Hello,
Some people here know my story that caused me to start coming to this forum. I'll explain a little about the problem I'm having right now for anyone who doesn't.
A few years ago I was in a graduate program that was sort of a prep program for med school, but graduating didn't guarantee you an acceptance. In this program I was bullied. It was awful. It was competitive and everyone in my class hated me for doing well. They did everything they could to tear me down and ruin me, ruin my grades. I had no friends, I suffered alone. I came into this program already traumatized. I was raised in a violent, abusive home and I was bullied in high school and college too. So I lost all hope when, in this program, the staff members participated in the bullying and even helped the bullies to ruin me. That's when I made a suicide attempt. The things that happened in my life and continued to happen was too much to take alone.
They didn't ruin my grades, but they destroyed every other part of me. I couldn't get into other med schools and I was too scared to go back to the one where I was bullied.
I spent the last couple of years working jobs that I hate and couldn't let go of wanting to be a doctor. I ended up applying this year to this school. They have multiple campuses and I applied to all of them. I had an interview at one, but was put on the waitlist. I don't know if or when I might be accepted off the waitlist. I might even get a rejection and it's killing me.
My problem right now is that I have an interview with the campus where I was bullied. If it was just an interview it would be ok. But before the interview there's an hour long Q and A session with student ambassadors. This means that one or more of the girls that bullied me might be there. It's likely and I'm expecting the worst.
I'm devastated and so depressed that I'm paralyzed with fear. They will sit there gloating and feeling so good about themselves that they made it into the program and I'm still struggling. I don't know how to handle this. I need to do this interview because I need to get into a program that I've worked so hard for. But it kills me that they won. It makes them feel good. They have everything and they took everything from me.
Some people here know my story that caused me to start coming to this forum. I'll explain a little about the problem I'm having right now for anyone who doesn't.
A few years ago I was in a graduate program that was sort of a prep program for med school, but graduating didn't guarantee you an acceptance. In this program I was bullied. It was awful. It was competitive and everyone in my class hated me for doing well. They did everything they could to tear me down and ruin me, ruin my grades. I had no friends, I suffered alone. I came into this program already traumatized. I was raised in a violent, abusive home and I was bullied in high school and college too. So I lost all hope when, in this program, the staff members participated in the bullying and even helped the bullies to ruin me. That's when I made a suicide attempt. The things that happened in my life and continued to happen was too much to take alone.
They didn't ruin my grades, but they destroyed every other part of me. I couldn't get into other med schools and I was too scared to go back to the one where I was bullied.
I spent the last couple of years working jobs that I hate and couldn't let go of wanting to be a doctor. I ended up applying this year to this school. They have multiple campuses and I applied to all of them. I had an interview at one, but was put on the waitlist. I don't know if or when I might be accepted off the waitlist. I might even get a rejection and it's killing me.
My problem right now is that I have an interview with the campus where I was bullied. If it was just an interview it would be ok. But before the interview there's an hour long Q and A session with student ambassadors. This means that one or more of the girls that bullied me might be there. It's likely and I'm expecting the worst.
I'm devastated and so depressed that I'm paralyzed with fear. They will sit there gloating and feeling so good about themselves that they made it into the program and I'm still struggling. I don't know how to handle this. I need to do this interview because I need to get into a program that I've worked so hard for. But it kills me that they won. It makes them feel good. They have everything and they took everything from me.