How do you get through a hopeless time?

[februaryfriday]

Basically, I've learned this week that when I apply for assistance (personal assistant, not monetary aid) I can't save more than a certain amount and my plan for private retirement provision is basically f'cked. (I'm in Germany, so any US-tips don't apply.) This is, by far, not the first time systemic ableism has shown it's ugly head but, oh boy, I'm all burned out. We just can't win. This, plus the fear of contracting Long Covid someday, plus being part of another marginalized group plus chronic pain just ... is getting me down. I'm already in therapy (2xmonth) and on antidepressants.

So how do you guys cope when stuff seems hopeless? My go-to is escapism but even that doesn't seem to be helping rn. I have stuff to look forward through (my 2nd niece is being born by the end of August and I'm moving into a nice flat by then) but right now, I don't know how to get through each day.
Take care

 

[PurpleWolf08]

Basically, I've learned this week that when I apply for assistance (personal assistant, not monetary aid) I can't save more than a certain amount and my plan for private retirement provision is basically f'cked. (I'm in Germany, so any US-tips don't apply.) This is, by far, not the first time systemic ableism has shown it's ugly head but, oh boy, I'm all burned out. We just can't win. This, plus the fear of contracting Long Covid someday, plus being part of another marginalized group plus chronic pain just ... is getting me down. I'm already in therapy (2xmonth) and on antidepressants.

So how do you guys cope when stuff seems hopeless? My go-to is escapism but even that doesn't seem to be helping rn. I have stuff to look forward through (my 2nd niece is being born by the end of August and I'm moving into a nice flat by then) but right now, I don't know how to get through each day.
Take care

Try to remember that there will come a time when the terrible stuff ends and things will start to look up. Tell your T how you feel. They may be able to help you better. Here if you need to talk.

 

[may71]

I'm in Germany

Is there any chance that you could retire outside of Germany? There are some places where you can live for pretty cheap, and you might be able to much more easily afford a personal assistant. Some of those places also have pretty good private healthcare.

 

[SamB]

When it seems hopeless then I try to just live in the moment and make the best of now.
If the future is worse and you can’t do anything about it then you just have to face that bridge when you come to it and take as much enjoyment from now as you can.

 

[Anchorchain]

When things have seemed hopeless for me, what keeps me going is, I tell myself......OK, I'm 90% used up, 90% of my personal inner resources have been beaten down by all the s**t that's been thrown my way......but I still have 10% left, I've still got 10% of my own personal chutzpah left to work with.......that'll be enough to get me through this hopeless zone and to the other side of it.

 

[may71]

There was a study of prisoners or war that found that the ones that survived had a common trait of having a dream. For example, one man made very detailed plans about the house he would build once he got free.

 

[februaryfriday]

Is there any chance that you could retire outside of Germany? There are some places where you can live for pretty cheap, and you might be able to much more easily afford a personal assistant. Some of those places also have pretty good private healthcare.

I mean I guess technically I could, but I don't want to leave my extended family/friends behind...

 

[may71]

There are some places that would be super cheap, but also have high airfares and travel time to and from Germany. I wonder if there would be a place close enough to allow you to visit often, but also cheap enough to give you a good standard of living.

Do you feel like frequent visits would be enough?

 

[PrincessPure]

Just lie in bed and binge watch stuff.