I Know You're All Sick Of Me, But...
- Thread starter ~Nobody~
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Terry said:
Hang in there, it can and does get better :hug:
ps:can so relate to the Dell thing...my laptop..over £1,500 and its a pile of fecking shit
ps:can so relate to the Dell thing...my laptop..over £1,500 and its a pile of fecking shit
Short of that miracle, Wednesday is my day.
:blub:
As for Dell...
I hate it! I hate them! I've been arguing with the technition, then the 'manager', then the technition again on the phone for the last hour. I'm being phoned back in 20 minutes and in the meantime I have to write down every fecking error code that pops up just to PROVE I'm not making this up .And why can none of them speak or understand clear English?! I makes me angry when I think about how much more the phonecall is costing me with all the repetitions.
I'm lucky I have alternative computer access at least while I'm at my boyfriend's. I can't work my head out in either direction by Wednesday evening if I don't have the forums.
awb4130578 said:
at least u have a parent that says they love oyu.... my dad and stepmom never say it to me....
...
...
In actuality my mum says bad things about me far far more than she ever says good things. But I know she loved me once. Which is why I made the distinction in my first post. I know there are people like you around. And that makes me very sad :sad:.
Please know that they are not the be all and end all. Take care. x
My boyfriend's mum!! One of the couple of people who I thought actually gave a flying FUCK about me!! Eurghh!!!
She and the rest of my boyfriend's family are going away for two weeks this summer. I couldn't afford to go so me and my boyfriend were going to stay here (at his house). She just arranged (without mentioning to me or my boyfriend) to have the bathroom knocked out and re-done while they're away. That means we would be WITHOUT a bathroom and WITHOUT our bedroom (because the bathroom is next to it and they're moving the wall or something).
When my boyfriend complained she told him he should just go with them if it bothered him and leave me here on my own.
Well that's just great.
I thought I could fucking trust her!
Fuck! :cry: :cry:
I know it's not exactly as if I was on the side of the edge that meant she could tip me over it anyway but this has really upset me!!
really!
just as well i won't fucking be here at all isn't it, seeing as she doesn't give a shit at all either
:cry: :blub:
One of the couple of people who I thought actually gave a flying FUCK about me!! Eurghh!!!She and the rest of my boyfriend's family are going away for two weeks this summer. I couldn't afford to go so me and my boyfriend were going to stay here (at his house). She just arranged (without mentioning to me or my boyfriend) to have the bathroom knocked out and re-done while they're away. That means we would be WITHOUT a bathroom and WITHOUT our bedroom (because the bathroom is next to it and they're moving the wall or something).
When my boyfriend complained she told him he should just go with them if it bothered him and leave me here on my own.
Well that's just great.
I thought I could fucking trust her!
Fuck! :cry: :cry:
I know it's not exactly as if I was on the side of the edge that meant she could tip me over it anyway but this has really upset me!!
really!
just as well i won't fucking be here at all isn't it, seeing as she doesn't give a shit at all either
:cry: :blub:
Hey, SOMEbody
"why can't I shut my head off?"--This is another thing that strikes me.
It's what I picture being the pain of my dead brother before he shot himself.
Stay away from the razor blades long enough to let me be a new friend.
I never play online, I'm fresh and not sick of anybody.
I wonder what hurts you the most.
~Matty
"why can't I shut my head off?"--This is another thing that strikes me.
It's what I picture being the pain of my dead brother before he shot himself.
Stay away from the razor blades long enough to let me be a new friend.
I never play online, I'm fresh and not sick of anybody.
I wonder what hurts you the most.
~Matty
I NEED THAT MIRACLE!!
If I am to be alive in 24 hours.
Fucking hell is a miracle so much to ask for?
:cry:
I am PATHETIC
WHY am I even allowing myself until tomorrow evening?! It's too fucking long for me but still nothing good will happen will it.
THIS THREAD IS THE ULTIMATE TESTIMONY TO HOW USELESS AND PATHETIC I AM!
If I am to be alive in 24 hours.
Fucking hell is a miracle so much to ask for?
:cry:
I am PATHETIC
WHY am I even allowing myself until tomorrow evening?! It's too fucking long for me but still nothing good will happen will it.
THIS THREAD IS THE ULTIMATE TESTIMONY TO HOW USELESS AND PATHETIC I AM!
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I feel really upset that I got to know so few of you.
I feel really upset that my boyfriend went today. I asked him, last night, not to. It isn't an urgent trip or anything. I wanted to give him a chance to be the one to get me out of this place. But he said no. And he's gone. And I am alone.
I'll have to go back to my house within the next two hours, so that I'll have time. And then I won't have any more internet access.
I feel really upset that my boyfriend went today. I asked him, last night, not to. It isn't an urgent trip or anything. I wanted to give him a chance to be the one to get me out of this place. But he said no. And he's gone. And I am alone.
I'll have to go back to my house within the next two hours, so that I'll have time. And then I won't have any more internet access.
You are not alone honey, physically, yes, but you have people online, there are crisis lines, you could go to the hospital for help.
You have a choice in this, and it seems like you are not entirely sure about suicide, so please fight through this as hard as you can.
I'm sorry if me replying stresses you or upsets you or anything. I just wanted you to know that I read and care.
Hang in there honey
You have a choice in this, and it seems like you are not entirely sure about suicide, so please fight through this as hard as you can.
I'm sorry if me replying stresses you or upsets you or anything. I just wanted you to know that I read and care.
Hang in there honey
Of course it doesn't. If people want to reply they should. I didn't mean to upset you before, you didn't wind me up, I was just wound up. I was only trying to apologise and you took it the wrong way :sad:.
What happens when you PHONE the samaritans or something? Do they ask questions? I'm really bad at talking on the phone it's too immediate.
:hug: I know you're feeling bad too sweetheart, and I wish you weren't. x
What happens when you PHONE the samaritans or something? Do they ask questions? I'm really bad at talking on the phone it's too immediate.
:hug: I know you're feeling bad too sweetheart, and I wish you weren't. x
You didn't upset me 
I was just worried about stressing you further, seems like a simple case of wires being crossed
When you phone the samaritans, generally they will say hi, and wait for you respond (I have sometimes sat quiet because I can't find the courage to talk, and they say that's ok because it can take a while to feel safe), and then they might say is there anything you want to talk about, they might ask for a name (to which you can either give a real, or a fake name, or not give a name).
They leave it very much up to you because they are there to listen, and that's what they do. You can hang up at any time. They can't trace you, but if you want them to call an ambulance, then they will, but that is only with your permission and you saying your details.
Why not phone and listen, and then hang up if its too scary to talk, and then keep trying, you will find the courage eventually. They have saved me many times, maybe it's worth a go?
I was just worried about stressing you further, seems like a simple case of wires being crossed When you phone the samaritans, generally they will say hi, and wait for you respond (I have sometimes sat quiet because I can't find the courage to talk, and they say that's ok because it can take a while to feel safe), and then they might say is there anything you want to talk about, they might ask for a name (to which you can either give a real, or a fake name, or not give a name).
They leave it very much up to you because they are there to listen, and that's what they do. You can hang up at any time. They can't trace you, but if you want them to call an ambulance, then they will, but that is only with your permission and you saying your details.
Why not phone and listen, and then hang up if its too scary to talk, and then keep trying, you will find the courage eventually. They have saved me many times, maybe it's worth a go?
No, they get it a lot.
They are taught in their training to listen for 20mins or something for any sound. They understand that people can be scared, and reaching out for help is scary, yet they are there. They won't be mad or think anything less of you. (and this is all what a samaritan told me).
Plus they won't know. They don't trace or even see the phone numbers so there is no way for them to know who you are or anything, so that when/if you do pluck up the courage to talk, they will have no idea that it was you that did that anyway.
They are taught in their training to listen for 20mins or something for any sound. They understand that people can be scared, and reaching out for help is scary, yet they are there. They won't be mad or think anything less of you. (and this is all what a samaritan told me).
Plus they won't know. They don't trace or even see the phone numbers so there is no way for them to know who you are or anything, so that when/if you do pluck up the courage to talk, they will have no idea that it was you that did that anyway.
Often just listening can help, if you talk out how you are feeling.
They are someone totally anonymous that you can tell anything to because they are totally uninvolved and know nothing about you.
They might make suggestions, but they wont tell you to do it, or pressure you, just possibly put your options to it.
If you are wqorried you could always text them first or e-mail to build up confidence, but both of those take a while to get replies to, phoning is instant.
They are someone totally anonymous that you can tell anything to because they are totally uninvolved and know nothing about you.
They might make suggestions, but they wont tell you to do it, or pressure you, just possibly put your options to it.
If you are wqorried you could always text them first or e-mail to build up confidence, but both of those take a while to get replies to, phoning is instant.
Arg!!
FUCK T-MOBILE!!
I have a 'Flext' contract with T-mobile where I pay a certain amount a month (by direct debit) and I get an 'allowance' (much more than what you pay) (in my case £255). I use up that allowance however I like. Texts, picture messages, phonecalls. Texts are 10p each, picture messages are 25p each, local/national/anymobilenetwork phonecalls are 20p a minute.
BUT if I call the Samaritans I pay 10p per minute ON TOP of my allowance. It doesn't come out of it. EVEN THOUGH if I called from a landline (which I can't) it would only be the cost of a local call.
I can't afford any more than I am already paying. It's hard enough as it is. AND I spent basically all my money on sodding pills so that I'd be able to do this successfully. how fucking ironic.
Fuck it!!
I am just SUPPOSED to die tonight.
FUCK T-MOBILE!!
I have a 'Flext' contract with T-mobile where I pay a certain amount a month (by direct debit) and I get an 'allowance' (much more than what you pay) (in my case £255). I use up that allowance however I like. Texts, picture messages, phonecalls. Texts are 10p each, picture messages are 25p each, local/national/anymobilenetwork phonecalls are 20p a minute.
BUT if I call the Samaritans I pay 10p per minute ON TOP of my allowance. It doesn't come out of it. EVEN THOUGH if I called from a landline (which I can't) it would only be the cost of a local call.
I can't afford any more than I am already paying. It's hard enough as it is. AND I spent basically all my money on sodding pills so that I'd be able to do this successfully. how fucking ironic.
Fuck it!!
I am just SUPPOSED to die tonight.
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