Miss your ex? Maybe this thread will help

[SAVE_ME]

Thanks for posting this thread. I've just gone through a break-up only recently so this will help me let off some steam.

I won't mention her name, I'll just call her J.

1) Ignored my birthday.

2) Told me she'd been stringing me along all these months and that she'd never loved me and never will. And then afterwards she had the audacity to tell me that I was one of the best friends she'd ever had!

3) Had a big mouth. She was one of those opinionated types who thought that her point of view was the be all and end all, and a lot of the time she let her opinionated nature get the better of her and got into arguments with other members, so naturally, as a loving bf would do I stood up for her and often ended up taking the heat for her.

4) Never told her family or friends about me, and now they'll probably never know.

5) Threw all the letters, and all the birthday, Christmas and Valentines cards and gifts I'd sent her in the trash.

6) Was always so self-absorbed. When I was going through a hard time she didn't wanna cheer me up or anything, all she cared about was how she felt, and once had a go at me for bringing her down when she was in a good mood.

7) Lazy as hell. Told me she'd be online one day and then she wouldn't, and always made up this dumb 'sleeping in' excuse for it.

8) Never once seemed like she was intent on coming to meet me or anything. I was going to have to be the one to see her.

BTW this was a long distance relationship, in case any of you were wondering.

 

[ghetofabgurl89]

Ex's Name: Andrew

1) First and foremost, Andrew exploited my self esteem. He knew I believed myself to be worthless, and by being my only outlet made me call him "Master". I served him as his "pet" for four years...

2) Andrew cheated on our relationship numerous times. He had hardcore sex with women and men alike, then came back to me and explicitly told me about it all.

3) Andrew lied to me about cheating on our relationships. He would tell me "Oh, yesterday my friend Aja came over and she wanted me, so I fucked her." just to see how I would react, then tell me he was testing me.

I lost track of sorting the truth from the lies.

4) "Master" ordered me to have sex with him in numerous ways. When I refused to comply, he cut me off for hours, days, WEEKS at a time.

It killed me inside.

5) Andrew raped the innocence from me. I went over to his house three times. The first time he didn't touch me. The second time he almost raped me. The third time he harassed me sexually in front of his sister when I wouldn't come with him to his room.

I almost let him have me.

6) Andrew ALWAYS, religiously told me about how beautiful or how cute his other girl/guy friends were. He talked about how wonderful it would be to be in a relationship with various people other than me.

How did he think that made me feel?

If I as a woman wasn't good enough for him...I mean, MEN? I should have been numb to it by then, since he'd cheated with guys before.

Damn my weak heart.

7) Andrew was never compassionate or romantic with me. He was so malevolant with his words and his orders, that when he was RARELY kind, I relished the moments. Revelled in them.

I hate myself for being so desperate.

8)Andrew turned me into a psychopathic, dependant BITCH with nonexistant self esteem.

It's been 3 days since I've broken up with him.

Hallelujah.

...but who am I now?

 

[Hae-Gi]

Ex's Name: Andrew

1) First and foremost, Andrew exploited my self esteem. He knew I believed myself to be worthless, and by being my only outlet made me call him "Master". I served him as his "pet" for four years...

2) Andrew cheated on our relationship numerous times. He had hardcore sex with women and men alike, then came back to me and explicitly told me about it all.

3) Andrew lied to me about cheating on our relationships. He would tell me "Oh, yesterday my friend Aja came over and she wanted me, so I fucked her." just to see how I would react, then tell me he was testing me.

I lost track of sorting the truth from the lies.

4) "Master" ordered me to have sex with him in numerous ways. When I refused to comply, he cut me off for hours, days, WEEKS at a time.

It killed me inside.

5) Andrew raped the innocence from me. I went over to his house three times. The first time he didn't touch me. The second time he almost raped me. The third time he harassed me sexually in front of his sister when I wouldn't come with him to his room.

I almost let him have me.

6) Andrew ALWAYS, religiously told me about how beautiful or how cute his other girl/guy friends were. He talked about how wonderful it would be to be in a relationship with various people other than me.

How did he think that made me feel?

If I as a woman wasn't good enough for him...I mean, MEN? I should have been numb to it by then, since he'd cheated with guys before.

Damn my weak heart.

7) Andrew was never compassionate or romantic with me. He was so malevolant with his words and his orders, that when he was RARELY kind, I relished the moments. Revelled in them.

I hate myself for being so desperate.

8)Andrew turned me into a psychopathic, dependant BITCH with nonexistant self esteem.

It's been 3 days since I've broken up with him.

Hallelujah.

...but who am I now?

Sounds like someone deserving far more than just death. Sorry for this terrible experience of yours... unfortunately, this is how most Master/slave relationships end up, with weak, pathetic "Masters" like your ex, but it's not always the case. The truest form of love is found in the select few Master/slave relationships in which strength and love can never be separated.

 

[ghetofabgurl89]

Sounds like someone deserving far more than just death. Sorry for this terrible experience of yours... unfortunately, this is how most Master/slave relationships end up, with weak, pathetic "Masters" like your ex, but it's not always the case. The truest form of love is found in the select few Master/slave relationships in which strength and love can never be separated.

MICHAEL left me for some other women. Yes, PLURAL.

So now in my loneliness, I'm considering subjecting myself to what I posted again. Only it'll be worse now, because he is LIVID that I broke things off with him...tried to escape him....

 

[plates]

my gf? is she an ex? who knows. does anyone know? but recently i told her- you strangled me for so many years. it's only recently i realised how you made me so anxious and worried and self hating, how you controlled my actions for NO REASON, going to certain parts of london was not going to hurt you and then say that i was boring that i was mentally ill...i was going CRAZY living with you.

and when i think about it, she never made me feel beautiful. i was just an experiment for her, but she didn't 'love' me. i was a friend whom she could fuck and play with when she wanted at the beginning. but no love. when i first met her she'd talk about how 'good looking' or 'pretty' other people were or about other boys haircuts and how she'd want me to have a boys (60s esque) haircut or how she wished i was a boy or that i had to cut my hair to make me look less 'girlie'(great way to talk to me when we first had sex right?).
she called me a brazen whore later on...
said she wished she was with a man/boy so she could...made me feel like complete and utter crap at the beginning. :rolleyes:
she never wants to talk about those days. she clams up, looks pained, she gets teary and says she felt like she sexually assaulted me. at least we agree on a few things there. i suppose that's why i'm with her. she's honest.

er..what else.

"i only like you in the first two hours when i want to hug and cuddle you and you're adorable and the last two hours before you leave."

i had an argument about that in london a week ago when i was supposed to be 'recovering.' but i made up with her and said sorry for saying i hate you and i've felt objectified by you and i think we're going down two very separate paths in life now- i'm really starting to find out who i am without you. (she was tearful over that) and maybe we'll have an enjoyable time next time we go out because that time "there's no point in going out with you, you ruin it by being moody" blah fucking blah same old shit i've heard. what do you expect when you say things that make me feel like i'm just there for your entertainment and you don't make me feel like a human being?

suddenly wants to kiss me like we are girlfriends, then we are platonic friends. wtf.

today she called me up and said how much she loves me. i told her why tell me this now? it's because there was a death with a close colleague. that's why. only when someone fucking dies then she calls me up and tells me she loves me from her heart because she understands that LIFE ISN'T PERMENANT. (she felt bad as she reassured her friend that her son would be okay. the police afterwards doused her with reality, that yes, people die and yes, not everyone is 'okay.')

 

[Hae-Gi]

MICHAEL left me for some other women. Yes, PLURAL.

So now in my loneliness, I'm considering subjecting myself to what I posted again. Only it'll be worse now, because he is LIVID that I broke things off with him...tried to escape him....

Don't do that. -_-; All he deserves is being tortured to death. People like him are lesser humans... how can you possibly submit yourself to such a lowly person...?

 

[ghetofabgurl89]

Don't do that. -_-; All he deserves is being tortured to death. People like him are lesser humans... how can you possibly submit yourself to such a lowly person...?

Honestly? Purely out of consistency. It's sick, but it's what I'm used to. It's been so long and my life is so defined by his maltreatment that I need it to be there. I feel like a lowly person myself for letting things go this far in the first place. How could I possibly fight against that?

 

[Hae-Gi]

Honestly? Purely out of consistency. It's sick, but it's what I'm used to. It's been so long and my life is so defined by his maltreatment that I need it to be there. I feel like a lowly person myself for letting things go this far in the first place. How could I possibly fight against that?

A true Master should never abuse His slave, though... punishments and such aren't what I have in mind, of course; those are made out of love for the slave. But when the Master steps out of His position as a respectable authority, like your "Master" has done, he no longer can be seen as a true Master. A genuine Master/slave relationship needs a basis in true love, and what he's done to you has nothing to do with love. Without true love, the relationship is just a contradiction. It's not your fault that he's abused his position... the slave shall only serve, so how can any of this error be loaded unto you?

 

[andy2022002]

1. She isolated me from my friends and family
2. she would be moody over stupid things *spoilt brat comes to mind
3. lie to me face but me bein the soft touch seen somethink stupid in her to believe her * as i found out everythink when we split !!
4. turn into a bitch around her friends
5. makes loads of rules up and decides to change them to when she likes
6. sex life with her was'nt enough
7. would go crazy if i talked to another girl, but wouldnt let me say nothink over lads grabbin her and chattin her up
8. always drinkin too much and leaving me to look after her and takein her home after she has had her fun while i missin out
9. she would critsize nearly everythink i would suggest for ideas on nearly everythink
10. she would only talk serious with me wen she could be bothered or wanted somethink * selfish comes to mind

i was with her for 5 years and still after all i still love her after about a year after splitting know confusing and frustrating . good post feels like you have took a weight off me shoulders after me goin over the flaws :rolleyes: