I wasn't sure I had it in me today to run around and do all the chores on my list. I did it, plus took my daughter to get her car and took her to lunch. Lately I've been feeling I'm just not enough if that makes sense, but I keep trying. What else am I going to do? I don't want to give up. Sometimes I feel so old, but I'm not there yet I have quite a few more years of living to do. Thanks for listening friends. 
Now, one thing I was wondering. . . & you do not have to answer; because this is just me, sitting her thinking out loud. So you know, probably perhaps a little careless/or reckless & all of that. So with that in mind, and hopefully not having to brace yourself too uncomfortably for what I'm about to ask or say... Do you think that any of the difficulty, or the challenges that are posed or presented to you now, with your current daughter who is living & staying with you, have anything to do with the other older one? In other words, is there an innate fear, almost from within, and maybe it's so deep inside your conscience that you aren't even aware of it? But that you don't want to offend her, or turn her off from you in any way, lest she become unhappy with you & turn her back on you one day too? Or is that all just pure silliness, and the land of lah lah gah gah or I dunno, what (else!)? ;D Because I could see how quite naturally, from a human instinct & nature point of view, you would feel like this reflexive almost defense-mechanism type of restraint, or hesitation when it comes to discipline, or wanting to not judge her too harshly, so as to not have history repeat itself - is all I'm saying. And I could be perfectly wrong & 1000% incorrect. So I'll just continue on or along my merry way, here. Pay no attention to me. I am on Cloud 9, or is it Nine? I don't even know! Simply, "Off- on another; Voyage - to DREAM LAND. . ." 
Or it could be that she is the baby, too. I've heard it said that sometimes by the time they come rolling along, it's like "Heck? Why bother or trouble with it..." & so then they can end up feeling a little bit more 'free-wheeling,' as a result of this (lack of "over-parenting," shall we say?)? And also, I know that there are a whole host of other factors & dynamics at play with the other one. So too, the fact that this one would not ever in all likelihood follow in that's footsteps... & coupled w/the fact that, she doesn't seem to me to be all that troubled? Just a little bit spoiled? Perhaps. But only you or (even she?) can decide upon that, for sure. I can only say that I have seen you cite countless examples of what a fine human being she has turned out to be thus far, and heck, it is also still WAY EARLY (in the game: 20?!?) / Are you kiding me!?! How can any-one, be so young! but seriously, like w/the dinner conversation semi-recently w/your niece, where she was asking your other son about your ex, or checking him on some of his facts there, with the whole accountability blame (attempted on you) game - thing. So anyway, I've babbled enough, so I should probably just stop. Props to you if you've made it this far! HA. Hopefully, once again, I did not offend. For if I did. Just do this - this one sweet, little favor, I ask of you Lane? "Consider the source!" Me. Ha? Are you kidding me, right? Exactly, there. That's what I thought! : )
