Hi Planes. I'm so sorry you are going through all this pain. I lost my daughter several years ago. There is no time frame for grieving and we all do it in different ways. I'm sorry you can't talk to your older brother. I really doubt he has forgotten about your brother. I'm sure it's just too painful for him to talk about. My son has never dealt with his sister's death and doesn't talk about her much, either. But I do know he misses her terribly and grieves for her, too. I wish he would talk about her, but it's just the way he handles it. I sought out a professional to learn how to cope. I think with family sometimes that everyone is hurting so much, it's hard to express it. I'm sorry you lost your mom, too. I thought about ending it all when my daughter died. It wasn't that I don't love my son just as much as I love her. It was just the pain was too much to bear. I realized at some point I needed outside help. It made a difference. I was able to vent and get professional advice on how to handle my grief and pain. I don't know if you have gone this route, but if not, it may be something to consider. I will "never get over it" but I have learned to live without her. It doesn't mean it's easy and that I don't miss her. I still have times (like her anniversary) where I grieve deeply. The difference is, I know I will recover from it again. If you'd ever like to talk, please feel free to send me a message.
