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How Are You Feeling Right Now?

LumberJack

Huggy Bear 🐻 u r warned!
SF Supporter
Trying to get up, take 3. I definitely got some of my sleep debt cleared last night into this morning. It’s about 11:45 AM now so it’s almost afternoon. I went to bed about 12 hours ago, which is early for me since recently bedtime has been hovering around 2:00 AM.

I had some really good dreams last night. I don’t remember quite what the content was, but I feel like I had a dream about my partner. This was also what some of the tears were about last night. If that’s a connection then I would gladly cry every night if it meant dreaming about him.

Now, though, it’s hard to get moving. I keep wandering back into bed before I wake up all the way. 4 extra hours is a good start, but it’s way less than what I have missed in the past few nights.
 

AvidFan

Retired Cat Staff
SF Supporter
Starting to get scared again and my mood is dropping. Method is back on the table (not literally) but it just went from option 15 to option 10 in the latest shuffle. There are options before that. This is because the mighty NHS is proving completely incompetent at treating my UTI. It's already come back twice, now I'm about to finish the latest 7 day course and I feel I'm just going to get denied the correct treatment again. Rather than sufficiently treat my infection for 2 weeks, seems they would rather go for course after course after course of 7 days even though it relapses 4 days later (how this helps prevent antibiotic resistance is a complete logic FAIL). 7 years ago this happened 8 times and they still wouldn't change approach so I got grey net meds and guess what, 2 weeks of a stronger antibiotic got rid of it. Now looks like I will have to do this again. At least that's on the table before the method. But this shit is really enraging me. You'd think I was asking them for children's kidneys to cure me. They are ruining my life at the moment. I started off doing really well today and just got worn down by this.
 

Windhover

meandering home
SF Supporter
A case of nerves. Not surprised that anxiety has increased a lot today after last night/s mangled and interrupted sleep. I managed to get food shopping done, and I had a nice chat lol (there are some people who I feel comfortable taking with, and with others it's anathema) with a woman giving out samples of skin care product, so that was positive. if it cools down this evening maybe I can get out for a bit of walking or jogging as medication for this misery.
 

JanisSPK

Well-Known Member
It's all sinking in. The house energy is back to just mine and mine alone. that's all I need to say at the moment. Thank G-d for friend support and the people here that I also consider as friends. It's been plentiful and I can feel the love. I'm really displaced at this time. The pool party Saturday with the girls coming over for the afternoon is going to distract me and I'm going to try and have a really nice time. The prepping for it will be distracting as well

I'm also very very nervous about the brain scan tomorrow, thank you everyone for the supportive thoughts. I hate having to go do this kind of thing alone but it is what it is.
 

LumberJack

Huggy Bear 🐻 u r warned!
SF Supporter
I'm also very very nervous about the brain scan tomorrow, thank you everyone for the supportive thoughts. I hate having to go do this kind of thing alone but it is what it is.
I have never had a brain scan, but I do understand the importance of having a supportive person with you for medical care. I have had a couple issues that were scary for me, and luckily I didn’t have to go alone.

I wish you had someone else to go with you, but we must make do with the way things are right now, as you have noticed. I am wishing for the ordeal to be as smooth as possible, and that you’ll be glad it’s behind you afterward.
 

JanisSPK

Well-Known Member
I have never had a brain scan, but I do understand the importance of having a supportive person with you for medical care. I have had a couple issues that were scary for me, and luckily I didn’t have to go alone.

I wish you had someone else to go with you, but we must make do with the way things are right now, as you have noticed. I am wishing for the ordeal to be as smooth as possible, and that you’ll be glad it’s behind you afterward.
Thank you so very much LumberJack. I asked for this because my overt nursing focus wants to know why I broke through the focal petit mall seizure meds that had been working for 2 years had lost its strength and control 2 months ago. increase of meds resolved everything in 3 days but I want to know if changes have occurred in my brain. so it's my fault, lol
 

JanisSPK

Well-Known Member
Please feel free not to respond. It's just my thoughts about this.

Did someone ask you for a loan, and then you gave them a check? You might be able to get this back through the courts, but it's probably trickier if you didn't have a formal loan agreement.
I didn’t have a formal, it was the boyfriend over this last past year, needing auto repair and other things. There’s really no legal recourse. Just having to learn how to restrain my generosity etc. it still hits the pocket book very hard. Lessons are still needing to be learned. That’s not a surprise because we are wired to keep learning until our last breath if we choose….but my boundaries sure need to be reevaluated.
I wouldn’t legally try anything now anyway. It is my lesson to learn and it will be learned.
Thank you for your suggestion though. I should have done what you suggested.
 
I wouldn’t legally try anything now anyway.
Ok.
I should have done what you suggested.
I've been burned by friends before too. Hindsight is 20/20. I didn't mean to sound like I was suggesting that you should have done anything differently. I was just hoping there was a way you could get your money back if you had been inclined to go through a legal battle.

It would be nice if the people we call friends or partners could be trusted.
 

JanisSPK

Well-Known Member
Ok.

I've been burned by friends before too. Hindsight is 20/20. I didn't mean to sound like I was suggesting that you should have done anything differently. I was just hoping there was a way you could get your money back if you had been inclined to go through a legal battle.

It would be nice if the people we call friends or partners could be trusted.
🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽
 

LumberJack

Huggy Bear 🐻 u r warned!
SF Supporter
Starting to get scared again and my mood is dropping. Method is back on the table (not literally) but it just went from option 15 to option 10 in the latest shuffle. There are options before that. This is because the mighty NHS is proving completely incompetent at treating my UTI. It's already come back twice, now I'm about to finish the latest 7 day course and I feel I'm just going to get denied the correct treatment again. Rather than sufficiently treat my infection for 2 weeks, seems they would rather go for course after course after course of 7 days even though it relapses 4 days later (how this helps prevent antibiotic resistance is a complete logic FAIL). 7 years ago this happened 8 times and they still wouldn't change approach so I got grey net meds and guess what, 2 weeks of a stronger antibiotic got rid of it. Now looks like I will have to do this again. At least that's on the table before the method. But this shit is really enraging me. You'd think I was asking them for children's kidneys to cure me. They are ruining my life at the moment. I started off doing really well today and just got worn down by this.
That's terrible. I can understand why it's frustrating. Hell I would be thru the roof and go to whatever office I could get to and... probably get arrested for harassment, because I can generally express my anger with more volume than people are accustomed to, plus I can be very articulate when I'm pissed. Not trying to give you any ideas, ofc. *halo

Short of that, is there any possible escalation path? I am ofc ignorant of how the NHS functions, but I'm guessing there might be an office that you could approach to escalate your concerns re: your treatment being inadequate. Of course, they probably have a 5-week response time, anyway. I know what black market meds are (as in completely illegal), but I don't know what grey market is - is that like ordering from a foreign country without needing a prescription? But if it worked, and you know the seller is reputable, then why not?
 

LumberJack

Huggy Bear 🐻 u r warned!
SF Supporter
Ok.

I've been burned by friends before too. Hindsight is 20/20. I didn't mean to sound like I was suggesting that you should have done anything differently. I was just hoping there was a way you could get your money back if you had been inclined to go through a legal battle.

It would be nice if the people we call friends or partners could be trusted.
sorry to barge in here and philosophize, but that's what I do. I tried to resist, but failed.

If you're still reading, lol, this had me thinking. It seems like a monetary loan, especially a large one, changes relationship dynamics instantly, and usually some degree of acrimony results. I was, coincidentally, chatting with a friend about this last night - he said he has a policy that he never loans money to individuals. The main concern is a pair that were once equal, now have a power differential in that the debtor has an obligation to the creditor.

I know from past education and experience (from hearing other peoples' stories; I have not done this myself) that providing essential supplies like food or cash to a person who is financially struggling eventually results in the beneficiary resenting the benefactor and holding a grudge and/or blowing up the entire relationship. It's not a far stretch IMHO to imagine that a loan arrangement might induce similar issues. IDK, of course. These are just random thoughts and they are not developed yet. Maybe there's a field of study that includes relationship dynamics. What I know of psychology pretty much focuses on individuals' subjective experiences. Off the cuff, though, I would imagine interpersonal stuff to be an area within psychology.

In conclusion, If it's okay with you, @JanisSPK , I will learn from your mistake. This, with my background on others' experiences, suggests that I should never loan money to someone I love, just to be safe. Luckily, I'm currently worse than broke, so nobody's been reaching out to me recently.
 

LumberJack

Huggy Bear 🐻 u r warned!
SF Supporter
Thank you so very much LumberJack. I asked for this because my overt nursing focus wants to know why I broke through the focal petit mall seizure meds that had been working for 2 years had lost its strength and control 2 months ago. increase of meds resolved everything in 3 days but I want to know if changes have occurred in my brain. so it's my fault, lol
Honestly I know very little about seizures, except that certain anti-seizure meds also have a mood stabilizing effect. I'm on Lamotrigine, for example. I had another one earlier, V- something, but that did utterly nothing. Is it quite unusual for a seizure problem to have a "breakout" of symptoms, as in your case? What I'm wondering (since you mentioned your nursing background) is that maybe the body just changes over time requiring periodic medication evaluations.
 

AvidFan

Retired Cat Staff
SF Supporter
That's terrible. I can understand why it's frustrating. Hell I would be thru the roof and go to whatever office I could get to and... probably get arrested for harassment, because I can generally express my anger with more volume than people are accustomed to, plus I can be very articulate when I'm pissed. Not trying to give you any ideas, ofc. *halo

Short of that, is there any possible escalation path? I am ofc ignorant of how the NHS functions, but I'm guessing there might be an office that you could approach to escalate your concerns re: your treatment being inadequate. Of course, they probably have a 5-week response time, anyway. I know what black market meds are (as in completely illegal), but I don't know what grey market is - is that like ordering from a foreign country without needing a prescription? But if it worked, and you know the seller is reputable, then why not?
Thanks am getting there with the rage lol. Grey web is just like dark web but on surface web not requiring tor. Or there are even supposedly legitimate sites offering to sell antibiotics. Women here can go in a pharmacy, answer a few questions and get antibiotics. Fair enough. But as a male the options seem very limited and they will do just about anything rather than consider that maybe it's just a stubborn infection. Am already being escalated to frightening cancer pathways without even dealing with the damn uti first. Hey ho another advanced nurse in a hour. Still not seen a proper actual doctor.
 

LumberJack

Huggy Bear 🐻 u r warned!
SF Supporter
Thanks am getting there with the rage lol. Grey web is just like dark web but on surface web not requiring tor. Or there are even supposedly legitimate sites offering to sell antibiotics. Women here can go in a pharmacy, answer a few questions and get antibiotics. Fair enough. But as a male the options seem very limited and they will do just about anything rather than consider that maybe it's just a stubborn infection. Am already being escalated to frightening cancer pathways without even dealing with the damn uti first. Hey ho another advanced nurse in a hour. Still not seen a proper actual doctor.
That’s bizarre. Why the gender discrimination in prescriptions for antibiotics? I’m aware of the science around the idea of only using antibiotics when an infection is known for certain. Some people want antibiotics for every common cold or respiratory infection, which are viral about 99.9% of the time. And this is how we end up with antibiotic resistant bacteria.

You have a test strip, that I assume is proof positive of a UTI, so it’s appropriate to prescribe antibiotics barring any other complications. I’m wondering how the equipment between your legs factors into this decision. IIRC, women are more prone to UTIs by way of the geometric differences between male and female parts.

Still, once an infection is identified, what else could it be? I am just thinking in electronic words; please don’t feel pressured to answer this speculation, lol.
 
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