How Are You Feeling Right Now?

[1964dodge]

Thank you @MisterBGone
I'm prepared for rejection. We hadn't been intimate in over a year. He's younger. I always told myself no, don't look at him that way. He was a roomate a couple yrs ago. He needed affection. I hate to admit this, but i know he has a gf. He's incomplete, yet she will always be a priority.

I don't like cheating. It's not cheating though when he is starved for affection and his gf, hasn't given him that for years. I really cant know what he's thinking, but when I gaze into his eyes, all I feel is the moment. He's good at giving someone a laugh, that's what I love about him. Yet he is missing the one thing he said he doesn't have with her, affection, intamicy, passion.

Maybe I think too much, but I really want that passion we have again. If it doesn't happen, it's ok. I've been rejected so much already. I may only live 10 more yrs. I like any moment I have with him. I said this already but waiting for a man to kiss me for over a yr, .... nuf said.

I might be oversharing but it's me. I miss affection. I crave someone like him who will even admit how funny (wierdly) i am, I can laugh at myself. It's just I wish he didn't have her as his future comittment, yet I'll be happy when he feels complete and married...if his goal is to marry her I'm ok. She knows, I'm almost certain. He said he wants to have a polyamouros love relationship. I don't believe you can truly love 2 people in the same way. I'm ok, just having a bit of wine, I hope you are ok too. Thanks for always giving me something that takes me time to think and ponder on.

 

[TragicReality]

i had a tough start this morning. i didn't fall asleep until between 5am to 6am i think because i'm worried about my wife. i got broken sleep until arund 11am.

my wifes brother in law which she is close to got married again last year ( they were together around 5 years after he lost his first wife ). my wife talked to her a lot and was close to her as well. she died last night which my wife took hard. i had the usual talk with her that it's normal for us to lose family because we were both the baby of the family so younger. since we are in our mid 60s her family ranges from 70 to 80s and some in the 90s. it's just been a lot of deaths the last two years.

my son took my truck today to fix my exhaust and put a flowmaster muffler on it. he also changed the oil and had it stickered. since my grandson was down i asked him to bring my grandson over to help cheer up my wife. instead he picked up my wife to go to a bin store ( mostly amazon returns ) with my grandson. she felt better before she even left. i hate to see my wife sad

mike

hugs mike, you are always doing the best you can. Let that comfort you. Prayers for your wife and my condolences on her and your loss.

 

[1964dodge]

hugs mike, you are always doing the best you can. Let that comfort you. Prayers for your wife and my condolences on her and your loss.

thank you and i know she will appreciate it

mike....

 

[MisterBGone]

It's just I wish he didn't have her as his future comittment, yet I'll be happy when he feels complete and married...if his goal is to marry her I'm ok. She knows, I'm almost certain. He said he wants to have a polyamouros love relationship. I don't believe you can truly love 2 people in the same way. I'm ok, just having a bit of wine, I hope you are ok too. Thanks for always giving me something that takes me time to think and ponder on.

H'mmm.....This is, ahh- a lot to consider. IF you feel, that all / or almost all of this - is inflexible, or non-negotiable, or Impossible (as in resistant or hesitant to change - his mind, that is.. & I don't mean convince, talk into, or co-erce). But if you feel that this is just going, or got to be the way that it is w/him & her and apparently now, even others that might possibly be entered into the mix. I think you've sort of kind of actually almost answered your question for you. Yourself, that is. In other words, do you wonder if his interpretation of events, from the other night, was viewed as an addition to his already own, or primary (#1, so to speak?). And if so: well, I think you know as you've already plainly stated, but are you perfectly fine & good, or reasoned and reasonable, can you wrap your mind around, and say "Hey? This is ok, I can accept this behavior & this little unique relationship here. I can even respect it. Others have as well, I guess..." But man, how does one not get jealous in a scenario such as that? And sorry, I'm not meaning or intending to pass judgement on him or his. For if they are all okay with it, everybody is on board, & 'cool!' Then who am I or we to argue. . . Unless, it's against the law or something? But since when has that ever stopped anybody! ;D Ha... Sorry, I shouldn't be so silly. It's the sugar, you know? : ) Yes, let's go with (or blame it on) that! It sounds or seems a risky proposition & prospect to me, given your sense & sensibilities laid out here in advance. Can you then -- find someone else? I know you may not want somebody else. But once you've sort of realized that that romantic ship has sailed with this man (at least insofar as you've envisioned it in your head: & that being one of the exclusive) perhaps you can begin to get to a place where you're comfortable with allowing your mind to sort of reset, and reshape how you view & frame things in this regard. Hard to let go, though, I know. Especially the more you've filled or colored in the details, so to speak. I'm sorry it doesn't seem overly optimistic. Short of him changing his mind, or I don't even know if there is a half-way meeting point that could be arrived at, in terms of discussion with regards coming to some sort of mutually arranged compromise, of sort? It kind of seems all or none. Or your way, or mine. With little wiggle room in between. As the differences are just so drastic, or night & day. Anyway! : ) Good luck, once again, and Best wishes to you...

 

[KM76710]

i had a tough start this morning. i didn't fall asleep until between 5am to 6am i think because i'm worried about my wife. i got broken sleep until arund 11am.

my wifes brother in law which she is close to got married again last year ( they were together around 5 years after he lost his first wife ). my wife talked to her a lot and was close to her as well. she died last night which my wife took hard. i had the usual talk with her that it's normal for us to lose family because we were both the baby of the family so younger. since we are in our mid 60s her family ranges from 70 to 80s and some in the 90s. it's just been a lot of deaths the last two years.

my son took my truck today to fix my exhaust and put a flowmaster muffler on it. he also changed the oil and had it stickered. since my grandson was down i asked him to bring my grandson over to help cheer up my wife. instead he picked up my wife to go to a bin store ( mostly amazon returns ) with my grandson. she felt better before she even left. i hate to see my wife sad

mike

Very sad to hear of the family's loss...

 

[1964dodge]

Very sad to hear of the family's loss...

thank you km

mike.....

 

[Windhover]

@1964dodge Condolences to your wife and her family members. I hope she feels peaceful and okay despite the sad loss. It is so sad to see and feel the loneliness come over a person, due to loss or death. I'm glad she has a lot of support mike.
hug

 

[Windhover]

you shouldn't let yourself feel like you're in love?

"Love the one you're with." 🤗

 

[nicktheundoer]

I'm glad you are feeling better than you did. I hope that trend continues. You help many people here. You deserve a good, happy life.

Thank you very much Pebble mouse for your kind words..

 

[nicktheundoer]

i had a tough start this morning. i didn't fall asleep until between 5am to 6am i think because i'm worried about my wife. i got broken sleep until arund 11am.

my wifes brother in law which she is close to got married again last year ( they were together around 5 years after he lost his first wife ). my wife talked to her a lot and was close to her as well. she died last night which my wife took hard. i had the usual talk with her that it's normal for us to lose family because we were both the baby of the family so younger. since we are in our mid 60s her family ranges from 70 to 80s and some in the 90s. it's just been a lot of deaths the last two years.

my son took my truck today to fix my exhaust and put a flowmaster muffler on it. he also changed the oil and had it stickered. since my grandson was down i asked him to bring my grandson over to help cheer up my wife. instead he picked up my wife to go to a bin store ( mostly amazon returns ) with my grandson. she felt better before she even left. i hate to see my wife sad

mike

I'm so sorry for the loss mike..I hope your wife heals completely..and she has got a lot of love from you..sending condolences to your family Mike..I hope the storm passes.. hugs.

 

[nicktheundoer]

Really agitiated. When I'm like this the hallucinations get intrusive. It's so hard to deal with

I get it pebblemouse..I'm sorry..HUGSS..I wish it wasn't that way..my love and prayers with you..hugs..🫂🫂

 

[nicktheundoer]

I'm kind of depressed and I don't know why. Today wasn't bad but I feel really disappointed because I'd planned to do a lot of work today, but I was really fatigued and feeling a bit under the weather so I didn't really do anything and was too tired to focus on much. I guess I should be glad I don't feel worse but I'm so tired of always ending up in this state of mind; it feels like no matter what I do or try I always end up here. I'm also just having a lot of intrusive thoughts and that's always hard to deal with

🫂🫂

 

[nicktheundoer]

Why is getting social support so challenging and they would dismiss you as a way to just say "I'll recover and I just need to adapt" while my mind does worry that I won't ever get better and that no one is present during difficult times if they keep like this. The other me would rather not be honest and just seem cringey about being that "plastic happy go lucky gal." Even if I'm honest to you, you'd still dismiss whatever concerns I have. I like struggling alone tbh. 😂💀

They wonder why I never open up to them and it would seem a sudden whenever I end up at hospitals to them. I have the right to keep personal if I want to.

Yeah..I get the feeling that no one will ever understand me..just loving myself and trying my best to get through the emotions..Hugs🫂

 

[MisterBGone]

Yeah..I get the feeling that no one will ever understand me..just loving myself and trying my best to get through the emotions..Hugs🫂

We all understand, get, and very definitely/or much: 'Do,' get-you @nicktheundoer ! : ) For what that's worth~ ;^) . . .

 

[puffymilk]

Surprisingly pretty good

 

[Road to Nowhere]

I don't give a shit about all that, because you know what, I can't learn anything from you, I can't read in some fuckin' book. -Robin Williams Good will Hunting-

 

[Astrid78]

i had a tough start this morning. i didn't fall asleep until between 5am to 6am i think because i'm worried about my wife. i got broken sleep until arund 11am.

my wifes brother in law which she is close to got married again last year ( they were together around 5 years after he lost his first wife ). my wife talked to her a lot and was close to her as well. she died last night which my wife took hard. i had the usual talk with her that it's normal for us to lose family because we were both the baby of the family so younger. since we are in our mid 60s her family ranges from 70 to 80s and some in the 90s. it's just been a lot of deaths the last two years.

my son took my truck today to fix my exhaust and put a flowmaster muffler on it. he also changed the oil and had it stickered. since my grandson was down i asked him to bring my grandson over to help cheer up my wife. instead he picked up my wife to go to a bin store ( mostly amazon returns ) with my grandson. she felt better before she even left. i hate to see my wife sad

mike

 

[Aurelia]

So I've started diving even deeper into the Bible and taking notes instead of just reading or listening to it and I've learned so many new things by doing this. It's absolutely wonderful looking for the heartbeat of God in the Scripture.

 

[TragicReality]

H'mmm.....This is, ahh- a lot to consider. IF you feel, that all / or almost all of this - is inflexible, or non-negotiable, or Impossible (as in resistant or hesitant to change - his mind, that is.. & I don't mean convince, talk into, or co-erce). But if you feel that this is just going, or got to be the way that it is w/him & her and apparently now, even others that might possibly be entered into the mix. I think you've sort of kind of actually almost answered your question for you. Yourself, that is. In other words, do you wonder if his interpretation of events, from the other night, was viewed as an addition to his already own, or primary (#1, so to speak?). And if so: well, I think you know as you've already plainly stated, but are you perfectly fine & good, or reasoned and reasonable, can you wrap your mind around, and say "Hey? This is ok, I can accept this behavior & this little unique relationship here. I can even respect it. Others have as well, I guess..." But man, how does one not get jealous in a scenario such as that? And sorry, I'm not meaning or intending to pass judgement on him or his. For if they are all okay with it, everybody is on board, & 'cool!' Then who am I or we to argue. . . Unless, it's against the law or something? But since when has that ever stopped anybody! ;D Ha... Sorry, I shouldn't be so silly. It's the sugar, you know? : ) Yes, let's go with (or blame it on) that! It sounds or seems a risky proposition & prospect to me, given your sense & sensibilities laid out here in advance. Can you then -- find someone else? I know you may not want somebody else. But once you've sort of realized that that romantic ship has sailed with this man (at least insofar as you've envisioned it in your head: & that being one of the exclusive) perhaps you can begin to get to a place where you're comfortable with allowing your mind to sort of reset, and reshape how you view & frame things in this regard. Hard to let go, though, I know. Especially the more you've filled or colored in the details, so to speak. I'm sorry it doesn't seem overly optimistic. Short of him changing his mind, or I don't even know if there is a half-way meeting point that could be arrived at, in terms of discussion with regards coming to some sort of mutually arranged compromise, of sort? It kind of seems all or none. Or your way, or mine. With little wiggle room in between. As the differences are just so drastic, or night & day. Anyway! : ) Good luck, once again, and Best wishes to you...

i'm old. Almost 56. I'm not looking for any other man, but i'm also a monogomous person. I dont believe it's right to sleep with someone who is also sleeping with someone else. I guess with all the texts when I was living there, and getting to know him, understanding him is what it is. She isn't affectionate or intimate with him. If he was also 'doing' her I wouldn't want him. This is something I will ask him again about though. I believe he was honest when he said we just sit and watch movies. There's no passion. ONly a quick peck good bye, I saw him say I love you to her and she roared off down the road, not even saying that back to him. I do think he'll marry her. I'm sorry this is like cheating. I'm good either way, but yes I'd like him to be mine. He isn't. It's ok. I just enjoy him if/when we can get together. He knows how to light my fire so to speak. Thanks @MisterBGone

 

[TragicReality]

"Love the one you're with." 🤗

I looked up that song, I like it. It's just me, i have to be good to myself and love myself. I'm not all broken hearted but sad when he leaves. Then again, we never know what tomorrow brings. So I stay in the moment, the present, and enjoy it. Thanks, you got it! hugs to you