Re: Are you feeling suicidal today?
Yeah. For the past six months things have been very hard. I can't really DO anything because I have a wife to support and take care of. Since she's too old to work and only receives minimal social security I can't leave her alone.
But I can think about suicide every day, even if I don't want to. The thoughts keep creeping into my mind. I've read extensively on the subject, have evaluated all the diferent ways of taking action, chosen my method - but I haven't obtained any "tools" yet. That would be really dangerous. I drink a bit, sleep a lot, smoke cigarettes to keep the thoughts away.
You see, the Great Recession has claimed my business as a victim. After 22 years of problem-free active working on my own, for myself. I've applied for all kinds of jobs, but it appears that no one wants a 64-year old mediator. Can't move to a better area because our house is, as they say, upside down (mortgage exceeds fair market value).
On searching the web, I'm surprised at how few real websites there are that actually advocate in favor of suicide. For 100 hits you may find one lukewarm pro-suicide site. Usually as a gravestone for a long deceased site. I don't see the need anymore for the hysteria about pro-suicide chat rooms, etc.
This site looked interesting, because if the reality problems that drag me under went away, I'd be perfectly happy to stay alive and enjoy the flowers. It's all a question of money or the lack thereof. My wife is cheerful, but she doesn't really grasp the size of the hole we're in. We no longer have money for food! And there are better ways to go on a diet.
Well, thanks for reading.
Zola
Yeah. For the past six months things have been very hard. I can't really DO anything because I have a wife to support and take care of. Since she's too old to work and only receives minimal social security I can't leave her alone.
But I can think about suicide every day, even if I don't want to. The thoughts keep creeping into my mind. I've read extensively on the subject, have evaluated all the diferent ways of taking action, chosen my method - but I haven't obtained any "tools" yet. That would be really dangerous. I drink a bit, sleep a lot, smoke cigarettes to keep the thoughts away.
You see, the Great Recession has claimed my business as a victim. After 22 years of problem-free active working on my own, for myself. I've applied for all kinds of jobs, but it appears that no one wants a 64-year old mediator. Can't move to a better area because our house is, as they say, upside down (mortgage exceeds fair market value).
On searching the web, I'm surprised at how few real websites there are that actually advocate in favor of suicide. For 100 hits you may find one lukewarm pro-suicide site. Usually as a gravestone for a long deceased site. I don't see the need anymore for the hysteria about pro-suicide chat rooms, etc.
This site looked interesting, because if the reality problems that drag me under went away, I'd be perfectly happy to stay alive and enjoy the flowers. It's all a question of money or the lack thereof. My wife is cheerful, but she doesn't really grasp the size of the hole we're in. We no longer have money for food! And there are better ways to go on a diet.
Well, thanks for reading.
Zola
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