Why I dont want to let go of suicidal thoughts

[nicktheundoer]

I do not think that this is true. It sounds nice but when it comes down to it we do not decide what hurts and what doesnt. On a neurophysiological physical and mental pain are the same. Even though they come from different sources they are perceived in the same part of our brain. Psychological pain was developed evelotionary so we tend to conform to other people because as tribal creatures it benefits our survival. The same ways we do not chose if a stab wound hurts we do to chose if a betrayal hurts. We can influence our behavior and what we do about it but the pain stays the same.

Emotionally I 100% agree..what you're saying is absolutely right..what I'm saying is about mental pressure..of meeting someone else's expectations..anyway hugsss...

 

[MysteriousVirus]

I completely get what you mean, I keep repeating the same thing to myself too 'Being here was not my decision but not being here is'. I don't want to let go of my suicidal thoughts either because honestly things in my life have a very slim almost non-existent chance of improvement. It would take a major miracle to make things better and I hate myself, my situation, and my life to much to put in the tremendous effort for improving it. Life is really not that good to live in. When I open up people tell me think about the kids in Africa or war torn countries but like what can I really do about them, there is no way I can help them. I'm sorry if I can't explain myself eloquently, English isn't my first language. In conclusion, I have an attachment to my suicidal feelings. I'd really love not being here but things hold me back like religious trauma (thoughts of hell, afterlife punishment even though I'm not religious), failed attempt resulting in injuries, and just cowardice in general.

 

[Paul1963]

I completely get what you mean, I keep repeating the same thing to myself too 'Being here was not my decision but not being here is'. I don't want to let go of my suicidal thoughts either because honestly things in my life have a very slim almost non-existent chance of improvement. It would take a major miracle to make things better and I hate myself, my situation, and my life to much to put in the tremendous effort for improving it. Life is really not that good to live in. When I open up people tell me think about the kids in Africa or war torn countries but like what can I really do about them, there is no way I can help them. I'm sorry if I can't explain myself eloquently, English isn't my first language. In conclusion, I have an attachment to my suicidal feelings. I'd really love not being here but things hold me back like religious trauma (thoughts of hell, afterlife punishment even though I'm not religious), failed attempt resulting in injuries, and just cowardice in general.

So sorry you are suffering. I too think that life is overrated. And opening up to people who are not suffering from mental illness and suicidal thoughts is difficult, because they rarely understand us. I suspect I am also attached to suicidal thoughts, because thoughts of dying are the only thing that bring me comfort. At least people on this forum will understand you and offer support. 🤗

 

[Aurelia]

We have a basic biological instinct to avoid death. You might think you're not afraid of dying and feel callous about it, but if you were in a situation where your life was in danger, you'd most likely do everything to stay alive. Like I said, it's biological instinct rather than something you sit and think about.

 

[Paul1963]

We have a basic biological instinct to avoid death. You might think you're not afraid of dying and feel callous about it, but if you were in a situation where your life was in danger, you'd most likely do everything to stay alive. Like I said, it's biological instinct rather than something you sit and think about.

You are right: survival instinct is way more powerful than we think.

 

[GreySoDark]

We have a basic biological instinct to avoid death. You might think you're not afraid of dying and feel callous about it, but if you were in a situation where your life was in danger, you'd most likely do everything to stay alive. Like I said, it's biological instinct rather than something you sit and think about.

TW: suicide attempt. True. When I tried to end my life it was always hard cause its essentially your body instinkts against your mind. It is never easy to even try to do that. But the number of people dying by their own hand tells us that its not impossible. One might have a lot of suicidal thoughts but not try to commit suicide because they simply dont have the energy and will. Thats why most suicide attemts happen on days the person actually feels better, because they have the strenght to try.