I am not feel very well, I am extremely lonely and no longer know anymore how to make friends, how to contact people, I am very tired that everybody has dumped me, stabbed me, neglected me . I lost hope. I cannot be myself. I am tired of lying that everything is ok when it is not, but nobody can see me weak. People do not realize that it is an act of mercy to let me die if they cannot help me. I cannot help myself anymore. Nobody calls me, Nobody invites me. I am extremely scared. I helped a lot of people and at least I need appreciation. All the people can see is my defects. Nobody can see good in me. I do nine thing right but one wrong only they concentrate in the wrong one. I am trying to hard but without conections, love and support I cannot function anymore. All the group therapy programs were useless all the notes are catching dust as I do not have interest to revisit them as I do not have anybody to share. I can no longer stay in this earth. People should realize how miserable I am and I cannot hold anymore. At least people should try to make an attempt how I am doing. <mod edit: timeline> I do not have more options. I tried everything and nothing works