Some advice please

[Batch0x0]

Hello,

I'm hoping that someone could give me some advice please. I regularly chat via email to a young man in the USA, we met online over a year ago on another mental health forum when I was suffering quite badly from anxiety and he had his own mental health problems. We just support each other really.
The problem is, he is very suicidal. He feels lonely, worthless and inferior to everyone else and thinks that everyone hates him. He has been diagnosed with Bi-polar as well as other mental health problems.
He is already in therapy and goes to a support group, plus he has medication which he thinks is making him worse so he is weaning himself off it with the approval of his doctor.
I try to support him as much as I can and tell him that he is not worthless or inferior etc. I try to be very gentle about how I word things and let him know that I am always there to listen to his problems.
But I feel like I'm going round and round in circles saying the same things over and over again, I don't know the right things to say to him that might make him feel a little better.
Does anyone have any suggestions on how to handle this sort of thing? Any help would be appreciated.

Thanks
R

 

[nobodyknows71]

Hey there, it sounds like you doing all the right things already. Bottom line is really HE is the only one who can pull himself out of this. I guess all you can do is more of the same. He knows you’re there for him and it sounds like he confides in you about how he feels. That’s a good thing. Maybe a change in meds would help him.
But, remember that you need to look after you too. If this is beginning to have a negative effect on YOUR mental health be careful. You need to look after you too.

 

[Batch0x0]

Hey there, it sounds like you doing all the right things already. Bottom line is really HE is the only one who can pull himself out of this. I guess all you can do is more of the same. He knows you’re there for him and it sounds like he confides in you about how he feels. That’s a good thing. Maybe a change in meds would help him.
But, remember that you need to look after you too. If this is beginning to have a negative effect on YOUR mental health be careful. You need to look after you too.

Thanks for replying to me. I think you're right, there's not much else I can do other than listen to his problems. I just wish I could think of something different to say that might help him feel more positive about life, but I think his mental health problems have such a grip on him that no words will make any difference :-(

 

[nobodyknows71]

Thanks for replying to me. I think you're right, there's not much else I can do other than listen to his problems. I just wish I could think of something different to say that might help him feel more positive about life, but I think his mental health problems have such a grip on him that no words will make any difference :-(

As hard as that is to accept, I think it’s the right thing. Positive words and intentions can’t only take you so far. As I said... bottom line it’s HIS issues that have got him to where he is, and I think it’s only him that can crawl his way out.
Doesn’t stop you being a friend and being there for him as much as your mental well-being will let you. But just remember you count too.

 

[may71]

I just wish I could think of something different to say that might help him feel more positive about life

You may be helping him more than you realize. Just knowing that there's someone out there who cares and is trying to help is often times more important than any particular thing that you say.

I feel like I'm going round and round in circles saying the same things over and over agai

You don't have to say anything new