I've been through just about every emotion from depressed, spented, to hopeful. I did everything that my doctor (psychiatrist) has suggested and even forced to help with the depression. I never accepted that I was depressed. I felt that I was just done. Treatement had failed and I didn't have anything else to spare. I stopped asking for help. Everything always ended in disappointment. I feel like a fool. I could have saved a lot of money and time that was spent on me. I caused so much trouble. My family was crushed when I was admitted into the hospital for suicide attempt. Now I don't tell anyone about suicial thoughts. Being ill is horrible, but I think it's the pain of knowing that these thoughts don't just go away. I have to deal with this everday. How do others deal with this unhappiness?