So when I replied earlier I was in a better place than I am now. It's hard to quit. I keep thinking it might have been not so bad, or maybe I'm just over-dramatizing what happened when I drank. But then I remember why I quit. It wasn't working anymore. It worked in the beginning and that is why I kept doing it, but eventually it became more and more painful, and less and less fun. By now it's pretty much all pain and very little fun, if any. So although I still crave the escape that I once achieved with alcohol, I have no desire to go back to the place where alcohol takes me in terms of hangovers, guilt, anxiety, and more.