About two years ago, my boyfriend sexually assaulted me. Most of my friends know about this and even though it's caused me to be depressed, there's a secret that has caused me to be even more depressed. Only two people know and I just told them about a month ago. That secret is that my ex-boyfriend also hit me. It's something almost know one knows because I don't want people to know that I was in an abusive relationship and didn't leave. Especially because people see me as the strong, independent girl who doesn't take crap from anyone and tells my friends to dump a guy if he's a jerk. I don't want people to know that I was in a relationship like that and didn't leave. I made that reputation for myself because I don't like being seen as weak. I'm always the strong one. The one who holds everyone else together when they're breaking down. But it's really starting to take a toll on me and make me get even more depressed because I feel like I can't tell anyone or else the whole world will find out, and that is something I am truly terrified of. I came very close to attempting suicide about three or four months ago and I'm starting to consider it again. I don't want to. I really don't. I hate feeling that way, but I can't help it and it's just getting worse and worse. I don't know what to do anymore. My one friend suggested seeing a therapist but in order for me to be able to do that, I would have to ask my parents because I'm only 16. And they would want to know why. I'm not ready to tell them that he used to hit me and I didn't leave him. I feel like they would be ashamed of me and I really can't take that either. It just feels like there's nothing left to do anymore.