BPD Support Thread
- Thread starter Aurelia
- Start date
I don't fit the criteria. I used to fit if you read about quiet borderline - I used to fit 7/8 of the symptoms and I still relate to a lot of it. But in my opinion, asides for the being suicidal and female - that's the only reason the label would have been applied. No one has ever asked me about it.
Also when you read the current ICD 11's criteria, a lot has to be related to relationships. I struggle with relationships in a way that has nothing to do with bpd. I'm not a professional and in my opinion I don't have bpd. Just. Why???????????????
Edit. I know I don't have bpd. I'm just not a professional. I know I fit a lot of the symptoms of ASD although I think it's trauma related. I'm not a professional. I know I have adhd. I can't diagnose myself. I know etc etc etc.
Also when you read the current ICD 11's criteria, a lot has to be related to relationships. I struggle with relationships in a way that has nothing to do with bpd. I'm not a professional and in my opinion I don't have bpd. Just. Why???????????????
Edit. I know I don't have bpd. I'm just not a professional. I know I fit a lot of the symptoms of ASD although I think it's trauma related. I'm not a professional. I know I have adhd. I can't diagnose myself. I know etc etc etc.
Oooh , When I hear anyone questioning a diagnosis...
drives me wild. @Innocent Forever , Trust @Aurelia .
Personally I think when diagnosing, they might as well reach into an upsidedown top hat filled with little folded in half pieces of paper with the initials of a diagnosis written in pencil on each. Radio blaring, beer in the other hand, sitting in the drivers seat of an orange Lamborghini speeding down the street double the speedlimit and a bunch of PAs as passengers and...
Well that's almost how I got mine. Almost 10 years ago during my month long psych hospital stay, I told them I had a woman living inside me who wanted to come out. So they diagnosed me, with BPD.
And that was more accurate than the 10 others I've received since. They never listen to a patient if conjecture seems to do the job.
drives me wild. @Innocent Forever , Trust @Aurelia .
Personally I think when diagnosing, they might as well reach into an upsidedown top hat filled with little folded in half pieces of paper with the initials of a diagnosis written in pencil on each. Radio blaring, beer in the other hand, sitting in the drivers seat of an orange Lamborghini speeding down the street double the speedlimit and a bunch of PAs as passengers and...
Well that's almost how I got mine. Almost 10 years ago during my month long psych hospital stay, I told them I had a woman living inside me who wanted to come out. So they diagnosed me, with BPD.
And that was more accurate than the 10 others I've received since. They never listen to a patient if conjecture seems to do the job.
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So my GP chased up the diagnosis. It was officially diagnosed in November 2023. 1.5 or 2 months since I last saw a therapist in the CMHT. Almost a year since I saw a psychiatrist whose actual letter said PTSD? ASD? ADHD? EUPD?
The therapist or whatever I saw there never understood me and blamed me for things that weren't my fault. I can give details but don't see the point. Not in a harmful way - yes harmful to me - more that she just so misunderstood me. One example is that she told me 'Inno, I always thought your hand movements were aggressive and now I realise they're not'. This was after telling me a few times I was being aggressive my motioning with my hands when I couldn't find words.
I think I'm also finally realising how much of her way of responding to me wasn't my fault because I had zoom therapy yesterday and the same thing P had gotten so frustrated about, this therapist took in her stride and was calm with (me asking her to tell me where we up to when I'd disconnected).
I don't know if there's a way to get the diagnosis questioned. Even if and though I really don't think it's accurate. And even if and though it makes no sense for a diagnosis to be given by a mental health team after I've been discharged by them.
The therapist or whatever I saw there never understood me and blamed me for things that weren't my fault. I can give details but don't see the point. Not in a harmful way - yes harmful to me - more that she just so misunderstood me. One example is that she told me 'Inno, I always thought your hand movements were aggressive and now I realise they're not'. This was after telling me a few times I was being aggressive my motioning with my hands when I couldn't find words.
I think I'm also finally realising how much of her way of responding to me wasn't my fault because I had zoom therapy yesterday and the same thing P had gotten so frustrated about, this therapist took in her stride and was calm with (me asking her to tell me where we up to when I'd disconnected).
I don't know if there's a way to get the diagnosis questioned. Even if and though I really don't think it's accurate. And even if and though it makes no sense for a diagnosis to be given by a mental health team after I've been discharged by them.
Ok, sorry for all of the troubles & exhaustion, as in "exhaustive-efforts," on your behalf; only to then seemingly be met with... 'resistance,' on or by them - (on their end!). Now, do / did you have any questions on any of those Letters there, that the psychiatrist had thought may be possibilities? Or, I'm guessing / presuming that you are "quoting him?" By putting the 'question-marks,' after each one. . . Not that you can't be multiple things, of course. It just looks like he or she was suggesting these as possibilities in need of further analysis. Or investigation. Your therapist sounds terrible. No two-ways, about it. And I guess they represent all that I dislike, or think is wrong when you get one of them who gives their field or occupation, a bad name. Especially if that is their patient's only reference point for experience purposes, or sake. I think I understand, in some small way, perhaps what is going on by the hand movements & gestures, or gesturing, as a way of expressing that which cannot be communicated or verbalized by you - in that moment (sometimes out of even frustration, maybe?) - by or with words. The non-verbal, attempting then, to substitute for... the verbal (as it were). . . Glad you got a better one yesterday on Zoom. On the end comment there, do you mean you sort of "tuned-out," a little bit during, or just for a little while maybe? And is that in reference to what you were asking them about when it got disconnected? Anyway, I'm no know it all or anything. But if there's any questions you have on anything, maybe some one out there can help give you some good pointers. Kind regards, mrb.
It's almost like a way of translation, or translating, then... perhaps, or maybe, don't you think InnO? And it's okay, if you disagree: or just don't know! : ) Yes, you can/or could - always too, just go & get a 'second opinion.' If you find something not to your liking with the first (diagnosis). @Innocent Forever ~
Regardless of what you want to call it--in terms of, "Diagnosis." The important thing is that you get the main, or major symptoms that are affecting you greatly, and interfering with your life on a regular basis. So many of them will overlap, so that is helpful. And yes, Dx will be very beneficial in helping them to dial things in, in terms of treatment, especially when it comes to anything med-related. But if you're unsure, or just plain totally uncertain & not satisfied in total by, or with the results (given you). Then I'd hone in on what things are bothering me most, and to where it's really cramping my style. For lack of a better... So you can, if you have not already (& you probably have) just try to emphasize: these are the 3, or 4, or maybe even 5 things (it doesn't matter the number, for that is insignificant) that are stopping me from living my life the way I really, truly want to. Can you help me? What can you do? And what can be done. Anyway. . . that's just my amateur armchair, there~* @Innocent Forever :^) Best wishes, ^misbgon_.>*
@MisterBGone
The ? Were what the psychiatrist wrote. I actually can have all of them. I probably do have adhd, asd, and possibly cptsd or some sort of dissociative disorder.
I don't fit the criteria for bpd. And I'm not going to yet do anything about it.
The ? Were what the psychiatrist wrote. I actually can have all of them. I probably do have adhd, asd, and possibly cptsd or some sort of dissociative disorder.
I don't fit the criteria for bpd. And I'm not going to yet do anything about it.
And have you been tested for ASD, ever? @Innocent Forever
I agree, and can appreciate / respect - value (very highly!) your opinion, and your feelings, thoughts & beliefs on this. Subject matter, which happens to be very important of course: that being yourself! 
So, it would just be nice to get some clarification from a professional then, to help reinforce or solidify in your own mind, and be able to have that comfort (of knowing) & simply, peace of mind, I guess. Or that's what I'd gather--if it were me, rather... Just curious if you often, or ever have a hard time registering someone's meanings in person. Such as if (whether or not) they are 'joking?' Not trying to confirm anything, of course - just merely, more; "wondering out loud." (I am) : )
So, it would just be nice to get some clarification from a professional then, to help reinforce or solidify in your own mind, and be able to have that comfort (of knowing) & simply, peace of mind, I guess. Or that's what I'd gather--if it were me, rather... Just curious if you often, or ever have a hard time registering someone's meanings in person. Such as if (whether or not) they are 'joking?' Not trying to confirm anything, of course - just merely, more; "wondering out loud." (I am) : )
There tend to be two variables, or standards, maybe I'm missing the right word? ...but two things I like to think about, when I am with any dr. or health care professional. There's how intelligent they are, and then there's how much they care about me, and in terms specifically about or for, how much they're willing to try & put in the effort to solve the problem that is me. For example, you can have the most brilliant dr. on earth, theoretically. But if he doesn't find you worth his, or your salt, then it isn't going to probably do you very much good. Say if he or she, doesn't or don't / won't listen to you. Answer your questions, etc. Or you can have someone who is pretty smart. But they will go to the end of the Earth to try & help you. Some acceptable blend of both, or formulated calculation that you can live with, and be happy & content by, is what's going to ultimately probably be best (for you) & to provide you with, or yield the most satisfying results. I have found anyway, but that said, I'm pretty abnormal. And so I don't think that many of my experiences, would transfer on over to yours, and therefore - then - be applicable
