she seems very depressed, not like she used to be about several months to a year ago. she always seems on edge and anxious and jumpy. she has isolated herself from everyone, even her closest of friends and other family. she doesn’t talk to her friends any more and all she wants to do is stay home. she can’t ever seem to focus on her work or whatever she may be doing in her office, it takes her hours to do something that should take someone else a matter of minutes. she also cries a lot and loves to be alone. she’s said a few times she wishes she wasn’t here and that’s makes a lot of my family upset. also she has talked about driving off a bridge or other methods which wouldn’t be appropriate to say here...
she’s on her second therapist in the course of a year maybe? i’m not exactly sure. she’s not in my immediate family and i don’t live with her but i see her quite frequently. but she seems to have gotten worse, especially the last two or three months like the therapist doesn’t do much. but i cant read her mind. i am just worried for her.
It has changed over the years. When I was going to college, I would willingly go to a hospital during the summer or during breaks during the school year. The older I get, I am more willing to bite the bullet and just try to stay out of a hospital. I started to dislike mental wards when during the summer I was going to college: I got manic and decided to move to Florida. I drove from Michigan and ended up in Miami Florida, and just walked into a hospital emergency room. They did not have a mental ward, and they were going to ship me out to one on Monday. I got there on a Friday, so I was stuck in a hospital room with a elderly woman suffering from dementia. They allowed me to keep my street outfit on, allowed me to keep my keys and all my money and identifications with me. They did have a IV in me, and they had a nurse with me with a one on one care because I was manic.
When Sunday came around, I was already tired of Florida, and tired of the treatment I was getting for being manic. The nurse that was required to watch over me, went over to take care of the woman with dementia and she was not watching me. I pulled out the connection for the IV. I still had the IV line still in my arm, and I did not risk pulling that out as I did not want to be bleeding. I placed a towel over my arm so nobody would see the IV line. I walked out of the room, walked past the nurses station, got onto the elevator and got onto the first floor. Thinking they might be looking for me, I did not risk walking out the main door with a security guard watching over the place. I noticed two nurses talking to each other, and they were going home. They were so engaged in their talking, they did not notice me behind them. They walked to a security door leading out to the staff parking lot. I was right behind them, and they did not pay attention I was walking out the door behind them. When I was in the staff parking lot, I was able to get on the street and walked around the hospital until I got to the main entrance and gotten into my truck and drove away. I have no idea what happened to the nurse who was required to watch over me as a one on one security check.
I drove back to Michigan, and only stopping to get gas on my travel back. I finally got back to the hospital that has taken care of me when I was manic or depressed. They finally removed the IV line from my arm. They contacted the hospital I escaped from, and they contacted the police who were looking for me as a escaped mental person. In fact, the hospital never sent me a hospital bill, or even billed my insurance company. After that experience in Florida, I am a little gun shy about mental hospitals.