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How Are You Feeling Right Now?
- Thread starter UNREGISTERED0000
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Test and symptoms are unequivocal at 5.30am. This bug goes from zero to worrying in a short space of time. So I'll have to get up and fill in the triage form. I was supposed to see my physio today and give him a glowing report of my progress but that's all been tore down. The uti symptoms are massively irritating my pudendal neuralgia, which after 2 months of dedicated work, was starting to get better. 😳
Sorry that youre going through all thus with the UTI. I hope the sictors can find a solution. Sending luv back to you Avid. 
Imho, I don't think @LumberJack was saying that grief makes you a worse person, or less likeable, but rather different than you were before.
I think he's also definitely not saying you shouldn't be on this planet anymore.
I think he's also definitely not saying you shouldn't be on this planet anymore.
I feel ill and tired. Really not myself. I've had maybe 5 minutes sleep all week. There's a once in a lifetime sort of nearly full eclipse and I'm just not interested, when normally I would be. The stress of everything is making me sick. I might have to microwave a couple of things, eat and then go to bed.
@LumberJack no worries, I knew what your point was (hence me responding with, "I see your point.") There is still a part of me holding the nasty little piece of code which prompts me to use a bunch of multi-dimensional yardsticks which are strangely like those weird blue ocean polyps* assisting each other, made up of my husband's assessments of me. If you've gotten through that sentence, good on you and lol I've had some caffeine this morning.
As far as lost goes, lol yes and no because I enjoy words and enjoy yours as they are almost never in the 'style' of a wall of text. Lost can happen due to my own inner verbosity, loops, etc., as already mentioned.
Bluebottles if anyone from Oz is reading
Thanks @may71 for thinking of me.
As far as lost goes, lol yes and no because I enjoy words and enjoy yours as they are almost never in the 'style' of a wall of text. Lost can happen due to my own inner verbosity, loops, etc., as already mentioned.
Bluebottles if anyone from Oz is reading
Thanks @may71 for thinking of me.
Exhausted. I am sorry for the post I wrote in AYFST thread. I don't want to upset or worry anyone. I had some food. I just can't stop typing and thinking and asking AI questions about infections at the moment. It is quite funny how they behave differently - Google AI will say "that's sheer incompetence!" while ChatGPT will say things along the lines of "You don't actually know why they ordered this test maybe there is something in their clinical reasoning that made them think it was relevant". I feel like the latter is gaslighting me half the time. I will have to take some painkillers. I am worried this antibiotic won't work and I am going to end up in hospital when it spreads to my kidneys. I wouldn't actually mind if that happened and I didn't come out again, but there are some things I need to sort out first. I'm trying to hold on to get those loose ends sorted at least. Sorry I am going on again. A reflection of a mind that just will not shut up for a second.
I really feel sad and depleted, but I’m not as messed up by my psychiatric symptoms as I have been. It’s more like that when I think of what’s ahead of me to truly get my life reassembled, then I feel overwhelmed by the project.
I know that the way to eat an elephant is one bite at a time, supposedly meaning I could break the goal down to smaller pieces and just focus on making progress instead of scheduling a project mgt plan with a schedule and milestones before getting started.
I still feel a little skeptical that I have a chance of success. I am having trouble getting started because I am doomed to failure regardless of what I do. However, I can also see that it is a certain self-fulfilling prophecy if I believe it and just give up without trying. I believe that I can serve myself well by establishing better emotional stability as a first step. This is the current state of your tireless (lol j/k!
) author.
I know that the way to eat an elephant is one bite at a time, supposedly meaning I could break the goal down to smaller pieces and just focus on making progress instead of scheduling a project mgt plan with a schedule and milestones before getting started.
I still feel a little skeptical that I have a chance of success. I am having trouble getting started because I am doomed to failure regardless of what I do. However, I can also see that it is a certain self-fulfilling prophecy if I believe it and just give up without trying. I believe that I can serve myself well by establishing better emotional stability as a first step. This is the current state of your tireless (lol j/k!
) author.
My experience with those AI chat bots has significantly dimmed my view of LLM bots in general. I did get some good advice once when I searched on some digestive symptoms. Chat GPT threw out dairy intolerance as a possible cause so I switched to lactose free milk and things in that region are doing better.
This said, my hit rate with the bots is only 1 in 7-10 searches total. Then again, when I use the old fashioned way (search engine), I end up at the same 3 sites in which 2 have nothing relevant and only generic guidelines. The 3rd gets hits on various extremely rare conditions and that’s a recipe for anxiety with me.
In short, don’t believe the bots; they’re trained on internet posts. I think we both know how much accurate information is in the training data. I’m not saying it’s necessarily a bad idea, but instead, that a giant grain of salt is called for. When I have found myself in a similar situation with medical problems and anxiety over forward progression followed by backtracking, I have found that distraction is way better than trying to get more info on the given condition. That said, I think I am a world class shiny-thing chaser, so distraction is easy for me.
HTH!
This said, my hit rate with the bots is only 1 in 7-10 searches total. Then again, when I use the old fashioned way (search engine), I end up at the same 3 sites in which 2 have nothing relevant and only generic guidelines. The 3rd gets hits on various extremely rare conditions and that’s a recipe for anxiety with me.
In short, don’t believe the bots; they’re trained on internet posts. I think we both know how much accurate information is in the training data. I’m not saying it’s necessarily a bad idea, but instead, that a giant grain of salt is called for. When I have found myself in a similar situation with medical problems and anxiety over forward progression followed by backtracking, I have found that distraction is way better than trying to get more info on the given condition. That said, I think I am a world class shiny-thing chaser, so distraction is easy for me.
HTH!
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I wanted you to know that I have read this. I somehow missed it earlier this afternoon. I’m 80% confident it was a page refresh that should have happened but didn’t.
I didn’t notice that sentence until you called it out, lol. It takes a lot more than that to make me flinch at a run-on sentence! My thoughts are so all over the place and then branch off, only to reassemble in a different configuration later, that I actually find it easier to read when someone else writes along the same pattern.
I am glad you mentioned that you got my point. I was worried that I was inadvertently endorsing the idea that you don’t belong on this planet. I was quite intending to express the opposite! My recent depression flare up has cost me enough sleep that I feel like I’m missing 10-20 IQ points so I am doubting that I am coming across clearly, as well as that I am comprehending what I read accurately.
Doing better now, but I am far from caught up or back to my baseline at present.
I can empathize with the feeling of doubt about belonging on this planet, or even within the entire universe. I have felt that way for a very long time, starting at whatever age I started to have thoughts about belonging up until very recently, Through study and contemplation, though, I have come to a philosophical conclusion that the intuition is false. It doesn’t mean I don’t frequently revert to feelings of alienation from the entirety of existence, but when I do go there, I have a counter argument. I don’t know if that is relevant to what you are going through right now.
I also feel like I understand the imagery of multiple issues that reinforce each other and then gang up on an innocent person. I fervently wish that you can someday discard all of the shitty scripts your ex inculcated in you. It’s false! You didn’t deserve to be treated that way at all.
At the same time I also know how hard it is to jettison introjected scripts and beliefs that were installed by people who had power over us. I believe with all the certainty that I have about anything (aside from trigonometry, BTW) that it’s possible, even though I can’t say I’ve reached that point on my scripts.
I didn’t notice that sentence until you called it out, lol. It takes a lot more than that to make me flinch at a run-on sentence! My thoughts are so all over the place and then branch off, only to reassemble in a different configuration later, that I actually find it easier to read when someone else writes along the same pattern.
I am glad you mentioned that you got my point. I was worried that I was inadvertently endorsing the idea that you don’t belong on this planet. I was quite intending to express the opposite! My recent depression flare up has cost me enough sleep that I feel like I’m missing 10-20 IQ points so I am doubting that I am coming across clearly, as well as that I am comprehending what I read accurately.
Doing better now, but I am far from caught up or back to my baseline at present.
I can empathize with the feeling of doubt about belonging on this planet, or even within the entire universe. I have felt that way for a very long time, starting at whatever age I started to have thoughts about belonging up until very recently, Through study and contemplation, though, I have come to a philosophical conclusion that the intuition is false. It doesn’t mean I don’t frequently revert to feelings of alienation from the entirety of existence, but when I do go there, I have a counter argument. I don’t know if that is relevant to what you are going through right now.
I also feel like I understand the imagery of multiple issues that reinforce each other and then gang up on an innocent person. I fervently wish that you can someday discard all of the shitty scripts your ex inculcated in you. It’s false! You didn’t deserve to be treated that way at all.
At the same time I also know how hard it is to jettison introjected scripts and beliefs that were installed by people who had power over us. I believe with all the certainty that I have about anything (aside from trigonometry, BTW) that it’s possible, even though I can’t say I’ve reached that point on my scripts.
It’s just about midnight here and the intrusive thoughts seem to have come out from a dark alleyway carrying various types of blunt force weapons. It makes sense because they are big and also very stupid. I’m managing it for now so I’m not distressed. I still need to keep my guard up and question/refute them before I start believing them.
