I feel like an idiot. And worthless. And afraid for my state of mind.
Ok, I'm in the first real day of it all. Neatly packing his things which didn't get taken yesterday, putting it in the garage to protect his belongings that remain.....I will not take the blame for what is happening. I will take responsibility for things that are mine to take but I will not have someone pointing a finger at me saying it is all my doing. He is a quiet man and doesn't share a lot regarding emotions and mental state. He said he had mental issues the first couple of months we met, he never stated specifically but I knew depression was a part of his story along with other wounds (that we all carry) and my silly assessment said to my mind that therapy would be enough, along with providing a safe environment and some security and caring from me. The caring that was present that he said he had never received in his life.....
I have learned an extremely valuable lesson about how very little I know and I intuitively know and hopefully believe that if I stay open to lessons that are to be had and will unfold that it will grow and ease and expand me. I just have to make the choices to get out of my own way.
And I have to learn again how to be alone (not in a relationship) This is not going to be easy on any level.
Ok, I'm in the first real day of it all. Neatly packing his things which didn't get taken yesterday, putting it in the garage to protect his belongings that remain.....I will not take the blame for what is happening. I will take responsibility for things that are mine to take but I will not have someone pointing a finger at me saying it is all my doing. He is a quiet man and doesn't share a lot regarding emotions and mental state. He said he had mental issues the first couple of months we met, he never stated specifically but I knew depression was a part of his story along with other wounds (that we all carry) and my silly assessment said to my mind that therapy would be enough, along with providing a safe environment and some security and caring from me. The caring that was present that he said he had never received in his life.....
I have learned an extremely valuable lesson about how very little I know and I intuitively know and hopefully believe that if I stay open to lessons that are to be had and will unfold that it will grow and ease and expand me. I just have to make the choices to get out of my own way.
And I have to learn again how to be alone (not in a relationship) This is not going to be easy on any level.
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you are so kind.....