I started thinking, actually. You know how we keep getting told that suicide is selfish -- which I get because yes, the people around would grieve one or another. But they move on. They get better eventually, don't they? And, I feel it's better they go through the grief and get better than be stuck with me.
Anyone with thoughts on this?
I would like to answer your question from a Mother who lost a son to suicide!
No we don't get better, or get over it, or move on....the pain is constant and the only thing that changes is that we get better at hiding it from others!
My whole family has been devastated by the death of my son! The family is in ruins!
His Father and I will never be free from pain again!
His friends still suffer from his loss! 5 years later none of us are better! It has changed us all!
We are different people from who we were before my son left.
We will never be the same!
For me there is the heavy burden of guilt that i didn't do enough to save my son!
The feeling of rejection that my love for him wasn't enough for him to stay here for!
The terrible feeling of knowing how much pain he was in because I have felt that pain so much myself, both before and after he left!
The grief is overwhelming even 5 years later!
I believe having spoken to others further on this journey of loss, that it never goes away...just gets different!
I struggle with wanting to leave this world, and staying, so as not to inflict the same pain on those who know me!
I keep doing all I can to get the help I need, to stay, in the hope that others will not feel this indescribable pain!
Suicide leaves a different grief than any other loss!
I Know because I'm 'living' life after suicide loss!
Take care of yourself and keep reaching out for help! You are worth it!
There are people out there who will be touched by your loss! Even if you don't think so!