A good night's sleep is something I don't think I'll ever have again. It's 4am, I did drift off for a few hours but when I woke up it was 3.34am. I haven't slept for weeks. Maybe 7 hours out of the last 3 weeks. It's causing me to feel absolute despair. Right now the knowledge my method is there is the only thing to cling to. I will need to use it sooner or later. I am getting old, incompetent, poor, in debt, work is going wrong, house is going wrong. I can't cope with any of it any more. I have nobody except SF to talk to, nobody gives a flying fucking shit about me. Not a flying fucking shit.