My first time posting here and let me just say, I WISH I WAS DEAD!!
My life is so bad none of you can imagine it. In fact, xxx could not help me in any way!!!!! Let me explain to you my extremely sad life in 23 bullets:
1.) I have had a pilonidal cyst problem for three years straight and it is still a problem. I've had four separate surgeries on there and it still didn't close!! I kept treating it and everything but it just kept opening up!
2.) My grades are slowly becoming F's. I study every single night and complete all my homework just to realize that I get a C or a D on a test, maybe even lower. While all the stupider kids (didn't mean to offend anyone) are getting higher grades than me
3.) I have no true friends. All the friends I have either treat me badly, talk cr@p behind my back, or sometimes they would hang out with me one day, write down all of my responses to things, and they would use that against me (I've caught them doing that before)
4.) I don't have many talents. I can't swim, I can't make music, I won't take apart a broken computer to discover the pieces inside, I won't do any of those stuff because I'm the most idiotic loser in the entire world and maybe even other worlds
5.) People use ANYTHING to put me down in depression. If I post a status on Facebook saying my life sucks or "FML" then one of my "friends" types of "stop crying" and over 50 people click "like" on that comment
6.) STUDENTS ONLY USE ME FOR MY EXPERTISE IN MATHEMATICS. I have been known to excel in math, so my "friends" ask for help and when I help them they don't even say thank you, and they don't respond to me after that, except when they need more help with something related to math
7.) I've been called too many names. Fatty, Fat nerd, ugly piece of SH*t, desperate fat@$$, turd, more than u can imagine. No matter what they all say, any name immediately upsets me
8.) I'm really really fat. Actually, I'm obese and currently on a diet, and some of the kids say "haha u can't lose weight u fat turd, go to mommy and suck milk from her brea$t$ saying 'mommie mommie! Milkie milkie!'' THAT has upset me the most.
9.) I have an emotionally abusive father. Whenever I do something wrong or something accidentally or even something the way he doesn't want things to go, he starts to yell at me, sometimes yank on my ears, and rarely throw a few things of mine across the room so that they would break. I'm forced to go with him outside and if I say "No", then he will say "You are the most useless child a father can ever have" or something related to that
10.) A few months ago, one bully has been cheating work in my computer class off of my computer. I didn't realize this and his paper was exactly like mine except he had his name on it. Now I have a permanent cheating record (THEY THINK I CHEATED), and I cant do anything about it. The kid moved to a different high school since he had too many bad records in my school, and my teacher that accused me of cheating probably threw away the work we did on our computers. He had his own document in his own computer! I tried telling my teacher about how I didn't cheat but instead he said "I don't have time for this and if you talk back to me, I'm going to reward you with a suspension and possibly an expulsion." So now I have a cheating record that i didn't do.
11.) I've never had a girlfriend or even kissed or hugged a girl, no girl wants to ever talk to me, and if some of them get close they say "EWW?" and walk fast away from me, so there is no chance I'll ever have a gf or be with anyone
12.) I realized a few days ago that me not reading books daily is very very bad for my mental thinking. I have a good enough vocabulary and can keep a conversation going, but I don't read books, unless I have to. I need someone to tell me something that will motivate me to read books.
13.) My hope for becoming a lawyer is slowly fading. Since I keep thinking to myself "I'm just getting stupider by the schoolyear, why not just get a simple job and suffer?" and that leads to another reason why I should kill myself.
14.) Whenever I get really angry or pissed at something, I immediately take my right or left hand, and bite it with all my force. Half of the times, blood gushes out but not too much, and that immediately makes me calm. Someone please tell me how to stop doing this
15.) Since I'm bullied so much in school, one little insult can immediately hurt my feelings and then sometimes I just go somewhere quiet and cry my eyes out during lunch time, or if I get insulted through facebook I post a status about how my life sucks, I bite my arm really hard again, and then go cry as I wipe the blood from my arm
16.) Since my dad is so overly emotionally abusive, when someone tries to pat my back or when someone give me a handshake, or even when they want to do a knuckle touch, i immediately back away, shaking from fear, and the nerves in my arm suddenly hold still for 2 seconds. That's partly why I don't have "true friends"
17.) I get very very sick so easily! As soon as cold air is blown on me from a windy day or something, I immediately start to sneeze a few times, and then my throat starts to itch and I get a very heavy desire to just spit it all out. I don't know what's wrong with me, has God punished me? Is it an allergy to cold air? I doubt it
18.) Most of the insults that the kids in my school say are true, and they took a wild guess saying that insult. They say I have a tiny * * * * , and it's true. They say I'm extremely ugly, and it's true to 90% of my friends, etc etc etc there are alot of insults they say that are true
19.) While on my diet, for breakfast I just eat a plate of different healthy nuts, including raw peanuts, raw almonds, raw cashews, prunes, and sunflower seeds. The thing is I don't lose weight, I'm actually gaining 0.5 pounds each day. I don't eat dinners, and for lunch I have a small portion of chicken with rice, and a bowl of salad with olive oil on it. All those things prevent constipation and aren't fattening. They may have fat but it's the good type of fat that fights off bad fat. Even after all that, I gain pounds!!
20.) My sister and my dad always harass my mom emotionally and there's nothing I can do about it. When I go up to my dad and sister, I yell at them, instead they just laugh and push me really hard so that I fall face-first to the ground. My mom is the only one I trust and I'm the only one she trusts
21.) I'm also not the type of person to take revenge, which means whenever someone insults me with something, or physically hurts me, they get away with it. No I will not change who I am because it won't matter anymore
22.) Whenever I talk to a school psychiatrist, they just explain to me my problems, they don't bother telling me how to solve them, and then tell me "I hope everything works out for you". Yeah, no that will not happen
23.) Whenever a kid bullies me, and I retaliate, and we both get in trouble, the assistant principal always takes his side and I get punished, when he was the first person to insult me. I was just using self-defense...
You think after all of this you can say I shouldn't kill myself?
EDIT: Today...I failed two tests that I took even though I've STUDIED for them...I got teased at for my grades on the tests and people called me a dumbass'...I am a sophomore, with a worse grade than a freshman in my same algebra 2 class...
My life is so bad none of you can imagine it. In fact, xxx could not help me in any way!!!!! Let me explain to you my extremely sad life in 23 bullets:
1.) I have had a pilonidal cyst problem for three years straight and it is still a problem. I've had four separate surgeries on there and it still didn't close!! I kept treating it and everything but it just kept opening up!
2.) My grades are slowly becoming F's. I study every single night and complete all my homework just to realize that I get a C or a D on a test, maybe even lower. While all the stupider kids (didn't mean to offend anyone) are getting higher grades than me
3.) I have no true friends. All the friends I have either treat me badly, talk cr@p behind my back, or sometimes they would hang out with me one day, write down all of my responses to things, and they would use that against me (I've caught them doing that before)
4.) I don't have many talents. I can't swim, I can't make music, I won't take apart a broken computer to discover the pieces inside, I won't do any of those stuff because I'm the most idiotic loser in the entire world and maybe even other worlds
5.) People use ANYTHING to put me down in depression. If I post a status on Facebook saying my life sucks or "FML" then one of my "friends" types of "stop crying" and over 50 people click "like" on that comment
6.) STUDENTS ONLY USE ME FOR MY EXPERTISE IN MATHEMATICS. I have been known to excel in math, so my "friends" ask for help and when I help them they don't even say thank you, and they don't respond to me after that, except when they need more help with something related to math
7.) I've been called too many names. Fatty, Fat nerd, ugly piece of SH*t, desperate fat@$$, turd, more than u can imagine. No matter what they all say, any name immediately upsets me
8.) I'm really really fat. Actually, I'm obese and currently on a diet, and some of the kids say "haha u can't lose weight u fat turd, go to mommy and suck milk from her brea$t$ saying 'mommie mommie! Milkie milkie!'' THAT has upset me the most.
9.) I have an emotionally abusive father. Whenever I do something wrong or something accidentally or even something the way he doesn't want things to go, he starts to yell at me, sometimes yank on my ears, and rarely throw a few things of mine across the room so that they would break. I'm forced to go with him outside and if I say "No", then he will say "You are the most useless child a father can ever have" or something related to that
10.) A few months ago, one bully has been cheating work in my computer class off of my computer. I didn't realize this and his paper was exactly like mine except he had his name on it. Now I have a permanent cheating record (THEY THINK I CHEATED), and I cant do anything about it. The kid moved to a different high school since he had too many bad records in my school, and my teacher that accused me of cheating probably threw away the work we did on our computers. He had his own document in his own computer! I tried telling my teacher about how I didn't cheat but instead he said "I don't have time for this and if you talk back to me, I'm going to reward you with a suspension and possibly an expulsion." So now I have a cheating record that i didn't do.
11.) I've never had a girlfriend or even kissed or hugged a girl, no girl wants to ever talk to me, and if some of them get close they say "EWW?" and walk fast away from me, so there is no chance I'll ever have a gf or be with anyone
12.) I realized a few days ago that me not reading books daily is very very bad for my mental thinking. I have a good enough vocabulary and can keep a conversation going, but I don't read books, unless I have to. I need someone to tell me something that will motivate me to read books.
13.) My hope for becoming a lawyer is slowly fading. Since I keep thinking to myself "I'm just getting stupider by the schoolyear, why not just get a simple job and suffer?" and that leads to another reason why I should kill myself.
14.) Whenever I get really angry or pissed at something, I immediately take my right or left hand, and bite it with all my force. Half of the times, blood gushes out but not too much, and that immediately makes me calm. Someone please tell me how to stop doing this
15.) Since I'm bullied so much in school, one little insult can immediately hurt my feelings and then sometimes I just go somewhere quiet and cry my eyes out during lunch time, or if I get insulted through facebook I post a status about how my life sucks, I bite my arm really hard again, and then go cry as I wipe the blood from my arm
16.) Since my dad is so overly emotionally abusive, when someone tries to pat my back or when someone give me a handshake, or even when they want to do a knuckle touch, i immediately back away, shaking from fear, and the nerves in my arm suddenly hold still for 2 seconds. That's partly why I don't have "true friends"
17.) I get very very sick so easily! As soon as cold air is blown on me from a windy day or something, I immediately start to sneeze a few times, and then my throat starts to itch and I get a very heavy desire to just spit it all out. I don't know what's wrong with me, has God punished me? Is it an allergy to cold air? I doubt it
18.) Most of the insults that the kids in my school say are true, and they took a wild guess saying that insult. They say I have a tiny * * * * , and it's true. They say I'm extremely ugly, and it's true to 90% of my friends, etc etc etc there are alot of insults they say that are true
19.) While on my diet, for breakfast I just eat a plate of different healthy nuts, including raw peanuts, raw almonds, raw cashews, prunes, and sunflower seeds. The thing is I don't lose weight, I'm actually gaining 0.5 pounds each day. I don't eat dinners, and for lunch I have a small portion of chicken with rice, and a bowl of salad with olive oil on it. All those things prevent constipation and aren't fattening. They may have fat but it's the good type of fat that fights off bad fat. Even after all that, I gain pounds!!
20.) My sister and my dad always harass my mom emotionally and there's nothing I can do about it. When I go up to my dad and sister, I yell at them, instead they just laugh and push me really hard so that I fall face-first to the ground. My mom is the only one I trust and I'm the only one she trusts
21.) I'm also not the type of person to take revenge, which means whenever someone insults me with something, or physically hurts me, they get away with it. No I will not change who I am because it won't matter anymore
22.) Whenever I talk to a school psychiatrist, they just explain to me my problems, they don't bother telling me how to solve them, and then tell me "I hope everything works out for you". Yeah, no that will not happen
23.) Whenever a kid bullies me, and I retaliate, and we both get in trouble, the assistant principal always takes his side and I get punished, when he was the first person to insult me. I was just using self-defense...
You think after all of this you can say I shouldn't kill myself?
EDIT: Today...I failed two tests that I took even though I've STUDIED for them...I got teased at for my grades on the tests and people called me a dumbass'...I am a sophomore, with a worse grade than a freshman in my same algebra 2 class...
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) 
plus I'm very shy when talking on the phone or talking face to face. Like I've mentioned, I would say "it doesn't matter anyway, why be shy? there's no one to be shy for. my life sucks and can't get any better, so why try?" and then I will probably just drop the phone and completely ignore it 
ty