Use the minutes when you are Able, the brief moments when you are not at rock bottom. Use those times to reach out for help. Every time you incidentally notice yourself almost smiling at a joke, look for the light. You may have long killing days you can't get up, can't work, can't talk. That is where the depression is. Life is in the tiny minutes you find yourself in a cool shower, calling a healer, accepting the meds, noticing the weather, finding a new path. Use these minutes to find help, to answer your own question.