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suicidal ideation

  1. CoffeeArtist

    I'm not getting better

    My parents think that I am getting better, nearing the end of depression, but little do they know how I am still suicidal. I can't tell them because they'll be hurt yet again and the entire cycle of guilt would be repeated. Meds are working, undoubtedly, but now that my self-written book is...
  2. S

    I just keep digging my grave

    I don't really know how to start. i don't even know if some of the things i want to say will break the rules on here. i don't even know if i belong on here. All i do know, i need for this pain to stop one way or the other. i have made three serious attempts on my life; once by <method edit > I...
  3. sisyphus

    Family trouble

    I don't get along well with my family. My entire life I felt like they hated me. They have stopped and became "supportive", stopped the abuse (specially physical) bad everything. But they never noticed I was depressed, they ignored all of my mental health issues and have always put me as lazy...
  4. Booman1990

    Loneliness

    I am just so lonely, all I have are a couple of friends, some good some not so good. I don't have a relationship partner and cant seem to get one because I cant drive because I have seizures. So it's hard to meet new people. I try to make friends off phone apps and it works for a little bit...
  5. Rockclimbinggirl

    Visualizing

    I have been visualizing various methods more and more lately. I am not sure why. Parts of my life are going well, and parts of it aren't. I am hating intrusive memories more and more. I don't want to carry on like this :(
  6. Rockclimbinggirl

    I do not see a point in trying

    I just do not. I tried to spend as much time as possible asleep this past weekend. Being asleep, gives me a break. I am hating being awake. I cannot get my brain to stop thinking about abuse.
  7. lightning05

    Losing It

    I have been gone for a little while from the forum. Being a full time student and working full time has been quite overwhelming for the past month and I was hoping that being so busy would keep me from suicidal ideation. In reality, nothing will get me out of this depression and hopelessness...
  8. Rockclimbinggirl

    I want to give up

    I do not even know why I just do. Do not want to keep fighting. :(
  9. lightning05

    So sad it hurts

    I've been gone for a while, mostly because work has been crazy and I have a summer class that is killing my free time but also because I was away this past week and a half with two friends on a trip. My trip was wonderful and it was fun to be with my friends like that but I notice that no matter...
  10. Rockclimbinggirl

    I want to give up

    I really just want to give up yet at the same time part of me doesn't. I find myself visualizing various methods, but with no intentions since I don't have the stuff needed for them.
  11. Rockclimbinggirl

    Cannot

    I cannot stand the little girl in me telling me it was my fault. I just cannot live with the guilt of being responsible.
  12. Rockclimbinggirl

    Wanting to harm myself at the thought of going home

    Just thinking about going home has increased my suicidal ideations and is making me want to self harm. Yet I still sort of want to go home. I know that I need to do what is best for me but at the moment it seems like I wont. I do not really know why, is this all due to self destruction.
  13. lightning05

    Still

    On the surface everything in my life has been working out. The new job I started last week is going well and is keeping me busy and I know to my friends and family I seem happier. Maybe it is also my fault for pretending to be happier. However I still feel like I don't belong here. I've been...
  14. Butterfly

    At what point should you be concerned about suicidal ideation?

    I apologise to all if this is triggering and for the length of this post, but this has been something that has been playing on my mind for a long time and I really feel like I need to discuss it to get it out of my system. I have suffered with suicidal ideation many times over the past 12 or so...
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