Should I seek help?

[Cleom]

Hi everyone,

I thought I'd ask for some opinions: I am depressed and I think about suicide quite a bit. I've decided how I would attempt it and think about how it would feel. But I don't think I'd actually go through with it. Should I talk to someone or just wait for it to pass? I haven't told anyone and I'm scared to share this. Thanks for your thoughts.

 

[full]

Hi Cleom, im glad u found this place. As someone who has been depressed and thought about suicide for years, I can tell that seeking help did help in my case. There variety of therapists who understand can help us deal with hard times and dark thoughts we have. Also, comimg here to this portal and interacting with other members also helpped. I wish you feel better amd find a suitable way to overcome this.

 

[Petal]

Hi there! Yes, absolutely you should seek help because you might not be able to cope if things get any worse for you and you will have no one to fall back on. Seek the help of a doctor and therapist, I know it is hard to admit that you need help but it must be done in order for you to heal from this very difficult time in your life. We will also be here for you, to support you, share experiences and no one will judge you here.

 

[may71]

Sorry to hear that you've been feeling suicidal

Treatment sounds like it would be a good idea. In particular it sounds like a good idea to be on meds at least until you no longer feel suicidal.

The links in my signature can connect you to some more information about treatment methods, including some self-help and alternative medicine methods of treatment

 

[Cleom]

Thanks everyone. I know this is a stupid question, but is it common to think about suicide when you are depressed, but not actually believe you'd go through with it? Does this count as suicidal thoughts? To me saying I have suicidal thoughts seems so serious and I'm still living my life, going to work and trying to stay healthy and shake this depression, even while thinking about suicide. Doesn't that mean I am ok and will just get through this without medication? I feel like if I told anyone I have suicidal thoughts that they wouldn't take me seriously, because I put up a good front. I am faking it well.

 

[Atreides]

Yes. I would strongly encourage you get help. Even if you don't think you're in immediate danger. The fact that suicide is on your mind means you are deep in depression. And we live in a time when we can get help with that. Definitely see your doctor.

I think it is common for people in deep depression to feel this way and be afraid make an attempt. Don't just assume you'll get through this without meds. I know for me the thoughts might go away for a while. But they would come back and sometimes worse than the last time.

 

[full]

I have no clue how commom it is. Ive met depressed people who never thought of suicide. Maybe it is deeper than depression. I recommend seeking help before it becomes too strong to bear or deal with it on our own. Thats just from my experience. I had a period when I thought of it and thougth, ah im not gonna do it, then it almost got too late after some time.

 

[Lara_C]

Untreated depression tends to get worse, not better, and the fact you are having suicidal thoughts shows you are deeply in its grip and unlikely to just shake it off, imo. Maintaining a front is the usual way of dealing with it, but without treatment there could come a point when you lose the energy and will to do this. Suicidal ideation is a sign there is something going on in your life which is beyond your present resources to cope with, and you need to figure out what this is, and how to change it.

 

[yozhik]

I think people who don't think they'd go through with it sometimes have other obligations, sometimes are afraid, and sometimes are in denial. I was in the latter category. Looking back I can see how I should have set off red flag after red flag but it didn't seem real, like it could actually happen. Obviously I didn't go through with it 100% but I went through at like 85% and caused a colossal mess. There's nothing wrong with getting help just so you can navigate this safely.

If you're worried about doctors, they are trained to understand stuff like this, because many depressed people do put up a front and many depressed people are just chemically depressed/no "Reason". You can even tell them that you're worried about it if it really bothers you. It's a common concern.But if it's people you know, you have the right to say you don't want to talk about it. If you do want to talk about it you have to be prepared for them not knowing what to say/ regurgitating platitudes bc that's all they might be able to offer.

I've got some trauma stuff so I have a *very* good front. People will not all be nice, a couple have accused me of faking/attention seeking bc I'm 'fine'. The people who care will be a little surprised, unnerved, but they'll accept it. You will be the same person you've always been. Normal people will not have a problem with you just because you see a doctor. And those who do were never there for you.

 

[may71]

is it common to think about suicide when you are depressed, but not actually believe you'd go through with it? Does this count as suicidal thoughts?

Yes. It's pretty common for people to think about it without necessarily having a plan in place or the intention to carry it out.

Doesn't that mean I am ok and will just get through this without medication?

Things probably won't get better unless you get some form of treatment or make some other form of positive change.

Medication is probably a good idea at least for the short term, just because you are close to the edge now. If any sudden stress arrives, you might be in real danger of making an attempt.

If you don't want to try meds, I'd recommend acupuncture and traditional Chinese herbal medicine.

There's also some information about some self-help treatment methods in my signature.

I feel like if I told anyone I have suicidal thoughts that they wouldn't take me seriously, because I put up a good front

We take you seriously, and so would a doctor or a therapist

 

[Cleom]

Thank you everyone for your thoughtful responses and for taking my questions to heart. I am really glad I joined this forum. I talked to my doctor and he offered to refer me to a psychotherapist, so I will follow up on that.

I'm the meantime, may71, thanks for the interesting self help options!

 

[Innocent Forever]

Good for you @Cleom good luck!