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Practical Advice I am a sick person?(weird dreams)

#1
I am a 19 yo, girl and a virgin. I have weird dreams all the time, that's why when i wake up i usually make a effort to not remember my dreams because they make me feel bad, but sometimes they are too shocking to me so i wake up thinking only about that, that was the case today.
See sometimes i have sex dreams, but they are never a pleasant thing to me, i consider myself asexual since i'm not interested on experience sex (i don't even enjoy kisses with people i feel attracted to)
Whatever these dreams make me feel super off, i oversleept today and i had an incestous one with a close family member wich i appreciate as an important person in my life but not that way, and it's not the first time it happens wich makes me worry a lot about my sanity, the worst thing is that the "me" of those dreams is enjoying it, making the real me very ashamed and disgusted, it already happened with another family member of the opposite sex (at first i thought i was bisexual so i'm not really surprised about gender) but ughhhhhh i literally wake up today with a taste in my mouth i had to clean with my courtain why does this keep happening to me? Does this mean anything?? I first searched for "weird sex dreams" on google but i didn't find anything like this... I had a dream of being raped by a stranger old man once and that feelt awful but i prefer that 1000 times than this. I'm a very suicidal person so anything that makes me feel like i don't worth enough makes a perfect excuse to go back to my destructive behaviour and that's what these dreams make me feel about me. I thought that maybe the fact that i spend the most time in my house with them and not really going outside (i work from home and i didn't hang out with my friends in a long time) could be the cause of this? Or i'm really just a pervert that needs to stop going to sleep at 5am and start taking my meds again. (Sorry if i mispelled something, i'm still learning english)
Any advice?
 
#2
Sorry that you're going through this
the worst thing is that the "me" of those dreams is enjoying it, making the real me very ashamed and disgusted
You're not in control of your dreams, so there is nothing to be ashamed of. Knowing that you can't control these things, maybe you can just observe them without making judgments about yourself
start taking my meds again
What were things like when you were taking medication? Did you have disturbing dreams then too?
going to sleep at 5am
If you can get onto a more reasonable sleep schedule, it might help a lot

You might want to try acupuncture and Chinese herbal medicine. From the perspective of traditional Chinese medicine, disturbing dreams and having a strong taste in your mouth are signs of a specific medical condition.

If feel that you are at risk for a suicide attempt, it might be best to go back on meds immediately.
 

JDot

J to the Dizzle O to the Tizzle
Forum Pro
SF Supporter
#3
Does this mean anything??
The thoughts going on in your head don't mean anything at all. You are not your mind. I kinda have a similar problem. A lot of times I have violent thoughts and images pop up in my head. Sometimes I'm afraid to be around sharp objects because I'll have this image in my head of me stabbing someone, which is something I would never do. With the help of therapy, I've learned that these are just thoughts and they don't mean anything. I still have these thoughts today, although not as much. And when I have these thoughts, I recognize it for what it is, just a stupid, meaningless thought. My advice is just tell yourself "It's just a stupid thought. It doesn't mean anything." And get used to saying that whenever you have these thoughts.
 

Walker

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ADMIN
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#4
You simply do not control your dreams and it doesn't make you sick or weird. Your brain is processing thoughts while you're asleep.
I know someone else (a family member of mine, in fact) who has had sexual dreams about all of us (and then tells us but that's another story) and when googling around about it found that it has something to do with seeking closeness and intimacy (platonic, I assume) with those people. So while you're viewing it just as "sex" it can also just mean 'closeness' and your brain doesn't know how else to "say" that to you while you're asleep. I'd venture to say the more it bothers you / the more you dwell on it, the more chance that you have of it occurring again, honestly.
 

Pixiebelle

Well-Known Member
#5
You are 19 yrs. old, you still view the world in rose colored lenses. A sex dream with your close family doesn’t mean that you want to. Thou, you enjoyed it on your dream doesn’t mean that it’s gonna be the same in real life. You have it right now, cause you latched on the nearest and safest person on your life. I think you are stressed being a lone virgin in your group. That desire manifested in your dream. It’s okay, you just learn to explore yourself. It’s embarrassing at first, but your not the only one who have those kind of dreams. I had talked with my cousins, aunts and uncles (those who are close to my age, back then) and friends. Not my parents or the old ones. They are not free thinkers,
You are still a virgin, nothing wrong with that.It’s okay to wait for the person that can help you enjoy sex the first time. In the meantime, expand your knowledge read and talk to people regardless their background in life. I once did a research paper on legalizing prostitution. One of my HS friend was a Madam. I‘m friends with mistresses of powerful people. So, to me when I lost my vCard, I’m prepared. I was in love with my ex bf, I made him wait for a year. With beach cottage backdrop in an exclusive resort. I was set, no I didn’t marry him. I’m too young, I was 25 then. And I just got a job that would take me to places around the world. I know this time is different losing their vCard as young as 12 yrs old due to peer pressure. But, hey your life and mind is your own. Just keep an open mind. And a whole lot of experiences awaits you. Take care!
 

Auri

🎸🎼Rock Star🎼🎸
Safety & Support
SF Supporter
#6
Don't worry about your dreams, weird sh*te happens there for everyone, but you should never interpret them on the first degree. Probably not even the second. I'm asexual too and have had plenty of dreams doing things I'd never consider in real life. Including incestuous dreams, but also much more plausible things such as having a baby (which I don't want irl). I'm weirded out or disgusted for a minute, but then I move on lol. I know what I want in real life. They're dreams, they really shouldn't make you feel so bad.
If they really bother you, I suggest you learn how to lucid dream, it's a very good tool to prevent you from having very weird dreams or unbearable nightmares. :)
 
#7
I am a 19 yo, girl and a virgin. I have weird dreams all the time, that's why when i wake up i usually make a effort to not remember my dreams because they make me feel bad, but sometimes they are too shocking to me so i wake up thinking only about that, that was the case today.
See sometimes i have sex dreams, but they are never a pleasant thing to me, i consider myself asexual since i'm not interested on experience sex (i don't even enjoy kisses with people i feel attracted to)
Whatever these dreams make me feel super off, i oversleept today and i had an incestous one with a close family member wich i appreciate as an important person in my life but not that way, and it's not the first time it happens wich makes me worry a lot about my sanity, the worst thing is that the "me" of those dreams is enjoying it, making the real me very ashamed and disgusted, it already happened with another family member of the opposite sex (at first i thought i was bisexual so i'm not really surprised about gender) but ughhhhhh i literally wake up today with a taste in my mouth i had to clean with my courtain why does this keep happening to me? Does this mean anything?? I first searched for "weird sex dreams" on google but i didn't find anything like this... I had a dream of being raped by a stranger old man once and that feelt awful but i prefer that 1000 times than this. I'm a very suicidal person so anything that makes me feel like i don't worth enough makes a perfect excuse to go back to my destructive behaviour and that's what these dreams make me feel about me. I thought that maybe the fact that i spend the most time in my house with them and not really going outside (i work from home and i didn't hang out with my friends in a long time) could be the cause of this? Or i'm really just a pervert that needs to stop going to sleep at 5am and start taking my meds again. (Sorry if i mispelled something, i'm still learning english)
Any advice?
Hey there
i also have really weird dreams, including sex dreams like you. I know that its sometimes hard to "snap back into reality" after a night of weird dreams but I wouldnt like take dreams literally. I talk a lot with my therapist about my dreams. I'd say they do have some message to convey about your subconcsiousness but I wouldnt take the dreams itself at face value. So having those dreams doesnt make you "sick".
 

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