a continually broken heart. I would still consider that healthy, and I would choose that over a blithe, forced positivity, because the former is real. I would rather have a broken heart, because, paradoxically, that means my heart is working.
The problem with compassion is that it hurts. A lot, and it’s almost constant. It’s kind of a side effect of caring about others: you see them hurt themselves, and you get angry because, after all, this person is hurting someone you care about!
Combine that with empathy, and you have a recipe for a continually broken heart. I would still consider that healthy, and I would choose that over a blithe, forced positivity, because the former is real. I would rather have a broken heart, because, paradoxically, that means my heart is working.
It sounds like you’re grieving. The way you handle grief is unique to the individual, but I can tell you that resisting the strong emotions is counterproductive.
When you lose a relationship, the grief of losing the person is compounded by the grief of also losing the relationship between you. The only thing that is universal in grief is, IMHO, that we need to be gentle with ourselves.
When you lose a relationship, the grief of losing the person is compounded by the grief of also losing the relationship between you. The only thing that is universal in grief is, IMHO, that we need to be gentle with ourselves.
i feel anxiety rising quickly. in 30 mins i have an assessment. i was fine with it... then i got 2 txt reminders, then an email reminder... now... i am watching the time click by n all i want to do is curl up n go to sleep. i am actually sick to my stomach right now (i am sure it is from anticipation)
Thanks for your message. I never thought of the compounded element of grief before in the way you describe. Your completely right. This person hasn't died, but I remember when I grieved for my dad, who did past away some time ago, it was him as a person I grieved as we didn't really have a close relationship. I do miss seeing him and speaking to him, but yes, completely different.