How Are You Feeling Right Now?

[AvidFan]

Ok considering a crap night. Maybe I'm starting to see the cosmic joke and laughing at the punchline. As if I didn't have enough to deal with, what with my body and brain all over the place, severe insomnia, work issues and frustrations, money worries and my house on the verge of falling apart (hence much worse money worries), I get up to find an ant scout crawling across the cooker. Jesus christ, they usually have the decency to wait until spring. So I've got the elements attacking the outside and the insect world attacking from within. You reach a point where you just think, this is absolute bullshit, this is a drama, and some celestial observer is having a fucking laugh at my expense.

I've put a bait trap out near where I saw it. So if I get a trail of ants all over the counter top, to and from the trap, taking the poison home to momma queen, that will be a win, but knowing my luck and experience they will probably just go round it and I'll see them carrying my canned goods back to their nest. I put poison down near their trash dump last year and they just closed the hole and moved on to find another exit instead of telling their friends about the big dollop of food.

 

[1964dodge]

i'm feeling pretty damned good today, not great but i'll take good any day lol

mike.....

 

[SillyOldBear]

Cold. Am really tired of this cold weather. Below freezing every night for over two weeks and expected to continue for another. Traces of snow almost every day. Don't remember ever having a cold streak lasting this long.

 

[TragicReality]

I'm still here. Had to take an extra pill for depression and anxiety. My son is alive. He keeps calling, I'm not supposed to talk to him. But I repeated he needs to go get help if he keeps saying he wants to end his life. I reported it yesterday to the police. That's all I can do. I know he can lie. Said someone stole all his money and tried to assault him. Again I said call 911 . It's out of my hands and there's been plenty of lying before. I slept a bit. He keeps finding new numbers to call or text or then he calls with a private number. Just got another text beating me down. I'm down enough.

 

[Sassy Cat]

Cold. Am really tired of this cold weather. Below freezing every night for over two weeks and expected to continue for another. Traces of snow almost every day. Don't remember ever having a cold streak lasting this long.

I feel you we are to have - temperatures overnight 5 days in a row Saturday on and it will not get above 20f for the next two weeks just yuck

 

[AvidFan]

Defeated again. I didn't sleep, but I got up and I did my best to tackle the day. I have been having major anxiety about my house and potential costs but decided to break it down into small steps. My anxiety was trying to make me bury my head in the sand and it took me a lot to make the first step as this could open a big expensive and very disruptive process. So I Whatsapped the roofer who came out last summer and fixed some issues then for a very reasonable price. Lovely chap. Answered my message in 5 minutes and came out within an hour, had it all sorted and massive relief. That was then... I messaged with the details saying I could send pics and I just wanted to get an idea of what needs doing in order of urgency.

This time, nothing. Double blue tick, read message. Nothing. So my new "go to roofer" is actually my "ghosted me" roofer. Figures. Why do I ever expect anything to actually work out right? So my anxiety will get worse as I've no idea what shit is going on up there. I mean if you're busy just tell me. Fuck I hate dealing with these types of people, one minute they can't do enough for you, the next it's basically "fuck you".

 

[KM76710]

Cold. Am really tired of this cold weather. Below freezing every night for over two weeks and expected to continue for another. Traces of snow almost every day. Don't remember ever having a cold streak lasting this long.

Too bad I can't share some of the warm weather we have been having, supposed to be 70s if not 80s the next day or so.

 

[HappyKitty]

Disappointed the aviation job I wanted still needed to do night shift as airport opened 24/7 so recruit has no control that we have to complete all rotation, so I backed out but I got an office job instead that didnt start too early, even if it end at 8pm either way which is fine and I can deal with medical leave after three months of probation. lol.

I just love how my resume has two types one is relevant with design/education and the other one is continuition so my efforts of doing short term contract is worth it and government do have record if I need to do another resume for recruit in the future, blessed that hr advice me on that. Nothing is a waste of effort, just waste of money. 🤣 This time round I wanna save money for a house and travel till I'm 35 years old cause my country only allow singles to have their own apartment at 35, this country is expensive thats why so we have to think of ageing, inflation and financially stable to live independently and not based on loans and debts, if I have plenty of outstanding bills, no job would probably accept me.

I need to stop claiming that I am a senior citizen or thinking I'm older than I am, lol. I forgot I am still young cause during islamic/chinese new year holiday, we had a great 5 days short trip to Terenganu, Malaysia visiting my long distant family and I got excited about trying out new local foods.

As long as I can be excited about new things and learning new things, but not thinking I know everything, I can stay youthful still. Just know there are someone older than my parents and they can still be healthy. Im so scared of isolation when I grow older maybe.

 

[Blueberry9]

I feel like I am on roller coaster of emotions, it's fun but also scary and I can't get off.

 

[puffymilk]

In a much better mood today. Thank god

 

[AvidFan]

Almost resigned to the fact that life is not going to relent and if it's determined to push me over the edge, I might as well jump. If it's a case of problems and suffering exceeding the capacity and resources to cope, my resources are about 5% and the problems/suffering is at 95%, so I am on very thin ice at the moment.

 

[ClassicsFan]

Touched.

 

[LumberJack]

It’s a mental pain. I can focus, but I am also in moderate to severe depression, I feel like I’m waking through molasses; everything feels harder right now.

 

[Windhover]

Antsy, bored, morose, small-minded, travel-lust, a bit manic

 

[AvidFan]

Flipped. Suddenly felt confident and capable of anything again. Happy to feel better but know at some point I'll flip back to the other, desperate and sad me and there doesn't seem any way to control it 😢 Sleep would probably help.

 

[LumberJack]

I’m feeling unwelcome in a number of life areas. It seems like any time I try to set boundaries, I am either the bad guy for bringing it up, or the other person is uninterested in having a conversation. If I am the a-hole so consistently, something is wrong with my approach.

I have had to deal with some environments that were unhealthy, so I am not so worried about that. I’m paying them money for their services, so I should not be expected to be tactful when they are failing to provide what I paid for. In fact, I believe it should be the other way around.

But I apparently can’t talk with my roommate either, although she has no reluctance to complain about my behaviors. This is frustrating because I tolerate her neurotic behaviors with no complaints. I feel it’s a part of sharing space to tolerate the other person’s idiosyncrasies. I feel unwelcome because it seems to be a one way street.

Other than that, I am getting along with others. It’s just that if I look over the past, there seems to be a pattern of people or companies that are uninterested in my satisfaction, while expecting me to please them. It’s so frustrating that I want to escape. If I can’t get euthanasia, could I at least be put in a coma until I can?

 

[ClassicsFan]

why are you concerned? i hope whatever is concerning you gets solved soon

mike.....

I haven’t heard from one of my coworkers in a month, and I'm getting ghosted again.

 

[1964dodge]

I'm still here. Had to take an extra pill for depression and anxiety. My son is alive. He keeps calling, I'm not supposed to talk to him. But I repeated he needs to go get help if he keeps saying he wants to end his life. I reported it yesterday to the police. That's all I can do. I know he can lie. Said someone stole all his money and tried to assault him. Again I said call 911 . It's out of my hands and there's been plenty of lying before. I slept a bit. He keeps finding new numbers to call or text or then he calls with a private number. Just got another text beating me down. I'm down enough.

i'm sorry that he treats you this way. i hope he eventually learns to stand on his own feet and someday makes you proud of him

mike....

 

[1964dodge]

It’s a mental pain. I can focus, but I am also in moderate to severe depression, I feel like I’m waking through molasses; everything feels harder right now.

 

[1964dodge]

I’m feeling unwelcome in a number of life areas. It seems like any time I try to set boundaries, I am either the bad guy for bringing it up, or the other person is uninterested in having a conversation. If I am the a-hole so consistently, something is wrong with my approach.

I have had to deal with some environments that were unhealthy, so I am not so worried about that. I’m paying them money for their services, so I should not be expected to be tactful when they are failing to provide what I paid for. In fact, I believe it should be the other way around.

But I apparently can’t talk with my roommate either, although she has no reluctance to complain about my behaviors. This is frustrating because I tolerate her neurotic behaviors with no complaints. I feel it’s a part of sharing space to tolerate the other person’s idiosyncrasies. I feel unwelcome because it seems to be a one way street.

Other than that, I am getting along with others. It’s just that if I look over the past, there seems to be a pattern of people or companies that are uninterested in my satisfaction, while expecting me to please them. It’s so frustrating that I want to escape. If I can’t get euthanasia, could I at least be put in a coma until I can?

first since this is a prolife site we wouldn't reccomend euthanasia. but i think there is a better way than euthanasia or coma because there is no way to get better. i prefer to survive the best i can and try to find ways to make life at least a little better. of course it doesn't always work but preferable to those other 2 ways. i hope you feel better soon

mike....