I don't know if it's the illness or the heat or just fatigue, but I think I'd rather be dead than carry on with this new work. I just can't understand the instructions or what they want and there's no course correction, you have to absorb like 3000 words of instructions and then get thrown in at the deep end where it's sink or get sacked off. I don't do that badly at my real work, mostly, and it's well paid. I just can't motivate myself to do something that pays less than half what I usually earn per hour - I've been tired enough doing one job, I thought a change might be good but I'm clearly not as smart or adaptable as I thought. Just my luck it comes on the day a heatwave and virus strikes. I think I'll have to just leave it. I tried, at least.




