Musings, ideas, what are you thinking about?

[Aurelia]

Blah blah, pretend I’m quoting someone and responding to that.

Something I’ve heard a lot is that Jessica wouldn’t want me to hurt so much. And yes, this is obviously true. Switch our positions, and I would hate the thought of her having to feel the way I do.

But

My feelings toward her mean that “her absence” and “my happiness” are entirely incompatible concepts. That’s just how it is, and there’s no getting around it. And I know that the same was true for her. And the fact that she felt the same means literally everything to me.

So if someone were to ask me “Wouldn’t you want her to move on and be happy?” they’d really be asking me two questions:

Do you want her to hurt?

and

Do you want your own feelings to go unreciprocated?

The answer to both questions is a resounding “NO.” But we don’t get to have things both ways.

Right. That's more or less what I've been trying to say. I don't like the one I love being in pain, for any reason. But do I want my feelings to not be reciprocated instead? Not really.

 

[Witty_Sarcasm]

I can think of a handful of people here who have died or ended it. I didn't really know any of them personally, but it still makes me sad. And I hope that my friends that left are doing alright now. And I hope the friends I do have here will stick around.

 

[Auri]

But do I want my feelings to not be reciprocated instead? Not really.

Oh, that's a pretty strong one, it can explain a few things about what I said. But I won't be long about it, I promise :p I don't necessarily want my feelings reciprocated. Never. If I do love someone, probably they do care about me to a certain extent, too, but I never expect the same feeling from the other person. I love the experience of loving more than being loved.

Which makes me a total alien. I know.

And I understand why others aren't like me, just so it's clear :p

 

[Aurelia]

I can think of a handful of people here who have died or ended it. I didn't really know any of them personally, but it still makes me sad. And I hope that my friends that left are doing alright now. And I hope the friends I do have here will stick around.

Don't worry. I'll stick around. You're stuck with my crazy ass.

 

[Aurelia]

Oh, that's a pretty strong one, it can explain a few things about what I said. But I won't be long about it, I promise :p I don't necessarily want my feelings reciprocated. Never. If I do love someone, probably they do care about me to a certain extent, too, but I never expect the same feeling from the other person. I love the experience of loving more than being loved.

Which makes me a total alien. I know.

And I understand why others aren't like me, just so it's clear :p

Hm. I'm curious to know why you feel this way.

 

[Witty_Sarcasm]

Lol that's good, means none of us can die prematurely. I'll try to live to 155. :P

 

[Aurelia]

Lol that's good, means none of us can die prematurely. I'll try to live to 155. :P

If I lived that long, I'd definitely just off myself at that point. Up until 88 years old, I'll live. But after that, that's way too long.

 

[Aurelia]

Question for you guys though, if you could stay young forever, how long would you want to live then?

 

[Auri]

Hm. I'm curious to know why you feel this way.

I have a few ideas. But I guess a serious psychoanalysis would be required to explain it well :P

 

[Aurelia]

I have a few ideas. But I guess a serious psychoanalysis would be required to explain it well :P

Lol. Well, I think that's very selfless of you, honestly. So if anything, it seems like a good thing.

 

[Witty_Sarcasm]

Maybe 250 years or so. Don't think I would want to live forever.

 

[Aurelia]

Maybe 250 years or so. Don't think I would want to live forever.

Me either. I'm sure I'd get sick of it at some point. I think I'd probably shoot for 200. If I absolutely loved my life, maybe longer. But I don't see that happening.

 

[Auri]

Lol. Well, I think that's very selfless of you, honestly. So if anything, it seems like a good thing.

It has its perks, yes Thanks ^^ This doesn't mean I cannot be disappointed in someone, though. I expect some things, that I consider necessary for a true friend/relationship, but I don't expect the same as what I give, probably much less.

 

[Auri]

Question for you guys though, if you could stay young forever, how long would you want to live then?

Cannot give a number as I don't know how long it would take, but I think I would want to live until I fulfill all my dreams then. Like study everything possible, travel to many places, see all the concerts I want, contribute to the world and to animals in particular, etc. Then when I am satisfied, I could die.
Although living longer means being subject to more happy moments, but why not more painful moments, too (like watching your loved ones die :wow, so that could also make the difference.

 

[Aurelia]

Cannot give a number as I don't know how long it would take, but I think I would want to live until I fulfill all my dreams then. Like study everything possible, travel to many places, see all the concerts I want, contribute to the world and to animals in particular, etc. Then when I am satisfied, I could die.
Although living longer means being subject to more happy moments, but why not more painful moments, too (like watching your loved ones die :wow, so that could also make the difference.

That's a great point. I'd definitely want to take the time to study certain things as well. Get as much knowledge as possible.

 

[Aurelia]

It has its perks, yes Thanks ^^ This doesn't mean I cannot be disappointed in someone, though. I expect some things, that I consider necessary for a true friend/relationship, but I don't expect the same as what I give, probably much less.

Its better that way because you don't get disappointed as much, whereas I often do. But nevertheless, I feel I don't actually get as much as I give in my relationship a lot. Emotionally, at least. And I still stick around though. It sucks, and it is disappointing, but love is about giving more than getting.

 

[1964dodge]

if I had to live forever like I am, hell no ! but if someone could make me a teenager forever without pain or illness of course I would love to live forever. to learn all that is knowable, to do everything I would want to do, and to live in the future with space travel, I would love to travel on a space ship. mike

 

[Shelly]

Singer’s peak of discography

I am happy they have reached success and are now comfortably famous, meaning they no longer have to hustle or work hard to earn recognition/fame... that said i miss singers’ particular “era” where they really were on their peak, i mean hit songs after hit songs, stellar performances, you can really see how passionate they are...

Lady Gaga’s The Fame era until Born This Way era

Katy Perry’s Fireworks era

Taylor Swifts Shake It Off era

Rihanna’s Only Girl (Red hair) Era

 

[Shelly]

Wondering how many people who have been on this forum have actually completed suicide. And meanwhile, we all just post as usual like everything is fine. It's like they just get forgotten. Of course, that wouldn't happen if it was a regular poster. People would notice. But still, how long would it take for them to be forgotten too?

I notice that and when i do, i start asking around what happened to that person, since i’m a pessimistic overthinker i alway think the worst has happened...

I reach out to an admin about it and they always rest assure me that everything’s fine ...


But i still get extremely sad and worry about them even though i dont personally know them...

 

[Shelly]

Sometimes i still feel ming ming my first kitty cat is still with me... like right now i swear there were five cats running around, even though i only have four...

When she recently died her spirit was still too strong i can sense her around back where we used to live...
From time to time i still feel her presence


And now that we have moved homes... today... while i was cleaning the litter box i felt a cat sneak between my feet which i know it was particularly ming ming who liked to do that a lot... none of the four cats i have do that... ming ming was the clingiest kitty cat i ever had...