Moan a minute Mary

[MoAnamCara]

That's how I feel. If it's not one thing with me it's another. I get tired of aches and pains and this issue and then another issue. It's all stupid stuff. They want me to have minor surgery. Great! If I go and see about my back and neck I know they'll want to go in and do more surgery. I don't want that. I can't deal with getting over that on my own.

I have to get a headstone. I've put it off for a long time but I feel it is time. However the thought of doing that sends me reeling and having to do that alone seems very large still. It has to be done though somehow.

I keep thinking about not being here. Perhaps in a twisted way it helps me get through stuff.

I keep having sleep issues. wtf already? Same thoughts and images go through my mind each night. It makes me very sad.

Been having some flashback issues this week. It's funny t hey appear to come out of nowhere. But I know something is triggering them. Stress certainly doesn't help my body nor mind.

Yes, def a moaner atm.

 

[DrownedFishOnFire]

I think your doing fine. Its more of a venting than a moan in my opinion.

Especially when it comes to ones health if its one thing atfer another its definely required to vent the pent up frustrations.

Got health issues myself and minor ones drives me more nuts than the major ones, do you feel the same way?

 

[flowers]

sorry you are in so much pain atm, Mo. Do you really have to do what they recommend? After all, it is your body. I think if you have back and neck issues, it would be up to you to decide about surgery. Even if they recommend it. My MD recommends a lot of things. I usually say "thanks for sharing". I am assuming the minor surgery you are planning is in a different catagory. One where it would not be as optional. i am sorry you are having flashbacks. They are horrible. And you are not a moaner at all. Just are dealing with a lot. More than most.

 

[MoAnamCara]

Thank you for responding, both of you.

It's like just one thing after another after another. And it's just me letting it pile up. I think many if not most of us here find it difficult when it comes to doing big things on our own. It makes things a little more scary and hard and emphasizes the aloneness. And that solitude isn't always welcome.

 

[flowers]

Yes those big things such as surgeries and recoveries do amplify the aloneness for sure. I could say I am there for you. But I am there many miles away. Of course you need someone who lives close. It really can bring that alone stuff up. And can hit someone right between the eyes ( and heart) with it. I honestly understand, from my perspective, what you are saying. I had a a hospital priest sit with me before surgery. No one else to do it. And we both know i am not catholic. Actually, he also liked Buddhism. And his visit to my hospital room annoyed my mother the next day. she hates God. So it was sort of worth it, speaking from a purely naughty perpective.

Re the surgery,, and pre and post, I will be there for you every day on the phone if you will allow it. I know this does not solve things. But it is what I would like to do.

 

[MoAnamCara]

Thanks flowers