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Jim’s Monday Cafe 31 August 2020
- Thread starter Inya
- Start date
- Status
Hey guys, I hope you don’t mind me opening The Cafe today. 
It’s night here, or almost morning for some, and I’m trying to sleep without much success obviously.
Google photos says it’s four years since I met my significant other. So I’m thinking…about love…the romantic one.
What do you think about it? Does love conquer all? Can true love overcome all obstacles? In real life of just in cheesy romantic stories?
But first let me prepare you some breakfast. We have unlimited amount of delicious jamón, potato tortilla, churros with hot chocolate, coffee and fresh orange juice.
View attachment 37125
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Now let’s talk about obstacles and differences. Those things that don’t matter at all in friendship or casual relationship, but they might if you "accidentally" fall in love.
What were/are/would you be willing to sacrifice, compromise or give up for the love of your life?
Here are some questions for you.
You meet this person that makes you feel like no one ever has before.
1. All odds are against you. Do you try to find a solution, no matter how impossible it seems, or you give up
If meant to be it will work out.
2. Does it bother you if this special person is of different race/ethnicity and culture?
If meant to be then those obstacles will not be obstacles.
3. What about different religion, ideology and political beliefs?
Encountered this and found that like research shows, the more similar you are then the better the outcome.
4. Different socioeconomic class?
Ahh. Number one reason for divorce is money. Need I say more.
5. Big age difference?
Hmm. Everyone is attracted to youth. Men and women. The motivation for a younger person to be with a parental figure is usually for some type of security. The relationship lasts as long as the needs last and are satisfied.
6. Would you move to a foreign country for them?
7. Your entire family and friends are against the relationship. You can’t change their mind, you have to choose between them and the person you love. What would you do? Who do you choose?
Everyone is invited, stop by even if you don’t feel like answering, just to say hi. Or you can tell us what a bullshit romantic love is. Whatever comes to your mind.
I’ll answer my questions later after I hopefully sleep a few hours. I’ll be back for a happy hour.
Help me tag please
It’s night here, or almost morning for some, and I’m trying to sleep without much success obviously.Google photos says it’s four years since I met my significant other. So I’m thinking…about love…the romantic one.
What do you think about it? Does love conquer all? Can true love overcome all obstacles? In real life of just in cheesy romantic stories?
But first let me prepare you some breakfast. We have unlimited amount of delicious jamón, potato tortilla, churros with hot chocolate, coffee and fresh orange juice.
View attachment 37125
View attachment 37126
View attachment 37127
Now let’s talk about obstacles and differences. Those things that don’t matter at all in friendship or casual relationship, but they might if you "accidentally" fall in love.
What were/are/would you be willing to sacrifice, compromise or give up for the love of your life?
Here are some questions for you.
You meet this person that makes you feel like no one ever has before.
1. All odds are against you. Do you try to find a solution, no matter how impossible it seems, or you give up
If meant to be it will work out.
2. Does it bother you if this special person is of different race/ethnicity and culture?
If meant to be then those obstacles will not be obstacles.
3. What about different religion, ideology and political beliefs?
Encountered this and found that like research shows, the more similar you are then the better the outcome.
4. Different socioeconomic class?
Ahh. Number one reason for divorce is money. Need I say more.
5. Big age difference?
Hmm. Everyone is attracted to youth. Men and women. The motivation for a younger person to be with a parental figure is usually for some type of security. The relationship lasts as long as the needs last and are satisfied.
6. Would you move to a foreign country for them?
7. Your entire family and friends are against the relationship. You can’t change their mind, you have to choose between them and the person you love. What would you do? Who do you choose?
Everyone is invited, stop by even if you don’t feel like answering, just to say hi. Or you can tell us what a bullshit romantic love is. Whatever comes to your mind.
I’ll answer my questions later after I hopefully sleep a few hours. I’ll be back for a happy hour.
Help me tag please
Thank you for opening the cafe and tagging me @Inya
1) I find a solution. There is always one somewhere.
2) Race and ethnicity don't bother me. I find it interesting to learn different cultures. My culture was very different from the woman I was married to.
3) Different religion it would depend on the religion. Ideology and political beliefs don't matter; we could have interesting adult conversations about our different beliefs.
4) Different socioeconomic class would not matter. I work hard, I earn my money, I hope simply that she respects that.
5) Age does not matter.
6) I had to choose one time because a woman loved me and wanted me to move from the US to Brazil. I broke things off with her.
7) My parents were against my marriage. It was eleven years before my dad spoke to my wife. Screw them.
1) I find a solution. There is always one somewhere.
2) Race and ethnicity don't bother me. I find it interesting to learn different cultures. My culture was very different from the woman I was married to.
3) Different religion it would depend on the religion. Ideology and political beliefs don't matter; we could have interesting adult conversations about our different beliefs.
4) Different socioeconomic class would not matter. I work hard, I earn my money, I hope simply that she respects that.
5) Age does not matter.
6) I had to choose one time because a woman loved me and wanted me to move from the US to Brazil. I broke things off with her.
7) My parents were against my marriage. It was eleven years before my dad spoke to my wife. Screw them.
Mmmmmm that breakfast looks absolutely lush @Inya
I'm the first person to admit that I'm an absolute romance dreamer. Maybe because it's been absent from my life for so long but without it I feel lost. I need to feel that I'm wanted and have that connection with someone. Does love conquer all? Sadly not but it's a good starting point.
Absolutely. If you don't even try to find a solution then it was never really love in the first place.
No. Why would it?
Religion, no. I have no religion myself but it would be fine by me if my partner did.
Ideology and political beliefs, absolutely yes. We tend to think of political beliefs as a separate entity but they are intrinsically entwined with our ideological views. My ideology is at the very centre of who I am and I don't think I could ever truly love someone who had totally opposing humanitarian beliefs to me.
As long as I wasn't looked down on then no (although I would never fall in love with someone who would do this).
I like to think not but it probably could cause a problem if the age gap was too large.
Absolutely yes. It would make it even more of an adventure.
I like to think I'd carefully listen to their concerns and give it a lot of thought. But if having done that I still loved the person but my family and friends couldn't accept that then I'd choose love.
I'm the first person to admit that I'm an absolute romance dreamer. Maybe because it's been absent from my life for so long but without it I feel lost. I need to feel that I'm wanted and have that connection with someone. Does love conquer all? Sadly not but it's a good starting point.
Absolutely. If you don't even try to find a solution then it was never really love in the first place.
No. Why would it?
Religion, no. I have no religion myself but it would be fine by me if my partner did.
Ideology and political beliefs, absolutely yes. We tend to think of political beliefs as a separate entity but they are intrinsically entwined with our ideological views. My ideology is at the very centre of who I am and I don't think I could ever truly love someone who had totally opposing humanitarian beliefs to me.
As long as I wasn't looked down on then no (although I would never fall in love with someone who would do this).
I like to think not but it probably could cause a problem if the age gap was too large.
Absolutely yes. It would make it even more of an adventure.
I like to think I'd carefully listen to their concerns and give it a lot of thought. But if having done that I still loved the person but my family and friends couldn't accept that then I'd choose love.
I think it's best if I don't (answer those q's that is), but I did want to at least say hey to all & also ty for tagging me @Inya & opening the cafe. This is just way too sensitive of a topic for me right now (prob. always will be as far as I can tell) so I think I'll just say...
Yes. I hate it. I hate it all. With an infinite passion.
Yes. I hate it. I hate it all. With an infinite passion.
Sure, why give up if you're in love?
Nah that's not a big thing
Could be an issue for sure. Depends on what each of us believe and how strongly, right?
No, these things change over time if nothing else. But it's not really a big deal *unless* they're really hung up on it. Are they the type that would be flashy with cash? That would really turn me off. Alternately, are they playing victim of circumstance in regards to being skint? Not into that either. Just be who you are - I don't care either way.
How "big" is "big"? But overall, no, not for adults. If you're 15 and 20 that's a much larger difference than 40 and 45. If one of you is in a completely different place than the other like juggling school or a family and the other is partying and drinking that could also result in a big fail. I think if you're in similar places then it'll be okay.
lol Well clearly I would. I never would have answered this with a 'yes' before a couple of years ago to be honest. I would have said emphatically that this was a solid 'no' for me. I guess you just never know...
Nah that's not a big thing
Could be an issue for sure. Depends on what each of us believe and how strongly, right?
No, these things change over time if nothing else. But it's not really a big deal *unless* they're really hung up on it. Are they the type that would be flashy with cash? That would really turn me off. Alternately, are they playing victim of circumstance in regards to being skint? Not into that either. Just be who you are - I don't care either way.
How "big" is "big"? But overall, no, not for adults. If you're 15 and 20 that's a much larger difference than 40 and 45. If one of you is in a completely different place than the other like juggling school or a family and the other is partying and drinking that could also result in a big fail. I think if you're in similar places then it'll be okay.
lol Well clearly I would. I never would have answered this with a 'yes' before a couple of years ago to be honest. I would have said emphatically that this was a solid 'no' for me. I guess you just never know...
Does love conquer all? Can true love overcome all obstacles?
I think it should but in reality that isn’t always the case.
I never liked those romantic happy ending movies, they bored me to death. I enjoyed impossible love stories, you know, when two people fall madly in love but for some reason can’t be together.
I was trying to imagine what I would do in their place, what I would be willing to sacrifice, possible solutions…
Funny thing is that I’ve never been in love before, I mean not really. I had serious relationships and loved every guy dearly, but there was always something missing. I always new it won’t last because I just couldn’t feel what I thought I should have felt, I thought either I wasn’t capable of it or it was all just fairytale crap. But then again, some royals gave up their throne for love.
It was pretty confusing, I beat myself up for a long time. But eventually I stopped giving a f*ck.
And then I fell in love and landed in suicide forum.
I think it should but in reality that isn’t always the case.
I never liked those romantic happy ending movies, they bored me to death. I enjoyed impossible love stories, you know, when two people fall madly in love but for some reason can’t be together.
I was trying to imagine what I would do in their place, what I would be willing to sacrifice, possible solutions…
Funny thing is that I’ve never been in love before, I mean not really. I had serious relationships and loved every guy dearly, but there was always something missing. I always new it won’t last because I just couldn’t feel what I thought I should have felt, I thought either I wasn’t capable of it or it was all just fairytale crap. But then again, some royals gave up their throne for love.
It was pretty confusing, I beat myself up for a long time. But eventually I stopped giving a f*ck.
And then I fell in love and landed in suicide forum.
1. All odds are against you. Do you try to find a solution, no matter how impossible it seems, or you give up?
Yes I will find a solution or deal with it for the rest of my life lol I guess you can get used to some things. You just don't give up
2. Does it bother you if this special person is of different race/ethnicity and culture?
Not at all
3. What about different religion, ideology and political beliefs?
Nope
4. Different socioeconomic class?
Give me some money hahahaha
5. Big age difference?
Not too big like a teen and a grandma
6. Would you move to a foreign country for them?
Definitely
7. Your entire family and friends are against the relationship. You can’t change their mind, you have to choose between them and the person you love. What would you do? Who do you choose?
I mean I'd choose my dog over them sooo I guess that says enough
I have never experienced love in a romantic way yet. I'm not sure if I already felt it or not but never had a girlfriend.
@Inya Thank you for inviting me! You all have a great day!
Yes I will find a solution or deal with it for the rest of my life lol I guess you can get used to some things. You just don't give up
2. Does it bother you if this special person is of different race/ethnicity and culture?
Not at all
3. What about different religion, ideology and political beliefs?
Nope
4. Different socioeconomic class?
Give me some money hahahaha
5. Big age difference?
Not too big like a teen and a grandma
6. Would you move to a foreign country for them?
Definitely
7. Your entire family and friends are against the relationship. You can’t change their mind, you have to choose between them and the person you love. What would you do? Who do you choose?
I mean I'd choose my dog over them sooo I guess that says enough
I have never experienced love in a romantic way yet. I'm not sure if I already felt it or not but never had a girlfriend.
@Inya Thank you for inviting me! You all have a great day!
Hello SF and good morning in the US, good afternoon/evening elsewhere!
I have to go to the post office this morning and see about filing a claim (or something) about a package I mailed July 3, which has apparently gone missing. Man, I hate it when these little things go wrong!
I really like the sound of breakfast!
I hope people have a good a day as possible today.
I have to go to the post office this morning and see about filing a claim (or something) about a package I mailed July 3, which has apparently gone missing. Man, I hate it when these little things go wrong!
I really like the sound of breakfast!
I hope people have a good a day as possible today.
Thanks for opening the cafe @Inya
All the food looks yummy!
I think the important thing to remember is that love is NOTHING like a romantic movie. It takes SO much hard work and effort. The only advantage is that at the end of the day it is worth it
All the food looks yummy!
I think the important thing to remember is that love is NOTHING like a romantic movie. It takes SO much hard work and effort. The only advantage is that at the end of the day it is worth it
@Ineluki
Good morning all and great questions @Inya and love the food....
So to the questions
1. All odds are against you. Do you try to find a solution, no matter how impossible it seems, or you give up?
Absolutely find a solution. I did just that when I moved across the country with job interviews but no job, to be with the man whom has been my husband for over 20 years---though didn't know if it would work out when I did so.
2. Does it bother you if this special person is of different race/ethnicity and culture?
Absolutely not.
3. What about different religion, ideology and political beliefs?
No as love looks past those things.
4. Different socioeconomic class
No, ditto.
5. Big age difference?
No. ditto...as my husband and I are 20 years apart (and his brother and his wife have the same age difference believe it or not)....Age is a state pf mind
6. Would you move to a foreign country for them
Without question...
7. Your entire family and friends are against the relationship. You can’t change their mind, you have to choose between them and the person you love. What would you do? Who do you choose?
My father was against the relationship so by default both my parents... so they never met my husband...which I admit has made me sad as I believe that they both would have liked him immensely.... So I chose my husband,,,,estranged from my parents for over 10 years but kept the door open as an only child thought I should. My mother died about 6 years ago and my father just a few months ago and in talking with his friends discovered he had invented a myriad of lies about my husband as well as myself to justify his actions of not meeting my husband---all so very sad in reality.
tagging @begerac @Shadowlands @@mpk @Sunday16 @Innocent Forever @pooky
So to the questions
1. All odds are against you. Do you try to find a solution, no matter how impossible it seems, or you give up?
Absolutely find a solution. I did just that when I moved across the country with job interviews but no job, to be with the man whom has been my husband for over 20 years---though didn't know if it would work out when I did so.
2. Does it bother you if this special person is of different race/ethnicity and culture?
Absolutely not.
3. What about different religion, ideology and political beliefs?
No as love looks past those things.
4. Different socioeconomic class
No, ditto.
5. Big age difference?
No. ditto...as my husband and I are 20 years apart (and his brother and his wife have the same age difference believe it or not)....Age is a state pf mind
6. Would you move to a foreign country for them
Without question...
7. Your entire family and friends are against the relationship. You can’t change their mind, you have to choose between them and the person you love. What would you do? Who do you choose?
My father was against the relationship so by default both my parents... so they never met my husband...which I admit has made me sad as I believe that they both would have liked him immensely.... So I chose my husband,,,,estranged from my parents for over 10 years but kept the door open as an only child thought I should. My mother died about 6 years ago and my father just a few months ago and in talking with his friends discovered he had invented a myriad of lies about my husband as well as myself to justify his actions of not meeting my husband---all so very sad in reality.
tagging @begerac @Shadowlands @@mpk @Sunday16 @Innocent Forever @pooky
Good morning. Here goes, gonna try to answer.
1. It depends on how much the other person is willing to try and if it affects others, eg. If you have children or not. If there are no children involved then I'd be more prone to say go for it.
2. A little bit because of how I grew up. Weird thing is it doesn't bother me if my children date or marry someone if different race.
3. Religion as long as they dont get on me being atheist. Political as long as they aren't to one extreme and dont want to debate all the time.
Age difference no, family only if you're younger bcz it will impact your future. Another country, I've seen it work.
Thank you for opening the cafe this morning @Inya.
1. It depends on how much the other person is willing to try and if it affects others, eg. If you have children or not. If there are no children involved then I'd be more prone to say go for it.
2. A little bit because of how I grew up. Weird thing is it doesn't bother me if my children date or marry someone if different race.
3. Religion as long as they dont get on me being atheist. Political as long as they aren't to one extreme and dont want to debate all the time.
Age difference no, family only if you're younger bcz it will impact your future. Another country, I've seen it work.
Thank you for opening the cafe this morning @Inya.
Fred Flintstone- Status