So Lonely

[Forgotten_Man]

I don't know why I feel this way...:cry: I am just so lonely... that is all I can say... this is the first time I have felt this way since developing internet relationships....:cry: I just wanna die... I mean I have these fantastic internet friends of whom I love so very very much..... yet I cannot shake this alone feeling. I have no friends in the real world... well no one I would consider a true friend someone who I can love and talk too openly.

I HATE THIS FEELING... my friends deserve better than this... I love them... but I sit here feeling unloved and unwanted... I convinced myself that I will settle for less and that net relationships would be good enough.. but they are not.:depressed :depressed :depressed :depressed WHY THE FUCK IS IT LIKE THIS?

 

[numb_numb]

hey D-man erm.. hope you feel better, i am busy lately with stuff and sorry if i was a bit mean last time we talked, but i was in not such a great mood because of you know....... but.. yeah, being lonely really sucks and i'm getting tired of it.. maybe my problem is a tiny bit different, but its pretty much the same.. i have some people who are okay friends but i guess no real friends who i could rely on if i needed anything... i don't know, nevermind, i'm not good with peopleeven though i am still really trying to fix things, well... hmm.. things have gotten a bit (alot?) worse since i last talked to you so i've kind of given up on most of it and am going to just concentrate on school for maybe a couple years so i can get a nice gpa by the time i graduate.. kind of a way to put off the problems until later... so.. i guess i didn't really say anything worth while, but hang in there dude, things'll turn out for you eventually. just.. don't give up yet.

 

[Forgotten_Man]

hey D-man erm.. hope you feel better, i am busy lately with stuff and sorry if i was a bit mean last time we talked, but i was in not such a great mood because of you know....... but.. yeah, being lonely really sucks and i'm getting tired of it.. maybe my problem is a tiny bit different, but its pretty much the same.. i have some people who are okay friends but i guess no real friends who i could rely on if i needed anything... i don't know, nevermind, i'm not good with peopleeven though i am still really trying to fix things, well... hmm.. things have gotten a bit (alot?) worse since i last talked to you so i've kind of given up on most of it and am going to just concentrate on school for maybe a couple years so i can get a nice gpa by the time i graduate.. kind of a way to put off the problems until later... so.. i guess i didn't really say anything worth while, but hang in there dude, things'll turn out for you eventually. just.. don't give up yet.

Yes turn out eventually... it will all get better in due time I guess.... maybe maybe not...

Sorry to hear things have gone down hill..... I hope that I did not have any hand in that.... I was a little down, and you had the right to be a hardass last time we talked. Mainly because I was being a baby.

I will focus on my grades as well... maybe that will take the edge off for a while.

 

[dark_thought]

I feel the same way bud. I don't know what to tell you. Is there any chance you could meet some of your internet friends in real life?

 

[TheBLA]

I have no real friends nor internet friends, just my brother really. :unsure:

 

[ace]

rahul I'm your friend and I sincerely mean it:smile: ,you can talk to me about anything and I will never ever judge you and that goes for anyone else here.FM try not to feel guilty I know what it feel's like when self blame becomes overwhelming,you end up feeling a sense of guilt for everything and it hurt's so much.
It's not your fault let me tell you this,also if you have the feeling that people aren't showing not enough care to you obviously your feeling's of sadness and depression are noteable and warranted.We all feel the need to have people who we can open up to in person,I see where you're coming from because you don't have people you feel you can do this beside's the internet.

 

[rachypooh]

I have no friends, real or internet. I am sure my alters have more friends that I do and that just really pisses me off. I dont evenknow if the alters are friends or not. I guess the only friend I have has four legs and a wet nose.

 

[Forgotten_Man]

I feel the same way bud. I don't know what to tell you. Is there any chance you could meet some of your internet friends in real life?

Hmmm maybe if I was less of a wuss...

I have no real friends nor internet friends, just my brother really. :unsure:

Ok fine no family either I have nothing nada zip zero zilch. You have your brother I have... hmmm oh oh my garbage yes yes.

rahul I'm your friend and I sincerely mean it:smile: ,you can talk to me about anything and I will never ever judge you and that goes for anyone else here.FM try not to feel guilty I know what it feel's like when self blame becomes overwhelming,you end up feeling a sense of guilt for everything and it hurt's so much.
It's not your fault let me tell you this,also if you have the feeling that people aren't showing not enough care to you obviously your feeling's of sadness and depression are noteable and warranted.We all feel the need to have people who we can open up to in person,I see where you're coming from because you don't have people you feel you can do this beside's the internet.

You are right no need to feel guilty about what is my fault originally anyway I mean it was my fault that I let people beat me up as a kid. My fault that I tried living with both of my parents. My fault that I am just a hideous human being. Yup all my fault and No control over it what so ever. I mean maybe if I was born less shitty things would be better no? And trust me people think of me as an asshole not a depressed loser..... and I am to far in the canyon to climb back out really. I will never be able to put up the happy facade I need to make people think that I am worth their time.

I have no friends, real or internet. I am sure my alters have more friends that I do and that just really pisses me off. I dont evenknow if the alters are friends or not. I guess the only friend I have has four legs and a wet nose.

Yeah I have my cat... but she will be dead soon so best to start detaching myself from her no?

 

[ace]

rachy I'm your friend and I really mean it:smile:,FM sorry we're so far apart or else I'd definitely meet you dude.FM I know what it's like for you to feel in such a way,I can see how hard it was for you with the upbringing you've had.I know what it's like with guilt I really do and it hurt's like a you know what.
I certainly don't blame you for anything or the way you feel,I know what it must be like and how it feel's to be in such a way.

 

[TheBLA]

My younger brother is really my best friend, he's always been around with all the moving around we've done and all. I dunno what I'd do without him.

 

[Forgotten_Man]

rachy I'm your friend and I really mean it:smile:,FM sorry we're so far apart or else I'd definitely meet you dude.FM I know what it's like for you to feel in such a way, I can see how hard it was for you with the upbringing you've had. I know what it's like with guilt I really do and it hurt's like a you know what.
I certainly don't blame you for anything or the way you feel, I know what it must be like and how it feels to be in such a way.

I am not saying you don't....

And I would just wuss out if I were to ever meet you. I would say that I want to then get scared and run.... because I suck like that... but thanks for the offer. At least I can take a little comfort in knowing that I am not alone in this pain. The only problem is that I am tied down forever as where you are not.

My younger brother is really my best friend, he's always been around with all the moving around we've done and all. I dunno what I'd do without him.

Must be nice... I wonder what it is like to actually love your family? Because I don't know... my family spent so much time ignoring me ha I have nothing left really... no feeling or sentiment. If my entire family died tomarrow well I would not feel a thing.

Treasure that relationship because you at least have it.