Not feeling that great at all. Still trying to wrap my head around why someone would value me highly, then act like I don't exist. But then it happens a lot, so I may just deserve it. Wondering why people say they have no support when I am always there for them. They get upset if I cannot be there 24/7, god forbid I have needs of my own. My mom won't stop drinking, you would think she would sober up now, when she needs to get her shit together, but no, of course not. She just stumbles around and bitches and forgets where she is and drinks invisible bottles of alcohol because she has no fucking idea what she is doing anymore. I worry about where the money will come from, if I will just be a loser for the rest of my life. I worry about everyone else, that is expected of me, but no one worries about me. I am really just done with all of this.